Bill Simmons: Good Luck With Your Life.

nattysez

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There is literally nothing less surprising to me than Simmons being an idiot about this.  I won't even bother listening to the podcast, and I'll likely skip his podcast with Sal on Monday since it's certain to be equally excruciating.
 

drleather2001

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Simmons is so completely out of touch with what it's like to be a fan that he just dives to an extreme negative position. He thinks that's what being a fan is like.

He believes that being a Boston fan from 1985-2005 gave him the whole gamut of emotions. He was wrong.

Ironically, he has no idea what it's like to live and die with a team that's subjected to 24/7 bullshit Bill Simmons coverage.
 

ConigliarosPotential

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I've always been much more of a Simmons defender than detractor, but I've never, ever been tempted to listen to him talk to his father on the podcast. It's one thing to listen to two buddies talk to each other, but to a father and son? I never saw the point or the attraction.
 

Eddie Jurak

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ConigliarosPotential said:
I've always been much more of a Simmons defender than detractor, but I've never, ever been tempted to listen to him talk to his father on the podcast. It's one thing to listen to two buddies talk to each other, but to a father and son? I never saw the point or the attraction.
I actually like those spots with his Dad, better than a lot of the crap he puts on his podcast.  The perspective of someone who has been a diehard Boston sports fan for 50+ years is worthwhile.  This past one wasn't great, but in general I'd much rather listen to that than the worthless "guess the lines" crap that is basically the only football talk he has on the podcast anymore. (A couple of years ago, Simmons had a weekly football podcast with Michael Lombardi and anothr with Aaron Schatz.  Those were usually damned good.)
 

Spacemans Bong

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His playoff podcasts until Lombardi got another NFL job were:
 
Cousin Sal for bartalk bullshit, Lombardi for GM bullshit, Schatz for stats bullshit, Chad Milman for gambling bullshit. And they were good (though you were kind of double dipping on the gambling, so about half the time I'd stop listening once Milman told his weekly Teddy Covers story).
 

m0ckduck

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Number45forever said:
No kidding.  I'm as big a Simmons fanboy as there is and that podcast is absolutely fucking mind numbing.  This plays into the worst of Simmons with the insane conspiracy theories he's always pimping.  This whole week has been an exercise in stupidity.  
 
Haven't gotten to it yet, but is the second half of this podcast with J-Bug any better?
 
The J-Bug part isn't deeply incisive or anything, but it's MUCH better in the sense that he (J-Bug) basically sacks up and arrives at a 'fuck it, it's against the world anyway' stance. A welcome relief from all the Simmons' (father and son) fearful hedging and quivering. 
 

deanx0

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southshoresoxfan said:
Yeah why no Schatz and Millman anymore?
 
Because Schatz's certainty about the Pats winning the Super Bowl and finishing the undefeated season "jinxed" the Pats and Bill cannot take that chance again this year.
 
I am so pissed at myself for listening to the Simmons and his dad podcast. Starting at "this changes the first paragraph of the obituary on the Pats dynasty so that deflate gate is covered" is insane. Who the fuck cares? And if this is that upsetting to you, go root for the Jaguars, Colts, Jets, Texans, anyone else...
 

Stitch01

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Oh man was that bad, the hottakes on Brady's contract are an embarrassment.  Bill just chooses to completely ignore the $18MM dead money hit from moving on from Brady in the offseason or the free $3MM bucks Brady got for changing the deal, all due respect to the "lots of sources" that Bill has talked to it aint that hard to figure out.
 

Morning Woodhead

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I rip on Simmons enough, that I have to give him credit when he earns it.  On the Al Michael's podcast, Al started talking about the week after the Chiefs game (leading up to Cincy) when the hatchets were out for the Pats.  Al said something along the line of "Dan Shaughnessy, who is the voice of the Boston fan".. and Bill stopped him and said "I can't let you say that on my podcast, because he is most definitely not".  I thought it was great.
 
Full disclosure, I have not finished listening to the podcast yet, hopefully they didn't talk Pats again. 
 

The Social Chair

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Simmons also deserves some credit for the way Grantland has handled deflategate. The Charlie Pierce piece was one of the best takes on it, and his football writers are mostly ignoring it. 
 

allstonite

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Morning Woodhead said:
I rip on Simmons enough, that I have to give him credit when he earns it.  On the Al Michael's podcast, Al started talking about the week after the Chiefs game (leading up to Cincy) when the hatchets were out for the Pats.  Al said something along the line of "Dan Shaughnessy, who is the voice of the Boston fan".. and Bill stopped him and said "I can't let you say that on my podcast, because he is most definitely not".  I thought it was great.
 
Full disclosure, I have not finished listening to the podcast yet, hopefully they didn't talk Pats again. 
 
This is true with regards to Shank but it was only a few minutes after he talked about Ballghazi and said Patriots fans were reeling. He was condescendingly talking about the negativity of Boston sports fans right after he was completely down on the Patriots legacy because of this stupid non-controversy. And I only made it through a few minutes with Jacko when he is still saying Belichick threw Brady under the bus last week and Brady's conference looked terrible. I've only been following this thing on here, a few rational local writers (Kyed, Finn), and my group of friends. None of those groups is feeling down about this. Everyone feels like it's an outrageous witch hunt. And everyone capable of reason knew exactly what Belichick and Brady were doing last week and it was coordinated and probably the truth. It was great when he said Shank shouldn't be considered the voice for Boston sports but I also no longer want Simmons considered the voice for Boston sports to the outside world for similar reasons. 
 
Having said all that, the remaining 99% of the Al Michaels podcast was tremendous. They do have great chemistry and Michaels is the sports Forrest Gump. The Hawaii 5-0 stuff was hilarious.
 

DegenerateSoxFan

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Still no column from Simmons on the SB. The Pats are in it, have been unnecessarily shit on over a bogus scandal, and nothing from him Not even a half-assed mailbag. I know he doesn't write much anymore (and most of what he does write doesn't hold up to his early stuff), but what the hell has happened to him? Is this just laziness? I can't believe it's because he's too busy with other shit.
 

PBDWake

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I mean, I shit on Simmons when I think its called for, but he's in LA and his columns go up Friday. It's 8:30 AM over there. His guys probably aren't even in the office yet.
 

Harry Hooper

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He did have this tweet last night: Sources: the NFL is searching for a person of interest who dressed like a referee and didn't write down the measurements of 12 footballs.
 

DegenerateSoxFan

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PBDWake said:
I mean, I shit on Simmons when I think its called for, but he's in LA and his columns go up Friday. It's 8:30 AM over there. His guys probably aren't even in the office yet.
Mays and Pierce had stuff up this morning. This should have been ready to rip this morning for all the time zones. I'm sorry, it just should have.
 

Drocca

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I don't care about his SB pick or any football column, but I would love to see Part 2 of the NBA Trade Value column.
 

Clears Cleaver

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he's probably waiting for Goodell's State of the NFL address before going to print...lol
 
I wish the trade value column came out yesterday
 

kenneycb

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DegenerateSoxFan said:
Mays and Pierce had stuff up this morning. This should have been ready to rip this morning for all the time zones. I'm sorry, it just should have.
His pieces never go up before like 3 ET.  Not sure why you think this would be any different.
 

ifmanis5

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Column is up now it's pretty good. WAY too long and rambling in the middle but ultimately he came to his senses after being a total basket case earlier in the week. I think he realized his when in doubt blame Goodell playbook was a better bet than anything else.
 

nattysez

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Holy lack of self-awareness, Batman.
 
Of course, we spent the last two weeks talking about cheating and footballs and PSI. Physics professors got involved. Multiple media members embarrassed themselves, breathlessly reported bad info or came off like complete hypocrites, although I guess that’s nothing new. There was one 24-hour span last week, right after Belichick seemingly threw Brady under the bus and a rattled Brady rambled in front of reporters for about 15 minutes too long, when it seemed like the Belichick-Brady dynasty was actually imploding. The weekend rolled around, the moment passed, the entire Patriots team shifted into F.U. mode, and that was that.
 
 
If you are a media member who believes highlighted sentence 2, then you are a media member who has embarrassed yourself.
 

johnmd20

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Two questions from his last mailbag that were interesting.
 
 
Q: How scared are you that Russell Wilson seemingly claimed Eli’s Lucky Up-The-Ass Horseshoe and became the luckiest QB alive? I mean, you can totally see him somehow escaping a sure sack and throwing a Hail Mary that bounces off three defenders before getting wedged into a receiver’s facemask for the Super Bowl winning score, right?

—Evan, Tucson, AZ
 
 
That Kearse catch was pretty much that. A hail mary that bounces off people and gets wedged in Kearse's gut. Yikes!
 
And then.
 
 
 
Q: Lions lose in gut wrenching fashion to Cowboys.

Cowboys lose in gut wrenching fashion to Packers.

Packers lose in gut wrenching fashion to Seahawks.

Seahawks lose in gut wrenching fashion to Pats.

—Chris, Austin

 
 
 
Yes, that loss was pretty much the definition of gut wrenching. A funny chain of events.
 

PBDWake

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I did enjoy his podcast with Sal. His theory about how Super Bowls play out was pretty spot on, so much so he felt the need to repeat it
"Either one team is definitively better than the other and they just win, or the two teams are pretty evenly matched and it's a close game decided by a handful of important plays." (Paraphrasing)
 
So the game is either close, or it isn't. Brilliant analysis.
 

JimD

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He was on Cowherd's radio show yesterday and it was a pretty good listen.  He did seem to genuinely revert to being the Boston Sports Guy when he talked about the game (his reaction to Kearse's catch, still being superstitious about recording the game, where this win stands in comparison to other iconic Boston sports moments).  Maybe he's got a good column in him yet about this win.
 

LuckyBen

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JimD said:
He was on Cowherd's radio show yesterday and it was a pretty good listen.  He did seem to genuinely revert to being the Boston Sports Guy when he talked about the game (his reaction to Kearse's catch, still being superstitious about recording the game, where this win stands in comparison to other iconic Boston sports moments).  Maybe he's got a good column in him yet about this win.
I briefly heard the interview and agreed it was good. I found it funny that Cowherd called him out on only being 4 in that Orr playoff game and bill ignored it.
 

DrewDawg

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Mark Schofield said:

 
That's a late night for Mr. Tony.
 
Story here.
 

I'm not begrudging him in the least, but that pic shows why it's hard for him to write as a typical Boston sports fan these days.
 

ifmanis5

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Bill calls his dad, dad gives him some awful sports take opinion and somehow that becomes The Definitive Boston Narrative.
 
Remember when we all cringed at the Brady presser? I never did. Most people on this board thought he did fine and that it was the media who sounded like clods. But hey, his dad was upset so that's that.
 

Silverdude2167

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I have never once listened to his Dad. I guess it is nice of him to involve him and they are obviously very close, but he is on his podcast way to often and brings nothing of substance to it.
 

BrazilianSoxFan

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Silverdude2167 said:
I have never once listened to his Dad. I guess it is nice of him to involve him and they are obviously very close, but he is on his podcast way to often and brings nothing of substance to it.
 
How can you know if you never listened to him?
 

John Marzano Olympic Hero

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It hit me last night as I was shoveling, Bill Simmons is the sports writer equivalent of Fred Lynn. 
 
As soon as he left Boston, things went downhill quickly.
 

SeanBerry

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John Marzano Olympic Hero said:
It hit me last night as I was shoveling, Bill Simmons is the sports writer equivalent of Fred Lynn. 
 
As soon as he left Boston, things went downhill quickly.
 
For L.A. no less.
 
I hope Simmons likes Baltimore, Detroit and San Diego.
 

Deweys New Stance

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John Marzano Olympic Hero said:
It hit me last night as I was shoveling, Bill Simmons is the sports writer equivalent of Fred Lynn. 
 
Fitting, since the 6-year old Bill Simmons dreamed of growing up to be Fred Lynn.  He got his wish, sort of.  Although Fred Lynn doesn't strike me as thin-skinned.
 

joe dokes

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His retro-SB diary isn't bad. His take on belichick not calling a timeout is especially good.
 
We thought he fell asleep. We thought he froze. Repeat: We thought Bill Belichick froze.
You know what really happened? Belichick trusted seven months of practice and two weeks of scouting, and he trusted the fact that he’d already prepared a 24-year-old undrafted rookie to react perfectly, historically and remarkably if that slant was coming. He’ll never get credit because the whole thing seemed too improbable. After all, how could a coach behave THAT differently from every other coach in that exact same spot?
 
 

DegenerateSoxFan

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I thought retro diary thing mostly sucked. I really thought we might get a (relatively) gimmick-free COLUMN from him after an event like that.

I was wrong. He really isn't interested in writing anymore.
 

Kenny F'ing Powers

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The only part of the game I wanted to read his visceral feelings for (the pick) he tried to give rational analysis.

Definitely missed the mark. If this is the piece he puts together after THAT game, it may be time to step away from the keyboard for good.
 

TheoShmeo

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I liked it a lot.  I thought he captured a lot of what I think many of us were going through during the end of that game and in the aftermath.
 
His comments about why this one meant a lot resonated.  Not that any of it was particularly novel but I thought it was well said.
 
And the reader's point about the Kearse catch being Boone 2003 and the Butler play being the 0-3 comeback, all in the matter of seconds rather than a year, was terrific.  It wasn't Bill's work but it was still something he recognized as dead on.
 
I'm neither a Simmons lover or hater.  I just thought this bit of work captured things well and I agree with Joe Dokes that his take on Carroll was strong.
 

mpx42

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I watched the full broadcast of the game again, and couldn't believe how many different times Collinsworth brought it up. Like five different times, at key moments in the game.
 

Kliq

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Nailed it.

 
12:10 (First-and-10, NE 32): After Brady got sacked on first down and threw a four-yard out on second down, the reeling Pats are facing an uber-crucial third-and-14 on New England’s 28. Does the normally superb NBC crew use this specific moment to bring up Deflategate, question Brady’s integrity and show Roger Goodell sitting glumly in his suite? Of course it does! Here’s how it sounds.
 
Cris Collinsworth: “I said, ‘Tom, look me in the eye … ’”
 
(Look me in the eye? What are you, his ninth grade principal? Didn’t you already tell us this story in the pregame show? And why are you bringing this up right before the biggest third down of my season?)
 
Collinsworth: “‘ … and tell me you couldn’t have possibly said anything to a ball boy, an assistant coach, somebody in the organization to lead them to believe that you wanted air let out of the football.’”
 
(Hold on, we’re on the edge of our seats. I don’t even care that my entire football season is on the line with THE CURRENT F’N PLAY. What did Brady say? Did he confess? I really hope he confessed, because I can’t think of another reason you’re bringing this up right now.)
 
Collinsworth: “And he said, ‘Absolutely not.’ He could not have been more emphatic.”
 
(Great. Great news. Also, if this were about Peyton Manning, Collinsworth would have thrown in, “And I wasn’t even a little surprised, because someday, we’re going to use Peyton Manning’s hemoglobin to cure cancer.”)
 
 

HomeBrew1901

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TheoShmeo said:
I liked it a lot.  I thought he captured a lot of what I think many of us were going through during the end of that game and in the aftermath.
 
His comments about why this one meant a lot resonated.  Not that any of it was particularly novel but I thought it was well said.
 
And the reader's point about the Kearse catch being Boone 2003 and the Butler play being the 0-3 comeback, all in the matter of seconds rather than a year, was terrific.  It wasn't Bill's work but it was still something he recognized as dead on.
 
I'm neither a Simmons lover or hater.  I just thought this bit of work captured things well and I agree with Joe Dokes that his take on Carroll was strong.
I'm with Theo, this article was fantastic and encapsulated everything I felt culminating with this:
 
 
When you’ve been rooting for the same people for 15 years, at some point the stakes become greater. You want that last exclamation-point title. (Just ask Spurs fans.) You want to feel like you rooted for a dynasty, or something close to it, instead of just “a team that won a couple of times.” You want to say that you rooted for the best coach ever and the best quarterback ever, and you want to be constantly amazed that they showed up to save your sad-sack franchise at the exact same time. Patriots fans took Deflategate personally, and with reason — it was a shoddily reported story that never added up. Belichick and Robert Kraft remained defiant that the team did nothing wrong; the fans followed suit. It’s always fun to root for a champ, but when it becomes “us against them,” it resonates in a totally different way.
That exclamation-point title happened only after a legitimately astounding sequence: Kearse’s stomach-punch catch; Belichick bucking conventional wisdom and mind-f’ing Carroll; Seattle sticking with a pass play against the wrong defense, looking disorganized and plowing ahead anyway; then Butler jumping the route like he was being fast-forwarded, crushing the receiver, holding on to a bullet pass AND lurching forward to avoid the safety. This sideline camera view of the pick was incredible