Why Do I Continue to Read Peter King?

[Humphrey]

 
fWIW--they had the system (a system, anyway) in '67, but it failed.

...which is why they should have postponed the game a day or two- they had 2 weeks before the Super Bowl, the Super Bowl wasn't a big deal then anyway.    IIRC the next day was in the balmy 20s.

 

[Corsi]

On the plus side, he's finally admitted that his column arrives in chunks


Hmm, he's probably not eating enough bran.

 

[Corsi]

Talked to the new Buccaneers coach for my podcast this week (it will be up late Tuesday), and he tried to educate me about the real way football is played today. I said to him with so many three- and four-wide formations in the pro game now (most teams are playing three-plus wides more than half the snaps), it makes no sense to me to run off Revis, who is set to make a non-guaranteed $16 million in 2014 if the Bucs keep him. Smith agreed.
 

:barf:  :barf:  :barf:  :barf:  :barf:

 

[Corsi]

Finally, no mention of Kluwe or anything.  He will, of course, wait until the team makes an official announcement regarding the investigation and then piggy-back on whatever their line is.  Coward.

 
Nailed it.
 

ON KLUWE AND THE VIKINGS. I certainly won’t be alone in bringing up this startling omission. Most of us fans are far too removed from the intricacies of the NFL inner circles to be able to form a reasonable opinion regarding Chris Kluwe’s trustworthiness relating to his incendiary accusations. I respect that you are unwilling to offer knee jerk reactions on such serious matters, but your loyal readers deserve to hear from you on this topic. What say you, good sir?
 
—Mike, Ann Arbor, Mich.
 
Here’s what I say: a few days ago on Twitter when the story broke, I praised Kluwe for his willingness to be so critical of people who he had worked so closely with. I also said in response to a question on Twitter, that in my experience, Kluwe had been nothing but truthful with me, to the best of my knowledge. In an explosive case like this, I do regret not addressing this in the column Monday. I should have. What I would have said is that I applaud Kluwe for writing what he wrote, and I also applaud the Vikings for appointing two independent authorities to investigate it. I do not know if the special teams coach, Mike Priefer, said those exact comments. I do not know Priefer. I do know Kluwe. And as I said, I’ve never known Kluwe to lie. So let’s let the light of truth shine on this story, and see what happens.

 

[Reverend]

:barf:  :barf:  :barf:  :barf:  :barf:

 
This is really profoundly Kingian: he's talking to an NFL coach, makes mention of said coach trying to educate him about football, and then tells us what he, Peter King, told the coach.
 
Peter King is a guy who would give Larry Bird pointers on how to shoot a basketball.

 

[Reverend]

That tidbit also illustrates another criticism of King: he has all of this access, and does nothing with it.  What did Fouts say?  Why do we care?
 
I've always gotten the impression that he talks to a TON of players/coaches/execs around the league, but for his own edification/ego-boosting.  He is not acting on behalf of his readers.

 
How many people who know who Dan Fouts is don't know who Peter King is? I think there is a non-negligible chance this gentleman was trolling King in person. Which would be awesome.

 

[johnmd20]

 
How many people who know who Dan Fouts is don't know who Peter King is? I think there is a non-negligible chance this gentleman was trolling King in person. Which would be awesome.

 
I would say I see PK at least once a week, usually more. I always try to be polite and kind around him. However, he is not an affable or social person and I often don't even get a response out of him when I say good morning or good afternoon or whatever. He just grunts. In my opinion, he isn't worth trolling.
 
But he's always wearing sweats. Always. And seeing him in the gym is quite an experience. That only happened once but it is seared in my memory. There are some things you can't unsee.

 

[Import78]

 
I would say I see PK at least once a week, usually more. I always try to be polite and kind around him. However, he is not an affable or social person and I often don't even get a response out of him when I say good morning or good afternoon or whatever. He just grunts. In my opinion, he isn't worth trolling.
 
But he's always wearing sweats. Always. And seeing him in the gym is quite an experience. That only happened once but it is seared in my memory. There are some things you can't unsee.

 
 
Is this your way of saying you live in Manhattan?

 

[joyofsox]

I do not follow the NFL, but I do enjoy this thread a lot. My wish is that he somehow becomes aware of its existence.
 

 

[ifmanis5]

I do not follow the NFL, but I do enjoy this thread a lot. My wish is that he somehow becomes aware of its existence.
 

Yeah, I'm sure he'd be super psyched to read 72 pages on how he's a fat lazy blowhard coward.

 

[Reverend]

Yeah, I'm sure he'd be super psyched to read 72 pages on how he's a fat lazy blowhard coward.

 
With an inflated sense of self-worth. That's the key. If he were the other things without that, he'd just be a jerk. It's that sense of entitlement that vaults him to an elevated state of douche.

 

[ifmanis5]

With an inflated sense of self-worth. That's the key. If he were the other things without that, he'd just be a jerk. It's that sense of entitlement that vaults him to an elevated state of douche.

I don't get this way too often- but I'm typing this comment on an applebox under a Miley Cyrus photo.

 

[Corsi]

GET THE INSIDE SUPER BOWL SCOOP: ENJOY LUNCH FOR 4 WITH PETER KING OF SPORTS ILLUSTRATED IN NJ ON JANUARY 29, 2014
 
Get the Inside Scoop on the 2014 Super Bowl! Enjoy lunch for four on Wednesday, January 29, 2014 (just prior to the Super Bowl) in New Jersey with Peter King of Sports Illustrated. You and three friends will have a private luncheon where you can get an insider look at all the story lines leading up to the biggest game of the year. Peter is an expert on the NFL and author of Monday Morning Quarterback and the MMQB website.
 
Current Bid: $500.00 (1 bid)
Estimated Value: $3,000.00
 

https://www.charitybuzz.com/catalog_items/458400

 

[Ferm Sheller]

 
This is really profoundly Kingian: he's talking to an NFL coach, makes mention of said coach trying to educate him about football, and then tells us what he, Peter King, told the coach.
 
Peter King is a guy who would give Larry Bird pointers on how to shoot a basketball.

 
 
Better yet, Michael Jordan how to dunk.

 

[Leather]

Estimated value: $3,000?!
 
Let's assume each lunch is worth $100 (which I posit is probably about 50% more than what it will actually be worth).  So King's presence is valued at $2,600 an hour?  And is there any doubt whatsoever that King will be going "Oh, excuse me one second...." and checking his phone/tweeting every five minutes?

 

[Bucknahs Bum Ankle]

Oh man, there's just gotta be 4 SoSHers who could get in on this!  Not me, but I'd be willing to throw a little dough toward the cause.

 

[mpx42]

Estimated value: $3,000?!
 
Let's assume each lunch is worth $100 (which I posit is probably about 50% more than what it will actually be worth).  So King's presence is valued at $2,600 an hour?  And is there any doubt whatsoever that King will be going "Oh, excuse me one second...." and checking his phone/tweeting every five minutes?

 
$100? You don't think the luncheon'll be sandwiches from Starbucks?

 

[ifmanis5]

Deadspin has to be all over this. They've got to have $3,000 kicking around somewhere to troll him for a few hours. I wonder if he dines in sweat pants?

 

[mascho]

We have to make this happen.  I've always wanted to see an Applebee's in New Jersey.  

 

[Corsi]

No doubt King will eat the sixth spring roll.

 

[joe dokes]

We have to make this happen.  I've always wanted to see an Applebee's in New Jersey.  

 
I hear the beer selection is off the charts.

 

[Wade Boggs Hair]

Estimated value: $3,000?!

 
He normally dines in Manhattan - where he lives, you know - so the value accounts for the inconvenience/slumming it in New Jersey.

 

[cromulence]

 
 
Is this your way of saying you live in Manhattan?

 
I took it more as being his way of saying he's seen Peter King naked......ew.

 

[pappymojo]

 
He normally dines in Manhattan - where he lives, you know - so the value accounts for the inconvenience/slumming it in New Jersey.

Since the winning bidders also have to travel to Jersey though, shouldn't that reduce the estimated value?

 

[Morning Woodhead]

Still Sucks.  Edelman was a 7th round pick.
 
Position Player No. of plays Stats How acquired
 
WR Julian Edelman 68 6 catches, 84 yards Undrafted Kent State option QB, 2009
TE Michael Hoomanawanui 74 1 catch, 7 yards Signed after being cut by Rams, 2012
RB LeGarrette Blount 28 24 carries, 166 yards, 4 TDs Acquired for RB Jeff Demps, 2013
FB James Develin 35 1 carry, 0 yards Undrafted Brown. U DE, 2013
 
edit - formatting  

 

[joe dokes]

Still Sucks.  Edelman was a 7th round pick.
 
Position Player No. of plays Stats How acquired
 
WR Julian Edelman 68 6 catches, 84 yards Undrafted Kent State option QB, 2009
TE Michael Hoomanawanui 74 1 catch, 7 yards Signed after being cut by Rams, 2012
RB LeGarrette Blount 28 24 carries, 166 yards, 4 TDs Acquired for RB Jeff Demps, 2013
FB James Develin 35 1 carry, 0 yards Undrafted Brown. U DE, 2013
 
edit - formatting  

 
 
Pats also gave up a 7th rounder for Blount. Which would make an interesting bookend to Edelman's drafting -- IF he had mentioned Edelman was a 7th round pick. Not as interesting as the elasticity of the shower caps at the Denver Hilton, but interesting nevertheless.

 

[Senator Donut]

b. Such a loyal guy, that Robert Gates.

c. … he said, dripping with sarcasm.

Leave it to Peter King to Roethlisberger his own joke.

 

[Leather]

There's also some unintended irony in King lamenting the fact that people pay so much attention to Dennis Rodman, who is only relevant so long as people like King talk about him.
 
Otherwise, it was just a typically boring column, complete with some vague bragging ("Hey, I flew from NYC to L.A. to Seattle...and each place has different weather!  Fancy that!") and insipid travel notes ("I went to the ORIGINAL starbucks!  They make coffee by HAND!").

 

[Corsi]

There's also some unintended irony in King lamenting the fact that people pay so much attention to Dennis Rodman, who is only relevant so long as people like King talk about him.
 
Otherwise, it was just a typically boring column, complete with some vague bragging ("Hey, I flew from NYC to L.A. to Seattle...and each place has different weather!  Fancy that!") and insipid travel notes ("I went to the ORIGINAL starbucks!  They make coffee by HAND!").

 
The self-appointed Coffee Nerd called the portafilter a "pod."  That made my day. 

 

[inJacobyWeTrust]

Those are fighting words buddy. I don't stand for anyone dissing my fair city.. You want to step outside so we can settle this man to man? LOL Seriously despite it's rep, there are some fine parts of the city and as Dr. Leather mentioned the pizza is out of this world. 

 
Once on a golf team trip in college we were piling into our van to go get some of the famous pizza you mentioned and saw a hooker getting boned in the parking lot of our hotel, in broad daylight. That must not have been a fine part of the lovely city.

 

[joe dokes]

he's coreected the Edelman entry.
 

Thanks for your advice last week about how to clean a coffeemaker. Turns out a couple cups of white vinegar and water, cycled through the process with a pause in the middle to let the vinegar mix work, and then two cycles of water running through the machine, did the trick just as you said. (You too, Nancy Gay.) So thanks for the good old virtual community advice.
 

 
1. Is there anyone who drinks as much coffee as he does that does *not* know that you clean a coffemaker with vinegar and water?
 
2. He should bookmark IcanBingthatforyou.com

 

[loshjott]

he's coreected the Edelman entry.
 
 
1. Is there anyone who drinks as much coffee as he does that does *not* know that you clean a coffemaker with vinegar and water?
 
2. He should bookmark IcanBingthatforyou.com

 
When you live in Manhattan you go out for coffee. Making your own coffee is for little people.

 

[Corsi]

King is so full of shit, it's sickening.

LUCK IMMUNE TO CRITICISM? I understand that everyone believes Andrew Luck is the future of the NFL, but does that make him immune from criticism? Dalton throws three picks in his past two playoff games and every website is flooded with commentary. Luck throws seven picks in his past two playoff games and there isn’t an article about it, or even a negative comment in yours. I understand Luck might turn out to be the greatest of all-time, but what has he done to earn the kid gloves treatment? A bunch of fourth-quarter wins signify a quarterback who doesn’t give up, but they also signify a quarterback who didn’t play well in the first three quarters.
 
—John
 
You bring up some good points. We probably tend to give highly drafted, multiple-tool players more of the benefit of the doubt than players who entered the draft with some deficiencies. 
 

 
 

 

 

[Leather]

King doesn't want to burn any bridges with Luck.  I mean, it's clear as fucking day. 
 
He doesn't give a shit about Newton or Dalton, likely because in the case of the former, Newton doesn't give a shit about King, and in the case of the latter, King doesn't think Dalton will be around for much longer.

 

[coremiller]

His "TEN THINGS I’LL BE WATCHING FOR THIS WEEKEND", before the best Championship Weekend in recent memory, includes the following:
 
4. The weather (not expected to be a factor in either game)
5. Something I couldn't follow in which he takes passive-aggressive potshots at radio hosts who say mean things about Peyton Manning
6. Gronkowski (not playing)
7. Gossip about Miami and Tampa GM searches
8. Gossip about concussion lawsuit
9. Gossip about Johnny Manziel buzz
10. Gossip about the redskins changing their nickname.
 
Really, before two of the best championship game matchups we've seen in a long time, he couldn't come up with more than 3 things about the actual games to look forward to?  I'm not a professional football writer, and I could come up with 10 matchups to watch for in these games off the top of my head in about 30 seconds.

 

[JimD]

Urbane Manhattanites like King are above such pedestrian matters as conference championship games.

 

[Leather]

He's a company man.

 

[Leather]

I've been drinking... But not heavily, and just looking at that crap has made me want to write to Joe Posnanski, just to say "thanks".

 

[Corsi]

Lead-in paragraph to today's MMQB:
 

You've heard the story tons of times by now, but that doesn't make it any less spectacular. Twenty-two months ago, Peyton Manning came to Denver, not knowing how, or if, his tale would continue. Now he prepares to take over the Big Apple, one win away from winning that elusive second Lombardi. Now he prepares to stared down the locquacious Richard Sherman, who made headlines of his own Sunday, and the Seahawks.

 
If you're going to use big words, at least spell them correctly.   I mean, this error is in the first paragraph, in bigger font than the rest of the column.  If your editor can't find this mistake, then why even have an editor?

 

[Corsi]

2. The AFC media hotel over the weekend was the classic 122-year-old Brown Palace Hotel. Six presidents have stayed here. And The Beatles. And I thought: I have been here before. I was … 32 years ago, when the now-defunct Rocky Mountain News brought me in for a job interview when I worked in Cincinnati. Very cool place, with a big atrium lobby and a grand staircase up from the lobby to all floors. Thirty-two years. That’s the record between stays at a hotel for me.

 
Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the Brown Palace Hotel, the home-away-from-home for many world-renowned dignitaries, including:
 
Former United States Presidents...
 

 
The Beatles...
 

 
...and a young Peter King.
 

 

[Corsi]

b. Of course, one of the highlights during the game was noticing the back of No. 24 for the Avalanche: CLICHE. A forward. Marc-Andre Cliche, from Quebec. So, brilliant me, I’m at the game with our Robert Klemko and his girlfriend, and Cliche goes into the penalty box, and I say, “Cliché in the sin bin! How perfect is that!”
 

 
Doesn't even make sense.

 

[DJnVa]

Maybe he's saying that hacktastic writers use cliches and they belong in the sin bin for using them, or that....oh, what the fuck. I have no clue.

 

[Corsi]

h. Russell Wilson usually takes care of the ball. That first-quarter fumble could have been very costly.

 


2013 Fumble Leaders
1 Matthew Stafford QB Det: 12
2 Robert Griffin III QB Was: 11
3 Russell Wilson QB Sea: 10

 

 

[Leather]

I am not even going to look at his column for a few weeks.  Can't bear it.

 

[wade boggs chicken dinner]

 

https://www.charitybuzz.com/catalog_items/458400

 

 
currently only 7 bids; high bid is $1700.  wouldn't it be fun to have lunch with him and ask him about the list of errors pointed out in this thread?

 

[Reverend]

 
currently only 7 bids; high bid is $1700.  wouldn't it be fun to have lunch with him and ask him about the list of errors pointed out in this thread?

 
Why haven't any of our Jersey peeps initiated a Kickstarter for this? If it got any traction at all, I bet Deadspin would pick it up in a motherfucking cocaine heartbeat.

 

[coremiller]

 
1. The Minneapolis airport hit a symphonic home run Thursday afternoon. As I was passing through connecting for a flight to Denver, a woman played a harp. Beautifully, I might add. “Ode to Joy,” I think.
 

 
How much do you want to bet that the harp player was not playing "Ode to Joy", but that "Ode to Joy" is the only classical piece that PK knows the name of, so he just dropped that in to make himself sound more sophisticated?

 

[Leather]

"Ode to Joy...I think."
 
Either you know what Ode to Joy sounds like, or you don't.   Either way,  he's a fucking philistine.

 

[Reverend]

"Ode to Joy...I think."
 
Either you know what Ode to Joy sounds like, or you don't.   Either way,  he's a fucking philistine.

 
. . .
 
Yes.

 

[Skeesix]

"Ode to Joy...I think."
 
Either you know what Ode to Joy sounds like, or you don't.   Either way,  he's a fucking philistine.


Pretty much. Ode to joy is probably the most well-known piece of music in human history.