My town had a coaching shortage this spring. While I’ve been assisting most of my son’s teams, this is my first dive into being responsible for the entire group. Prior to this I’ve coached middle, high school, and college goalkeepers.
So far, everything is going well, but I have one player I can’t figure out. He’s 7, but he reminds me of my son’s behavior much younger.
It started with little things. I had the kids doing a group drill. He stopped and ran over to tell me he’s an expert on dinosaurs. I was totally unprepared for that. I like to kneel down to get to eye level, so I did and told him that’s cool, but I want him to focus on soccer with us and we can talk dinosaurs outside of our team time. Later on in practice, I explained a drill to the team and asked for questions. He raised his hand. “My dad yelled at my mom for getting the wrong kind of coffee.”
Okay.
About 45 seconds into our scrimmage, he breaks down in an epic meltdown, crying madly. “When do I get to score a goal?”
Again, down to eye level. I explained that soccer is a team sport, but our opponents want to stop us from scoring as much as we want to score. I told him that our time in practice was to work on the skills that would help us score goals and get our teammates to score, too. No effect, just howling, screaming, and crying. I should mention his father was there the entire time. I told him I wanted him to score a goal but we’d have to work together to make it happen. I couldn’t promise we’d all score goals, but we would give it our best effort. Sometimes the best things in soccer are helping our teammates, stealing the ball, stopping a goal, etc. He kept sobbing but at least ran around with his teammates.
Next practice, more of the same. I had the kids lined up with partners to learn throw ins. He explodes in tears. “I wanted to be the first one to try a throw in!” Down to eye level… “We’re taking turns, it’s your turn, why don’t you try one?”
Corner kicks, I at least anticipated he’d want to be the first one, so I took him to the corner, gave him the ball, and told him to kick it to a teammate. He did, the teammate scored. Kid starts howling. “I wanted to score the goal!”
This is it. This is the cadence. I spent entirely too much time with him. I’m trying not to overtly cater, attempting to put things in context, but man, I’m running out of ideas. It’s not fair to his teammates, either, because I’m clearly giving the kid special treatment.
His dad has been watching every move, every word, but hasn’t offered anything at all. This is unknown territory for me. I see it as my job to expose the kids to the game, teach them some basic skills, help them understand sportsmanship and being on a team, and teach them how to be coached. I already have the other kids “identified” somewhat and know how I want to approach the three groups (love soccer, there to try soccer, and soccer being used as daycare). I can deal with all of that. This one, though… I’m two practices in. Is it out of bounds to consider a chat with his dad? Do I let it play out further? Is this just normal 7 year old behavior? I just have no clue where to go with it.
So far, everything is going well, but I have one player I can’t figure out. He’s 7, but he reminds me of my son’s behavior much younger.
It started with little things. I had the kids doing a group drill. He stopped and ran over to tell me he’s an expert on dinosaurs. I was totally unprepared for that. I like to kneel down to get to eye level, so I did and told him that’s cool, but I want him to focus on soccer with us and we can talk dinosaurs outside of our team time. Later on in practice, I explained a drill to the team and asked for questions. He raised his hand. “My dad yelled at my mom for getting the wrong kind of coffee.”
Okay.
About 45 seconds into our scrimmage, he breaks down in an epic meltdown, crying madly. “When do I get to score a goal?”
Again, down to eye level. I explained that soccer is a team sport, but our opponents want to stop us from scoring as much as we want to score. I told him that our time in practice was to work on the skills that would help us score goals and get our teammates to score, too. No effect, just howling, screaming, and crying. I should mention his father was there the entire time. I told him I wanted him to score a goal but we’d have to work together to make it happen. I couldn’t promise we’d all score goals, but we would give it our best effort. Sometimes the best things in soccer are helping our teammates, stealing the ball, stopping a goal, etc. He kept sobbing but at least ran around with his teammates.
Next practice, more of the same. I had the kids lined up with partners to learn throw ins. He explodes in tears. “I wanted to be the first one to try a throw in!” Down to eye level… “We’re taking turns, it’s your turn, why don’t you try one?”
Corner kicks, I at least anticipated he’d want to be the first one, so I took him to the corner, gave him the ball, and told him to kick it to a teammate. He did, the teammate scored. Kid starts howling. “I wanted to score the goal!”
This is it. This is the cadence. I spent entirely too much time with him. I’m trying not to overtly cater, attempting to put things in context, but man, I’m running out of ideas. It’s not fair to his teammates, either, because I’m clearly giving the kid special treatment.
His dad has been watching every move, every word, but hasn’t offered anything at all. This is unknown territory for me. I see it as my job to expose the kids to the game, teach them some basic skills, help them understand sportsmanship and being on a team, and teach them how to be coached. I already have the other kids “identified” somewhat and know how I want to approach the three groups (love soccer, there to try soccer, and soccer being used as daycare). I can deal with all of that. This one, though… I’m two practices in. Is it out of bounds to consider a chat with his dad? Do I let it play out further? Is this just normal 7 year old behavior? I just have no clue where to go with it.