Dan Shaughnessy: Taking a dump in your mouth one column at a time

wutang112878

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I got lured into reading his Lackey column today because I was wondering if Lackey was going to be CHBs new chubby pitcher to crap on now that Schilling is gone. I actually thought it was a fair article without any attacks on him, amazing what he can do when he tries and is fair.

Unfortunately, he also had to say:
Oh, and let’s not forget that sun-starved stat geeks insist wins are overrated.
So many ways to rip that apart, but it just shows how stuck in his ways this idiot is.
 

John Marzano Olympic Hero

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Also consider that the quote Lackey gives at the end of the piece pretty much agrees with the sun-starved stat geeks insist.
 

mikepnq

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"He put a ton of guys on base and got a lot of wins because the Sox offense gave him plenty of support when he pitched."

This is the sentence RIGHT BEFORE the dig at stat geeks. Right before it. That's pretty infuriating.
 

joyofsox

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Peter Abraham: "Congrats to Dan, by the way. He was named was one the 10 best columnists for newspapers with a circulation over 175,000 by the Associated Press Sports Editors)"

What I take away from this is that there exist 10 or fewer columnists for newspapers with a circulation over 175,000.
 

Tartan

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"He put a ton of guys on base and got a lot of wins because the Sox offense gave him plenty of support when he pitched."

This is the sentence RIGHT BEFORE the dig at stat geeks. Right before it. That's pretty infuriating.
At this point, he's just being dick for the hell of it. Useless cheap shots like that have long been par for the course with Shaughnessy, no matter who he's targeting.
 

Brianish

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SI has an example up today of what happens when Danny boy uses his powers for good:

Boston's Joe Mooney was one of the more notorious lawn mower men in the AL. Mooney first worked for the Senators and Redskins at old RFK (where he remembers standing around the batting cage between Vince Lombardi and Ted Williams) and came to the Red Sox back in the days when he was still nimble enough to throw batting practice to young Carl Yastrzemski.

Mooney guarded Fenway's turf like it was the Mona Lisa. He'd kick anybody off the field. It didn't matter if you were a yahoo fan on a tour, or Reggie Jackson. But the old salts loved him. Don Zimmer came to Fenway as a member of the Rangers, Yankees and Rays and he always asked for Mooney as soon as he got to the park.
It's a nice little piece about the guys who keep the fields running, brought on when he found out Ernie Tyler had died. I was stunned.

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2011/writers/dan_shaughnessy/02/21/baseballs.unsung/index.html
 
Beautifully conceived and written piece about Yaz -- which makes his asshattery all the more annoying.

http://www.boston.com/sports/baseball/redsox/articles/2011/03/16/out_of_spotlight_yastrzemski_stays_in_game_his_way/
The only time I read his stuff is when somebody provides a link and recommends the piece - and thank you for doing so. The Shank gave great insight to Yaz's peculiar (yet happy) baseball afterlife. Nice job, douchebag. I wish you'd write like this more often.
 

JohntheBaptist

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I can't believe I'm about to say this.

I just sent my Mom the Yaz article too--he was her mother's favorite player, and her mother died on St Pat's two years ago. She loved it and it totally made her day.

Um. Ahem. Thanks... Dan.
 

Royal Rooter

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I found it highly comical that in the same week that Bruce Jenkins embarrassed himself with his "mother's basement" comment and was ridiculed for it, Shank dropped this gem in his column this morning: "...or one of the pudding-eating, basement-dwelling blog boys who'd normally be tracking UZR or NFL fantasy teams."

Also think its pretty ironic that he dropped today's column about the "hypocrisy and corruption" of the NCAA tournament on us about 6 hours after Schilling tweeted this: "Worst beat guy? tie, CHB, George King, bitter dudes who were doing jobs they clearly hated doing about people they clearly didn't like."
 

Hendu for Kutch

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"...or one of the pudding-eating, basement-dwelling blog boys who'd normally be tracking UZR or NFL fantasy teams."
Do the mathematically inclined really eat more pudding? I never realized that. Perhaps I'll grab a snack pack and crunch the numbers.

And the fantasy teams comment? Does he realize that most players actually do fantasy sports? At this point I'd find someone more odd if they DIDN'T have a fantasy team in at least one sport.
 

John Marzano Olympic Hero

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As someone who doesn't really have a problem with Shaughnessy anymore, today's column was just a bitter fuck you bile of crap.

Basically he said, "I don't like the NCAA tourney any more and if you do, you're a moron."

It was just crap.
 

weeba

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And surprise, Callahan was defending that article today. Said it was a better article and more accessible than Bob Ryan's piece on Sunday.
 

John Marzano Olympic Hero

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What makes it "more accessible" than Ryan's article? Was it because it was on the front page of the sports section?
 

dcmissle

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The SI cover Yaz comments on in the article.
OT, thanks for this awesome contribution.

Tony C. in the on deck circle, a week before his life took a tragic turn, is chilling and enough to make a grown RS fan cry.

No baseball player in my lifetime, with the possible exception of Pete Rose, got as much from his physical gifts (and limitations) as YAZ. Certainly no one worked harder. YAZ is absolutely ripped in this picture, which was taken after his transformative offseason, and yet still under 200 pounds. He was a trail blazer in the right way, rejecting the conventional wisdom that weight training would bind you up, and when he showed up for ST in "67, his teammates were astonished.
 

weeba

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What makes it "more accessible" than Ryan's article? Was it because it was on the front page of the sports section?
They both were on the front page I think, next to each other if I remember correctly. His thought was that less people would care about the George Mason (?) player (because who has heard of George Mason) and that Shaughnessy's article spoke to more people, as during NCAA time, people pretend to like college basketball and it was about time someone called them out on it.

Iggy and Meter both said they enjoyed Ryan's article more, and that all Shanks was doing was baiting. Which Callahan said was the sign of a good columnist, to get people to talk.
 

CantKeepmedown

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I loved Callahan's response, after Iggy had stated that he's read this type of stuff before......."No you haven't. This has not been written about before." Really, Gerry?
 

weeba

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God I forgot about this line

You won’t find anyone unless you live next door to Bob Ryan, my boss Joe Sullivan, or one of the pudding-eating, basement-dwelling blog boys who’d normally be tracking UZR or NFL fantasy teams
 

MN Dirt Dog

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It has this line in it:



So yea.
Of course it does. Just about every World Series can be 'tainted' since the early 1980's.

Manny's a dumbass for getting caught a second time after the drug-testing program's been instituted, but this whole "tainted championships" thing is just the media whining.

I only came here to say that Shaughnessy's annoying me for no particular reason today on Gresh & Zo, but I saw this and was more inspired to respond to it rather than anything Shaughnessy was saying.


 

JimBoSox9

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Classic CHB crap today. Leads off with "speculation swirling" that Lucchino and Werner would leave to take over the Dodgers. Follows that with getting emphatic denials from the both of them. Want to bet that the only place that speculation swirled was an inch under a badly-styled curly mop of hair?
 

Jackson

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Classic CHB crap today. Leads off with "speculation swirling" that Lucchino and Werner would leave to take over the Dodgers. Follows that with getting emphatic denials from the both of them. Want to bet that the only place that speculation swirled was an inch under a badly-styled curly mop of hair?
You're correct. 100% shit-stirring from the all-time greatest shit-stirrer.
 

Huntington Avenue Grounds

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Wasn't CHB one of the loudest of the crackpots that said "the fix was in" with the Red Sox bidding when Henry and Co. purchased the Sox? So the guy he wanted to win the bid, the local who would run the team like a loving uncle, is embroiled in a nasty divorce that has spilled into the baseball operations of the team that he ended up buying and the best he can do is throw this shit out there? Since I only click on his work by mistake, like when it's a column name only (and even then you can usually guess by the drivel in the title that it's him), please tell me he's at least admitted in print the Sox dodged a major bullet by McCourt not getting ownership at some point?
 

dcmissle

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Wasn't CHB one of the loudest of the crackpots that said "the fix was in" with the Red Sox bidding when Henry and Co. purchased the Sox? So the guy he wanted to win the bid, the local who would run the team like a loving uncle, is embroiled in a nasty divorce that has spilled into the baseball operations of the team that he ended up buying and the best he can do is throw this shit out there? Since I only click on his work by mistake, like when it's a column name only (and even then you can usually guess by the drivel in the title that it's him), please tell me he's at least admitted in print the Sox dodged a major bullet by McCourt not getting ownership at some point?

I think SJH is right, and -- let's be honest -- the sale was right up there with the Patrick Ewing draft lottery. Funny though: I missed the follow-up columns from CHB -- and Mazz -- to the effect that we should thnk Selig daily for the "bag job."
 

PedroKsBambino

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There's a lot of reason to think the fix WAS in on the Henry group. It turns out that's a great thing for us; it was hardly Shank's reporting that makes that so, and it's really just another 'blind squirrel' kind of thing.
 
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I don't understand why CHB (or anyone really ) would be surprised that MLB/Selig would have had a preferred candidate for the team's ownership. The league is not a democracy, it's a cartel, or at the very least, like a NYC co-op apartment building. Perhaps A-Rod can afford to buy the penthouse unit but that doesn't they have to sell it to him. There are other mitigating factors besides ability to pay, which is all O'Donnell had going for him.
 

Quiddity

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Looks like the Curse is back now according to Shaughnessy! 2004 and 2007 don't count, he says so. And its even longer than 1918 now...
 

xjack

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So I'm not a big Rachel Nichols fan, but it was sort of creepy hearing Shaughnessy, Gresh and Zolak make fun of her weight on today's show-- something about how these days she'd need to buy two seats on Southwest. All three of those guys are fatter than she is.
 

JohntheBaptist

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The Rachel Nichols from ESPN? Did she blow up and I didn't notice or something? The Rachel Nichols I've seen on TV appears to be actually very thin.

Not that that makes it any less creepy but does it at least make sense?
 

xjack

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The Rachel Nichols from ESPN? Did she blow up and I didn't notice or something? The Rachel Nichols I've seen on TV appears to be actually very thin.

Not that that makes it any less creepy but does it at least make sense?
Yes, from ESPN... I'm not good at distinguishing voices but one of them -- either CHB, Gresh or Zolak -- said something about her having had twins.
 

Corsi

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So I'm not a big Rachel Nichols fan, but it was sort of creepy hearing Shaughnessy, Gresh and Zolak make fun of her weight on today's show-- something about how these days she'd need to buy two seats on Southwest. All three of those guys are fatter than she is.
Do you mean Michelle Bonner? I didn't hear the conversation, but she's the one that actually blew up.
 

xjack

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Do you mean Michelle Bonner? I didn't hear the conversation, but she's the one that actually blew up.
Could have sworn they said Rachel Nichols, but I was driving and was more focused on the road than the radio... Anyone else hear this? Some time between 12:45 and 1:15 or so on 98.5?
 

Harry Hooper

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So I'm not a big Rachel Nichols fan, but it was sort of creepy hearing Shaughnessy, Gresh and Zolak make fun of her weight on today's show-- something about how these days she'd need to buy two seats on Southwest. All three of those guys are fatter than she is.

That's great, after they just finished discussing Lebron's muttering at the post-game press conference and how you should be careful what you say around microphones.
 

berniecarbo1

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That's great, after they just finished discussing Lebron's muttering at the post-game press conference and how you should be careful what you say around microphones.
See for yourself if Rachel Nichols is a load. This was taken about a year ago. She was never a hottie but I did see her on the sidelines in Seattle last year and she wasn't gross. A little overweight and looked more like 30 something housewife tahn she did an Erin Andrews sideline babe.


 

Hyde Park Factor

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When I was a kid (9 or 10 years old), I spent a couple of my hard earned bucks on the Lincoln / Kennedy penny. It came in a special little case and had a tiny little JFK head carved or stamped into the back facing Lincoln. It came with a scroll that detailed the numerous coincidences between the 2 presidents and their assasinations (both names had 7 letters! and so on).

This column reminds me of that.

Edit: forgot link
 

berniecarbo1

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When I was a kid (9 or 10 years old), I spent a couple of my hard earned bucks on the Lincoln / Kennedy penny. It came in a special little case and had a tiny little JFK head carved or stamped into the back facing Lincoln. It came with a scroll that detailed the numerous coincidences between the 2 presidents and their assasinations (both names had 7 letters! and so on).

This column reminds me of that.

Edit: forgot link
What a waste of space. All this was, was a marketing tool to get the fans psyched about a series that at some point in history had a sense of drama to it, but IMHO, today, 2011 has very little cache. It's kind of like two rival athletes from high school who competed against each other but one guy was just a hair bigger, faster and stronger. That tiny edge got the one player a D1 scholarship while the other guy went to a D2 school. 4 years later the players meet again but in that time, because of the better training and facilities the D1 guy got, the players are no longer competitive.

That to me is the Cubs-Sox of 2011. In 2003 this series had juice. Today, the Cubs suck and if they were in the AL they would be a perennial cellar dweller and probably is no better than Cleveland, if that. I think this article begs the question as to whether interleague play has served its purpose and if it should just go away. For example, the Tigers were in Boston this week, They played 2 games at Fenway. Those are the only 2 games the Tigers will play at Fenway all year. Yes the Sox play the Yankees 19 times but they also play the Jays and Orioles 19 times and only play the Angels 6 times...and play NL teams no one really cares about 3 times. IDK but when I was a kid it was always cool to stay up late in the summer to listen to Sox games from the coast a few times a year. Now, they go out west once year. I. know things change and you have to roll with the punches, but baseball is all about history and tradition, more so than any sport, and it seems they have shit canned most of its tradition for a quick buck.

I leave with this thought. If they are going to have interleague play, then they should have visitors rules in the home team parks. In other words, when the Cubs play the Sox at Fenway, there is no DH. The Sox are the home team so they get the last at bat. It would reallly show the fans NL baseball in an American League park . Likewise when the Sox play at Wrigley, there is a DH. I think that might make Interleague play a bit more interesting. I have always advocated this. I don't understand why MLB never considered it. I would also employ that in the World Series and the All Star Game. AL parks, no DH, NL parks get the DH.
 

Leather

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Please. He probably wrote that on the toilet 8 years ago when the Cubs and Sox looked like they were going to play each other in the WS. He just dusted it off and changed a few sentences.

Still beating the "86 years" drum. Shank wishes to hell the Red Sox never won in '04 (or '07).
 

mt8thsw9th

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http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2011/writers/dan_shaughnessy/05/23/gonzo/

There were stormy days in Boston when the Red Sox were outbid in the Mark Teixeira sweepstakes three and a half years ago. Sox bosses John Henry and Larry Lucchino visited the free agent slugger's home during the offseason, then said they felt deceived and used by Teixeira and agent, Scott Boras. The Boston brass was ripped and ridiculed when Teixeira wound up with the Yankees. It got worse when the Yankees went on to win the 2008 World Series.
 

URI

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I bet the Phillies are pissed.
 

Leather

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I don't really recall the Sox being "ripped and ridiculed." It was pretty obvious (as has been mentioned in SoSH multiple times) that Teixeira wanted to go to NYC all along, and the Sox were used as leverage by Boras for more money.

I mean, Christ: the Red Sox were coming off of a World Series championship followed by an appearance in the ALCS. "Stormy Days" in Boston, indeed. The real hand-wringing vis a vis Tex didn't start until AFTER the 2009 season, because everyone thought Ortiz was cooked and Texeira's presence would have meant the difference in that post season.

But, you know, keep twisting the story to wring as much criticism and slighting of the Red Sox Brass as possible.
 

mt8thsw9th

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Well, my major issue was with the 3 and a half years ago bit. It looked like a typo up until he drove it home with the 2008 World Series thing.
 

URI

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I don't really recall the Sox being "ripped and ridiculed."
Shank believes Radio Tony Mazz is the heartbeat of the Red Sox fan.

Always been in touch, that Shaughnessy.
 

Leather

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Well, my major issue was with the 3 and a half years ago bit. It looked like a typo up until he drove it home with the 2008 World Series thing.
Dan Shaughnessy: more douche than meets the eye!