Worst Parent Stories

moondog80

heart is two sizes two small
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Sep 20, 2005
5,124
moondog80 said:
Managing a majors team in fall ball this year, mostly 10-12 years olds.  We had out first game Saturday, I get to the dugout, put my stuff down, within 30 seconds a parent (who is not an assistant and apparently has a rep of being a major pain in the ass) comes in and we have this conversation:
 
Him: Is Johnny pitching today?
Me: No.
Him: Why not?
 
I explain to him that he'll get in there at some point, just not today.  He tells me that Johnny is a great pitcher, has been pitching AAU, all that.  Later one of my assistants tells me that Johnny just signed up for AAU this fall and has yet to play a game.  Johnny isn't a bad player, but he's maybe our 7th best pitcher.  It's fall ball so he'll still get some opportunity, but probably not as much as dad wants. Even less so since we have 14 kids, which means lots of bench time for everyone when they show up.  Fortunately, that probably won't happen much. 
 
This guy has laid low for a little while but today I got an email (that may as well have been written by a third grader) saying that I should have his kid start the next game, and he should hit leadoff too.  He also said I should stop batting "my kids" higher than him in the order.    
 
The kid has pitched for an inning 3 times this year and each time gave up 5 runs (which is the max in our league).  My son, who is far better, has pitched the same number of times, with far better results (let in 2 runs overall), but he's just not one of our best so that's why his appearances have been limited.  That's what I told him -- this is majors, the best kids pitch, I'd like to pitch my son more too -- but the guy either doesn't care or doesn't understand.  The kid has also hit higher in the lineup than my son every single game -- I think he was talking about the kids of the assistants, who do hit higher, because they are better.
 
The sad thing is that the kid is the sweetest, most polite kid on the team.  Tons of enthusiasm, really wants to be there.  And he's an OK player -- alternates between 3B and OF, definitely not one of the "bad" players. But I would rather take the worst kid in the league than draft this kid next year.  
 
We do have back-to-back games this week, one of which we are going to get beat badly, so my plan is to pitch our B squad that entire game, so he'll get in then.  Which I almost don't want to do, but I'm not going to make the kid pay for dad's sins. But before that, we have a game tomorrow, and the plan is for just our top 3 to pitch.  I half expect him to pull his kid out of the dugout (he did that once too, kids was bawling because he was going to bat the next inning, not sure if it was over lineup because, frankly,  I was afraid to ask).
 

moondog80

heart is two sizes two small
SoSH Member
Sep 20, 2005
5,124
Update: So on Sunday we have a game, our starter runs into pitch count issues so I bring in my son to use a bridge to our next big arm -- there were two guys on base and runs already in so I was more or less conceding the 5 run max because I didn't want to waste pitches for my best guys when the runs would likely score no matter what.  He comes to the fence and accuses me of putting my son ahead of the team -- I offer to show him my scorebook that shows that my kid has hit lower in the lineup every game, and the two of them have pitched the same number of times (neither are great but my assistants, who actually are far more experienced than I, both assure my son in better because while hitable, he generally throws strikes).  He doesn't take me up on it, the assistant breaks it up, and that's that.  Later I use his kid as a bridge when the next kid is in trouble, and dad thanks me.
 
Two nights ago I use his kid in a relief situation again.  My kid does not pitch at all.
 
Last night his kid does not pitch.  I bring in mine with the run the will trigger the mercy rule on 2nd base.  1st pitch, ground ball through the 1B leg, game over.  He pulls his kid form out little post-game speech in LF, I obviously know why.
 
Today he sends me an e-mail (actually, he sent it to the entire team's parents, can't tell if he thinks they will all rally around him or he just doesn't understand about "reply all")  saying that I obviously have a problem with his son (who, as I said above, is the sweetest, most polite kid on the team).  I reply (to just him and my assistants) basically repeating all the things I had already told him.  He replies "then just start him and pull him if he walks one batter".  This is truly frightening -- he's willing to put his kid in a position that would almost certainly end up in utter humiliation, staring a game and being pulled after a few batters.  Obviously, I would never do that.  I finally tell him that his son is not starting (nor mine), that the is zero basis for the accusation that I'm being unfair to his kid, that I resent being told I'm favoring my kid, and that he is not to confront me during a game.
 
I've reported all this to the league manager, I'm not ashamed to say that I'm more than a little scared that there might be an incident.  I'm also a little disappointed that though e-mail went to all, not one parent has come forward in support and told the guy to fuck off.  Even if they are scared (which I would understand), I have not heard form anyone privately  (not yet anyway, to be fair).  I moved to this community 16 months ago and have already managed two teams and assisted on two others.  Managing a team is a bit above my pay grade, to be honest (more comfortable as an assistant, I understand the game but can't diagnose mechanical issues or anything like that), but both times they needed someone so I stepped up.  If the league and parents offer me no support in dealing with this asshole, I'll never again lift a finger to help out.  I may just resign effective immediately.
 
Anyway, thanks for listening.  I'm sure this will all blow over, but it's been a pretty stressful week. 
 

Just a bit outside

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Apr 6, 2011
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Sorry MoonDog, that stinks.  At this point I think you need to send an email, cc the league and your assistants, and let this guy know you will no longer be in contact with him, in person or by email.  If he has any complaints he can go through the league.
 

moondog80

heart is two sizes two small
SoSH Member
Sep 20, 2005
5,124
Just a bit outside said:
Sorry MoonDog, that stinks.  At this point I think you need to send an email, cc the league and your assistants, and let this guy know you will no longer be in contact with him, in person or by email.  If he has any complaints he can go through the league.
 
 
Thanks.  The league is involved, I've documented everything and sent it along.  Apparently this guy has a bad reputation in the league already.  And a criminal record. 
 

Heinie Wagner

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Nov 14, 2001
669
Simsbury, CT
moondog80 said:
 
 
Thanks.  The league is involved, I've documented everything and sent it along.  Apparently this guy has a bad reputation in the league already.  And a criminal record. 
 
Moondog, sorry for that situation. I've had friends and my wife go through similar no-win situations.  Keep in mind, it's not you, it's him.  This guy would have a problem with anyone, so don't put any of this on anything you've done. If anything, it sounds like you're going above and beyond in minimizing how much you pitch your kid (you're volunteering, it's ok to favor him a bit) and how much you're pitching his kid.
 
I have no good advice on how to handle this guy, but I can tell you how to handle yourself, don't take it personal, he's the one with issues not you. Reasonable people around that LL will see it that way. They may not step up and support you because most people just don't have that in them. You've done nothing wrong, do not let this guy get to you. Keep up the good work, kids need good coaches and coaches that care.  I've seen my share of a-hole coaches and when stuff like this happens to them, they don't give a damn.  Just that fact that this clearly bothers you shows you're one of the good guys.
 

slowstrung

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Jul 18, 2005
46
Alexandria, VA
moondog80 said:
Thanks.  The league is involved, I've documented everything and sent it along.  Apparently this guy has a bad reputation in the league already.  And a criminal record.
You may want to consider calling your local police department and just explain everything you posted here. Obviously he has not done anything to the level of a crime, but tell them he has a criminal record and has been making you increasingly concerned. For one, they may have some decent advice on how to defuse any future situations, especially with all the kids present. For another, they may step up patrols near your parks/playing fields. Basically, it may not help, but certainly can't hurt.

I suggest this because I had a similar issue with a townhouse neighbor who was going beyond mere obnoxious behavior a few years ago. A 10 minute conversation with a sergeant was firstly a huge stress relief just to get the bad neighbor on their radar. Second, they did eventually patrol and see him pulling his act in the parking lot (I won't bother getting into the list of shit this guy pulled, it would fill a thread page). They read him the riot act and I guess he wasn't too drunk or high to forget it, because things toned way way down after that.

Just a thought, mainly because the concern you express about an "incident" isn't something your league can handle without law enforcement.
 

moondog80

heart is two sizes two small
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Sep 20, 2005
5,124
slowstrung said:
You may want to consider calling your local police department and just explain everything you posted here. Obviously he has not done anything to the level of a crime, but tell them he has a criminal record and has been making you increasingly concerned. For one, they may have some decent advice on how to defuse any future situations, especially with all the kids present. For another, they may step up patrols near your parks/playing fields. Basically, it may not help, but certainly can't hurt.

I suggest this because I had a similar issue with a townhouse neighbor who was going beyond mere obnoxious behavior a few years ago. A 10 minute conversation with a sergeant was firstly a huge stress relief just to get the bad neighbor on their radar. Second, they did eventually patrol and see him pulling his act in the parking lot (I won't bother getting into the list of shit this guy pulled, it would fill a thread page). They read him the riot act and I guess he wasn't too drunk or high to forget it, because things toned way way down after that.

Just a thought, mainly because the concern you express about an "incident" isn't something your league can handle without law enforcement.
 
Thanks.  I don't know if I'm going to involve the police, but  fortunately the police station happens to be very close by the ballfield (this has already occurred to me).
 
The league is involved, not sure what action will be taken, but in the meantime someone within the league suggested the best way to deal with this in the future is to simply say "I'm sorry, but these decisions are made by the coaching staff with the entire roster in mind, not just one kid, and thus are not really a matter of discussion with parents".  And that's it.  No other explanation, not showing him my scorebook and how his kid hit higher than mine in every game an all that.  And he's 100% correct.  As much as my instinct is to offer the guy an explanation, just to be a decent guy but also to defend myself, I may as well be explaining the situation to houseplant.  Someone who is already down that road isn't going to hear it.
 

TrotWaddles

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Jan 23, 2004
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San Antonio, TX
Wow.  Reading through the thread sure brought back memories.  A few years separated from my last coaching season.  With three kids, I've spent more than 15 seasons as a soccer or basketball coach and the comments here about insane parents brought many things back.
 
Recently, I was able to pay a bit of it back.  My oldest is a HS senior doing college visits for swimming.  So I run her up to a small D3 school for an overnight visit last week to see the coach and the team.  There were a number of other prospective student/swimmers that all had both parents there.  The parents were apparently getting ready for some in-depth tour while kids would go off with team members.  The parents were all asking very in-depth questions about training and nutrition.  Blah blah blah.  At some point, you just have to let your kid get out and do their thing.  It's pretty apparent that helicopter parents do it throughout the kid's life.
 
I introduced myself to the coach.  He said "Are you doing the parents' tour?"  
 
"Nope." I replied.  "Look, my daughter is going to be an adult pretty soon.  You are running a program.  You decide if she can help your team (she probably could) and she will decide if I need to send money here.  Have a nice day.  I'll pick her up tomorrow."
 
A little smile and a look of gratitude got me started on my way home.
 

Omar's Wacky Neighbor

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What many parents still dont get is that coaches talk to each other.  We even have a "club" in town here, for coaches who've been called to task by this one particular family (and let me tell you, the club isnt all that exclusive).  At least once a season, you can count on the dad losing his cool over some perceived slight and feeling the need to address the "issue" with that year's coach.
 

robssecondjob

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Jul 18, 2005
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I was on the parent sideline at a soccer tournament this weekend watching a U13 boys group. 
 
Our team was playing a much more talented club that had not been scored upon the entire tournament.   My team falls solidly into the scrappy category.  More effort than raw skill.  We went up 2-0 on them (a set piece and a counter attack) and were playing them tough.  Generally a clean, hard fought match to that point.  Physical, with some fouls called, but fair play.  The parents of the opposing side were getting pretty restless at this point.  My defenders are pretty physically small and other teams tend to think they can push them around.  One of my defenders was really having his way with what was clearly their rock star.  Rock star is clearly frustrated.  His father yells.  "Get the elbows up into his heads, when he goes down the coach has to pull them for the head injury".
 
I couldn't believe they guy hollering for his kid to intentionally injury a player. The ref ejected the parent immediately and he was led away my tournament officials.  The kids son got a stern talking to from the ref as did the coach.  The player was fine.  He had done nothing wrong and didn't show any signs of doing anything wrong other than being frustrated.
 
 
We ended up losing 3-2 on a goal with under a minute to play.
 

Heinie Wagner

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Nov 14, 2001
669
Simsbury, CT
TrotWaddles said:
Wow.  Reading through the thread sure brought back memories.  A few years separated from my last coaching season.  With three kids, I've spent more than 15 seasons as a soccer or basketball coach and the comments here about insane parents brought many things back.
 
Recently, I was able to pay a bit of it back.  My oldest is a HS senior doing college visits for swimming.  So I run her up to a small D3 school for an overnight visit last week to see the coach and the team.  There were a number of other prospective student/swimmers that all had both parents there.  The parents were apparently getting ready for some in-depth tour while kids would go off with team members.  The parents were all asking very in-depth questions about training and nutrition.  Blah blah blah.  At some point, you just have to let your kid get out and do their thing.  It's pretty apparent that helicopter parents do it throughout the kid's life.
 
I introduced myself to the coach.  He said "Are you doing the parents' tour?"  
 
"Nope." I replied.  "Look, my daughter is going to be an adult pretty soon.  You are running a program.  You decide if she can help your team (she probably could) and she will decide if I need to send money here.  Have a nice day.  I'll pick her up tomorrow."
 
A little smile and a look of gratitude got me started on my way home.
 
That is truly awesome!  
 

TheYaz67

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May 21, 2004
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So, this story is from this past June.  Our local Little League Districts hosts (in addition to the All Star Tournaments) two "Fun Tournaments" for 8-10 and 10-12 year olds - it is just meant to be a nice way for kids that are not "All Star" quality to play some extra baseball in a similar tourney format if they are still around in June/early July after school is out.  So each league finds coaches and players and hastily throws together teams, and we all have to provide fields & umps to play the first few rounds, but eventually one league hosts the final week's games.
 
So one of our teams participating in the 8-10 tourney plays a game at a neighboring league's field, who is the "host" for the remaining games.  This other league also for this specific game were providing the umpires, which was a match up of our league v. another league (not the host).  So the mom of one of our players, whom I know all too well since I had her kid in Tee Ball and our kids were once on the same basketball team, ended up going batshit crazy mid-game yelling about the umpires concerning a play involving her son.   Now, important context here that she is one of those parents who both overlooks their child's athletic shortcomings (in this case her son is overweight and as a result slow) and in addition thinks they are much better than they actually are - so a dangerous combination.
 
She made such a scene, that the Tournament Director asked her to leave the field premises, which she reluctantly did.  Unfortunately, since she had to wait for her kid, she remained in the parking lot, then when the umpires were leaving the game she verbally and somewhat physically accosted their car in the parking lot, and to make matters worse, one of the umpires was a junior ump (so a young teen).  This resulted in a police report being filed, and our league receiving a letter the next morning from that league's president banning her from their fields in eternity.  We in turn told her that while her kids was welcome to continue to participate in the tourney, she could not attend any more of the games. 
 
The team's next game was that next day, and because they were already short players (one had to leave on a family trip, one was injured) they needed her son to show to have 9 players to play the game.  She of course did not contact the coach one way or the other, and did not show up, so the poor kids had to all drive over to the field and warm up hoping they could play, but had to instead forfeit the game (they were one of 4 or 5 teams left from a starting field of around 25 teams in a double elimination tourney) and got knocked out as a result.  Luckily she did not register her kid (who is actually fairly nice, but mom is crazy) for Fall Ball, but who knows if she will be back in the Spring, at which point we will have to decide about what to do about her participation at our league's games.... 
 

RIFan

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Jul 19, 2005
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Blackstone MA
Had an obviously hammered parent hanging right by our locker room door. He wreaked of alcohol and was carrying a cup full of booze. He started to give me shit on my way into the locker room because we upset their team. Same group of parents was giving crap to our players on the ice a few weeks ago.
 

Fred not Lynn

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Jul 13, 2005
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Having a bar at the rink that parents can watch from is a double edged sword. It keeps the parents out of the stands a bit, but then you get guys like this after...
 

Cumberland Blues

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I really can't think of anything good that can come from serving alcohol in close proximity to youth sports.  That's just asking for trouble.
 

RIFan

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It was a school rink with a no alcohol policy, so the guy brought his own in.  The game was between 13 and 14 yo's.  I can only imagine what his kid has to deal with since just about anything a parent does at that age embarrasses them.
 

Fred not Lynn

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Jul 13, 2005
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I figured it wasn't at the actual arena bar...but the arena I play in most does have a bar and grill (puts the beer in "beer league") that is also the snack bar. I've never actually seen any alcohol fueled parent incidents, but I'm not really there when that might happen. I do know that it's nice that the parents are in an enclosed space overlooking the rink  instead of right in the stands. 
 

Heinie Wagner

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Nov 14, 2001
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Simsbury, CT
Cumberland Blues said:
I really can't think of anything good that can come from serving alcohol in close proximity to youth sports.  That's just asking for trouble.
 
You could raise a boatload of money if you sold alcohol at our LL fields. Lots of Dads coming straight from work. 1-2 drinks might help, but more would absolutely be asking for trouble. You'd need a special roped off area where the drinkers would have to stay, close enough to the fields to see the action, but far enough away where they couldn't be heard, maybe behind plexi-glass. Now that I think of it, an area like that would be good for ALL the parents.
 

TheYaz67

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May 21, 2004
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Heinie Wagner said:
 
You could raise a boatload of money if you sold alcohol at our LL fields. Lots of Dads coming straight from work. 1-2 drinks might help, but more would absolutely be asking for trouble. You'd need a special roped off area where the drinkers would have to stay, close enough to the fields to see the action, but far enough away where they couldn't be heard, maybe behind plexi-glass. Now that I think of it, an area like that would be good for ALL the parents.
 
Well yes, except for LL Regulation XIV (Field Decorum) on page 44, which states:
 
(e) The possession of firearms and/or the use of tobacco, cigarettes (including e-cigarettes and vapors) and alcoholic beverages in any form is prohibited on the playing field, benches or dugouts.  Alcohol is prohibited at the game site.
 
I have noticed dads only a couple times violating this rule and had to say something (since I am the Chief Umpire for our league) - it tends to only be the parents of the travel ball kids that have done this, because they face no such prohibition I believe for their travel ball games on Sunday afternoons - they are not playing under LL rules in those cases.  Usually they wait until post game and maybe have just one with the coaches in the parking lot while the kids run around and they discuss what went down during the game, which is fine, I just don't want anyone drinking during the game/at the game site when I am umpiring, you know, the whole "lowering of inhibitions" effect of booze that would likely result in some worse than normal invective headed my way!
 

Doug Beerabelli

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I'll be into my fourth year of travel baseball coaching - not once have I seen any alcohol at a game.  I don't think it's allowed at our home field (open container rules), but haven't seen it anywhere.
 
Weekend tournaments back at the hotel are a different story, but that's once a season.
 

robssecondjob

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New season. New parents. Same old stories.

My U12 boys travel soccer team had a couple of new to town players make my team. Brazilian twins. They looked great in tryouts. I started practicing a couple of weeks ago and they have not shown up to a single practice. No notice they would not be there. I know I valid contact info as we have had several exchanges about birth certificates.

The club has reported they have not paid yet. No pay, no play. Our first game is this weekend. My son came home from school today and reported "they are only going to play in games. They have football practice so they can't make the soccer practice".

So they think it will be acceptable the very first time I even meet these players in person will be 30 minutes before a live game!!
 

BroodsSexton

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Feb 4, 2006
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New season. New parents. Same old stories.

My U12 boys travel soccer team had a couple of new to town players make my team. Brazilian twins. They looked great in tryouts. I started practicing a couple of weeks ago and they have not shown up to a single practice. No notice they would not be there. I know I valid contact info as we have had several exchanges about birth certificates.

The club has reported they have not paid yet. No pay, no play. Our first game is this weekend. My son came home from school today and reported "they are only going to play in games. They have football practice so they can't make the soccer practice".

So they think it will be acceptable the very first time I even meet these players in person will be 30 minutes before a live game!!
The answer to this is simple. Bring an American football to the game. When they show up, toss them the ball and tell them to go warm up.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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You could raise a boatload of money if you sold alcohol at our LL fields. Lots of Dads coming straight from work. 1-2 drinks might help, but more would absolutely be asking for trouble. You'd need a special roped off area where the drinkers would have to stay, close enough to the fields to see the action, but far enough away where they couldn't be heard, maybe behind plexi-glass. Now that I think of it, an area like that would be good for ALL the parents.
I can't lie. In our old place there was a fantastic rec league that began when kids turned 12 and ran through their junior year of high school. You would think that this would be too great an age range, but there were limits around who could be in the league (no one who had ever played varsity ball, no one who was playing travel above the age of 13) and who could pitch (no one over their sophomore year of HS). It was tremendous, just a bunch of kids who liked to play 2-3 times a week but didn't want to commit the time for a higher level. Of the 7 teams in the league, 4 played at this one, beautiful field at the top of a hill and the other three all played on nice fields.

Anyhoo.....there was a lot of parental drinking in the stands for that league, there were no issues (well, there were issues, but none were caused by drinking parents) and I have to admit, it was a ton of fun.
 

moondog80

heart is two sizes two small
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Sep 20, 2005
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I can't lie. In our old place there was a fantastic rec league that began when kids turned 12 and ran through their junior year of high school. You would think that this would be too great an age range, but there were limits around who could be in the league (no one who had ever played varsity ball, no one who was playing travel above the age of 13) and who could pitch (no one over their sophomore year of HS). It was tremendous, just a bunch of kids who liked to play 2-3 times a week but didn't want to commit the time for a higher level. Of the 7 teams in the league, 4 played at this one, beautiful field at the top of a hill and the other three all played on nice fields.

Anyhoo.....there was a lot of parental drinking in the stands for that league, there were no issues (well, there were issues, but none were caused by drinking parents) and I have to admit, it was a ton of fun.

I cringe at the idea of alcohol at little league games, but every one of those indoor sports complexes I've been to has a bar. So maybe I'm wrong?
 

Heinie Wagner

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Nov 14, 2001
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Simsbury, CT
New season. New parents. Same old stories.

My U12 boys travel soccer team had a couple of new to town players make my team. Brazilian twins. They looked great in tryouts. I started practicing a couple of weeks ago and they have not shown up to a single practice. No notice they would not be there. I know I valid contact info as we have had several exchanges about birth certificates.

The club has reported they have not paid yet. No pay, no play. Our first game is this weekend. My son came home from school today and reported "they are only going to play in games. They have football practice so they can't make the soccer practice".

So they think it will be acceptable the very first time I even meet these players in person will be 30 minutes before a live game!!
Do you have to play them? Seems entirely appropriate to let them and the parents know they won't play until they practice. Does your club have a policy on this? Sucks that people are such idiots. One thing I try to drive home in every preseason parent meeting is that practices are more important than games.
 

robssecondjob

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Jul 18, 2005
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Falmouth, MA
We have an attendance policy for our spring season, but the fall season is a little more casual. Until the league we are playing in instituted playoffs this season. I was hopeful to use the fall season working on some new formations as we now play the USSF 9 v 9 versus 8 v 8 previously and generally fixing some skills holes we had last year. At least the skills part is going well.

At this point I am hoping they don't pay and will not be allowed to play. That takes it out of my hands and makes it a club level issue. They have ignored all of the emails from the club to date. No need for them to know I am the guy who instituted the no pay - no play rule at the club level.

The worst case scenario is that they appear on the sideline this week, a road game about an hour away, and expect to play. I will end up being distracted by this issue and not focus on my players that are doing the right thing.
 

Omar's Wacky Neighbor

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And lemme guess: despite repeated email reminders and the notice in big honkin' letters on your home page and your registration page, they still havent ordered (nor paid for) their uniforms, but will expect to be issued unis just prior to this weekend's game.

We could start a rather entertaining new thread just for things said to coaches and admins in emails, or in the Comment/Suggestions section of registration sites. I particularly liked this parent's choice of the final two words:

Please don't forget to send me emails regarding all games and the practices without fail.

(does standing on this soapbox make me look taller?)
 
Last edited:

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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I cringe at the idea of alcohol at little league games, but every one of those indoor sports complexes I've been to has a bar. So maybe I'm wrong?
I think it has to be the right league. three years earlier the same son played in a league where there were parents who would stand in the parking lot (which was not league property but 20 feet from the field) and abuse the teenaged umps. It would have been really bad there.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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Please don't forget to send me emails regarding all games and the practices without fail.
Dear (parent name),

Internet legend "Rick Burlesons Yam Bag" has authorized me to tell you to go suck a dick. I don't know this for sure, but there is a decent chance that he is banging your mom. Also, we have practice tomorrow.

Yours,

(Your name here)
 

moondog80

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Sep 20, 2005
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I think it has to be the right league. three years earlier the same son played in a league where there were parents who would stand in the parking lot (which was not league property but 20 feet from the field) and abuse the teenaged umps. It would have been really bad there.
I guess at the indoor complexes, the fields are mostly out of viewing distance from bar. And the bartender has the ability to stop serving people, at least in theory. Maybe that's different than letting dad sit behind home plate with a 12 pack.
 
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Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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I guess the indoor complexes, the fields are mostly out of viewing distance from bar. And the bartender has the ability to stop serving people, at least in theory. Maybe that's different than letting dad sit behind home plate with a 12 pack.
I'm not a huge fan of indoor complexes for most sports as I think they are sterile and if a kid is anywhere near at risk of burnout then playing "not outdoors" regularly will exacerbate the feeling that they are on a grind. Obviously, there are exceptions for places that have blinding heat in the summer or which get snow in November, but generally I am a believer in being outside.

With that said.....one of the many reasons why this laid back attitude towards alcohol worked well was that it was self-policed. No one got shitfaced, no one was screaming at umpires or kids, it was more laid-back. By its very nature the league was not built to develop kids into pros or even college players, it was predominately there for kids who liked playing baseball but weren't travel/Varsity level. Maybe 10, 20 at most percent of the kids went on to play varsity in HS. While you would like to think that 99% of parents would be of the mindset that their kid has next to no chance of playing pro or D1, a shocking plurality don't accept that reality and push as they view appropriate. When you see your 13-16 year old kid standing at SS farting into his glove and putting it into the 2B's face and both of them laughing, your head is pretty well set.
 

Heinie Wagner

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[I said:
Please don't forget to send me emails regarding all games and the practices without fail.[/I]
It's nice to have software that does this for you. We use league athletics - while it's far from state of the art, it does a nice job with email and text reminders for anything you put on your schedule.

I get the sentiment though - some parents want to shun all responsibility and put it on the (volunteer) coaches to make sure parents know about games and practices.
 

robssecondjob

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I recently got an email from the parent of a player that did not make a Div 1 team and was placed on a Div 2 team asking for clarification of the results. I checked the tryouts scores and the coaches evals from last year and the placement of the player was accurate. Player was ranked at the very top of the Div 2 team. Player would be the first player called up in case of a season ending injury or player leaving the team. Over a season this almost always happens.

Unsurprisingly the parent was unmoved. The follow up email started with the ever popular "what makes you qualified to rate a player". Followed by "I am securing counsel and coming for you".

I am anxiously awaiting the next correspondence.
 

Doug Beerabelli

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The helicoptor rotors are at full speed. Jeesh.

My kid was in a similar position last year for soccer, and he was OK with it. I mentioned if he really wants to move up, he should work hard at improving, participate in as many activities as possible (winter indoor stuff), show coaches you want to move up. The age change thing helped, and he was asked to play up. He ended up not doing it because of conflicts with baseball in the spring, and stayed with the same team for this year, but I'm hoping it was a pretty good lesson for him.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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I recently got an email from the parent of a player that did not make a Div 1 team and was placed on a Div 2 team asking for clarification of the results. I checked the tryouts scores and the coaches evals from last year and the placement of the player was accurate. Player was ranked at the very top of the Div 2 team. Player would be the first player called up in case of a season ending injury or player leaving the team. Over a season this almost always happens.

Unsurprisingly the parent was unmoved. The follow up email started with the ever popular "what makes you qualified to rate a player". Followed by "I am securing counsel and coming for you".

I am anxiously awaiting the next correspondence.
He is securing counsel? Please note, I am not a lawyer, but I like to think that I am because I watch a lot of Perry Mason. I don't know what he can sue you for other than "gave me and my kid puffy titties."
 

robssecondjob

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I have been informed by a third party that he recorded the tryouts and is editing together a video demonstrating how his player is better than others. I look forward to receiving this piece of art. He would, of course, be qualified to note the difference in players.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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I have been informed by a third party that he recorded the tryouts and is editing together a video demonstrating how his player is better than others. I look forward to receiving this piece of art. He would, of course, be qualified to note the difference in players.
THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT JUDGE BERMAN!!!!!!!
 

Doug Beerabelli

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I have been informed by a third party that he recorded the tryouts and is editing together a video demonstrating how his player is better than others. I look forward to receiving this piece of art. He would, of course, be qualified to note the difference in players.
I hope the team has insurance that will pay for your defense. The lawyer will have a ball with defending that case.
 

loshjott

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I have been informed by a third party that he recorded the tryouts and is editing together a video demonstrating how his player is better than others. I look forward to receiving this piece of art. He would, of course, be qualified to note the difference in players.
Did he also record the hot moms of the other players that made Div 1? Depending on the judge, that will be a very compelling defense.
 

Heinie Wagner

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We had a coach kick a kid off a team last year. The kid bullied teammates, had tantrums on the court during games, did ridiculous celebrations when he made shots, but the bullying was the big thing. The kid was brutal to his teammates and didn't respond to repeated attempts by the coaches to modify his behavior.

The father said he'd have the media at my front door, this would be national news, he'd sue us, ruin our lives etc. His lawyer did send me an email (I'm the club President), not a legal note but as his lawyer and friend, asking if I could override the coach and put the kid back on the team and comparing how this kid treated his teammates to how Michael Jordan treated his inferior teammates. A lawyer actually used words like that - calling 7th graders inferior.

Fortunately, other than that letter and the father promising me that I had made an "enemy for life", nothing came of it.
 

Old Fart Tree

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We had a coach kick a kid off a team last year. The kid bullied teammates, had tantrums on the court during games, did ridiculous celebrations when he made shots, but the bullying was the big thing. The kid was brutal to his teammates and didn't respond to repeated attempts by the coaches to modify his behavior.

The father said he'd have the media at my front door, this would be national news, he'd sue us, ruin our lives etc. His lawyer did send me an email (I'm the club President), not a legal note but as his lawyer and friend, asking if I could override the coach and put the kid back on the team and comparing how this kid treated his teammates to how Michael Jordan treated his inferior teammates. A lawyer actually used words like that - calling 7th graders inferior.

Fortunately, other than that letter and the father promising me that I had made an "enemy for life", nothing came of it.
Jesus Christ.
 

robssecondjob

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Did he also record the hot moms of the other players that made Div 1? Depending on the judge, that will be a very compelling defense.
The player in question's mom is decidedly above replacement level. Not a player that would end up on my team though.

And we have insurance and my team looks like a variant of SOSH with lawyer's everyplace.
 

TheYaz67

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Yeah, we had a kid a few years ago that had similar bullying/threatening issues (this was younger kids, like 9/10 year olds) with his teammates, and despite many issues to deal with it the behavior did not change, so the Board voted to "suspend" the player for the remainder of the season. Dad was a lawyer in the AF, and threatened to sue us up and down since he did not see it the same way.

Of course nothing every came of that threat, in part because I assume he stepped back and realized that we followed our own written procedures for this kind of thing (and parents have to affirm upon registration that they & their kids will abide by the rules and disciplinary procedures) and it was a "voluntary activity". I think he was a Major, and of course the Air Force Colonel who served on our Board at the time was less than impressed, but could not lean on the guy due to that whole "unlawful command authority" issue or whatever, but he was prepared to go over the guy's head to the top officer in the AF JAG office, since he was extremely well connected inside the Pentagon, but thankfully it never came to that.

Also the optics of suing your local community sports leagues because your kid is an ass are not great, career wise, so most such threats seem to amount to nothing....
 

h8mfy

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Jul 15, 2005
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Although it was not precipitated by a sports decision, the statement above about an "enemy for life" brings to mind the story in the link below, about vengeful parents...you need to be careful, not everyone would be lucky enough to have this happen in a place like Irvine, where there are good cops with not a lot to do

http://www.latimes.com/projects/la-me-framed/
 

robssecondjob

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Another parent email.

Due a numbers crunch we ended up expanding the rosters on a couple of our Div 1 teams. The Div 2 teams were eliminated due to lack of players. Not all of the Div 1 coaches were thrilled having extra players added to their rosters. One of them sent an introductory email to him his team and made the statement that it is a big roster and playing time will need to be earned and that it will not be even time. If you have a problem let me know and we can discuss it and bring club officials in if required.

No surprise he got a response: "Please email before all road games if my son will be playing or not. We are not driving to the game if he isn't playing".