Worst Ref Stories

Heinie Wagner

Member
SoSH Member
Nov 14, 2001
729
Simsbury, CT
you hadn't screamed at a player in 8 years?????

I haven't seen a coach go 8 minutes without screaming.
LOL. I've never screamed at a player. This winter will be my 10th winter coaching hoops with a bunch of spring/fall/summer seasons thrown in too. Girls and boys 4th grade up to HS varsity level.

As a player I saw guys become totally useless when they got screamed at. I'm talking about guys who were all-state players, guys 6'8"+ 220lbs+ turned into completely non-productive basketball players from coaches yelling at them. Coaches they could have absolutely destroyed in any kind of physical confrontation.

It's totally insane that in any other facet of life, a classroom, a job or whatever, it would be totally unacceptable to treat people like that, especially kids, but for some crazy reason, it's ok in sports. Imagine a junior HS teacher screaming and swearing at kids? Fired! But a sports coach? Perfectly acceptable. Crazy.

It's also stupid because there are better ways to motivate kids and people in general, than by screaming at them. If you can't control your emotions, you shouldn't be coaching kids.
 

bsj

Renegade Crazed Genius
SoSH Member
Dec 6, 2003
21,165
Central NJ SoSH Chapter
you hadn't screamed at a player in 8 years?????

I haven't seen a coach go 8 minutes without screaming.

LOL. I've never screamed at a player. This winter will be my 10th winter coaching hoops with a bunch of spring/fall/summer seasons thrown in too. Girls and boys 4th grade up to HS varsity level.

As a player I saw guys become totally useless when they got screamed at. I'm talking about guys who were all-state players, guys 6'8"+ 220lbs+ turned into completely non-productive basketball players from coaches yelling at them. Coaches they could have absolutely destroyed in any kind of physical confrontation.

It's totally insane that in any other facet of life, a classroom, a job or whatever, it would be totally unacceptable to treat people like that, especially kids, but for some crazy reason, it's ok in sports. Imagine a junior HS teacher screaming and swearing at kids? Fired! But a sports coach? Perfectly acceptable. Crazy.

It's also stupid because there are better ways to motivate kids and people in general, than by screaming at them. If you can't control your emotions, you shouldn't be coaching kids.
Like i said. 8 years NEVER raised my voice. But I had this one 15 year old kid who every freaking practice was the biggest irritant. Every game complained about something, my game management, his playing time, whatever. At one point late season i hit my limit. He's a good player, not a great player, but a good player. My 2nd best point guard. But not my best. My best is a kid who is a point guard on the travel team and wins games. So he starts. Because of the way my league rules are, everyone plays half the game in a rotation, so I need my 2nd best point guard on the 2nd unit. Its not about "starting" in this setup. Anyway, pre game, my best PG isnt there. 10 min before game time, I am writing out my lineups, and I am forced to move this kid to start because the other team has a deadly PG and I cant put my 3rd emergency PG in against him. Then, my starting PG walks in (car issues). So I was able to reset my rotation. Backup PG goes off "What the F*** I was here first he just gets to walk in and starts..."... Now mind you, i have NEVER made it about who comes first. We'd have some terrible lineups if I did that. I mean if the game starts and you arent there you clearly arent starting, but I make it about the rotations we need and I revise up until i submit the lineups. And this was like the 5th week in a row this kid made a scene over something, and this happened on the court on front of the team, creating a f'd up dynamic at the very start of the game so i snapped and shouted at him "I have NEVER set the rotation based on who comes first. Every GD game you complain about something! Just play where I put you!"

Anyway, I hated myself for doing that, (the 1 or 2 times in my life I yelled at my kids I felt equally bad)and the next practice I pulled him aside and told him i was out of line for raising my voice, and explained to him that while I understood his frustration, we both need to handle things better, blah blah blah....we made it through the last couple of games of the season, but that was another key cog in me walking away
 
Last edited:

BJBossman

lurker
Dec 6, 2016
271
LOL. I've never screamed at a player. This winter will be my 10th winter coaching hoops with a bunch of spring/fall/summer seasons thrown in too. Girls and boys 4th grade up to HS varsity level.

As a player I saw guys become totally useless when they got screamed at. I'm talking about guys who were all-state players, guys 6'8"+ 220lbs+ turned into completely non-productive basketball players from coaches yelling at them. Coaches they could have absolutely destroyed in any kind of physical confrontation.

It's totally insane that in any other facet of life, a classroom, a job or whatever, it would be totally unacceptable to treat people like that, especially kids, but for some crazy reason, it's ok in sports. Imagine a junior HS teacher screaming and swearing at kids? Fired! But a sports coach? Perfectly acceptable. Crazy.

It's also stupid because there are better ways to motivate kids and people in general, than by screaming at them. If you can't control your emotions, you shouldn't be coaching kids.
I will say, my favorite coach of all time...the one I wrote my college entrance essay about.

he was a brutal screamer.

I hated it for the longest time. Until I was a senior and noticed how much better I was than when i first started playing for him as a sophomore.

the adversity I went through playing for him...that i never would've gotten through if he didn't push me.

but you definitely couldn't get away with that these days (and I graduated HS in the 2000s).
 

BJBossman

lurker
Dec 6, 2016
271
My wife still refers to it as my "coaching voice".

(not screaming, but projecting, so that I can be heard two fields away)
loud is one thing.

but yeah, screaming is something else. How parents let their kids, especially like 10 and 11 year olds get verbally abused like that....baffling.

I mean, that's their problem, not mine, unless they use inappropriate language.
 

Heinie Wagner

Member
SoSH Member
Nov 14, 2001
729
Simsbury, CT
I will say, my favorite coach of all time...the one I wrote my college entrance essay about.

he was a brutal screamer.

I hated it for the longest time. Until I was a senior and noticed how much better I was than when i first started playing for him as a sophomore.

the adversity I went through playing for him...that i never would've gotten through if he didn't push me.

but you definitely couldn't get away with that these days (and I graduated HS in the 2000s).
My HS and college coaches were screamers and I loved them like second fathers. I'd say 8 or 9 out of 10 other guys hated them. Looking back I can see how they totally wasted some of the talent in the players they had because they screamed so much (and hired assistants who did too).

They would have been better coaches and had better teams if they would have screamed less, and particularly at some players. It wasn't like they made a conscious decision to be screamers, they just couldn't control their emotions and probably never tried because they didn't see the value in it.
 

LoweTek

Well-Known Member
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
May 30, 2005
1,882
Central Florida
Best coach I ever had (HS Hockey) was a screamer. He tended to yell at the whole team though as opposed to any individual. He yelled at me once. He was pissed off about losing the game and he turned to me still screaming to tell me I would be in the net for the following game, the season finally against our biggest rival. As a baseball coach I do the loud projecting voice thing but rarely directed at a single player except to remind him of a backup assignment or something similar.