l'affaire Vardy, a/k/a WAGatha Christie

OilCanShotTupac

Sunny von Bulow
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Jan 10, 2004
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This is tremendous - not least of which because random American blogs and celebrity magazines are trying to explain who Jamie Vardy is.

Coleen Rooney, wife to Wayne (he of the frequent philandering, including while drunk behind the wheel of his erstwhile mistress whom he's known for less than a day, but that's some different scandal), threw Twitter into an uproar by posting this:


View: https://twitter.com/ColeenRoo/status/1181864136155828224?s=20


For context, both Coleen and Rebekah are reality-show stars and well-known WAGs ("Wives and Girlfriends") of their footballing husbands.

Rebekah replied, less than persuasively:

View: https://www.instagram.com/p/B3ZL3B0hQTZ/?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet

The replies have been beyond fantastic. Rooney has been dubbed WAGatha Christie, and it's even trending hot on Twitter in the US, where no one knows any of these people:

View: https://twitter.com/kambolecampbell/status/1181884679982583809?s=20


View: https://twitter.com/jenofcroths/status/1181877267355574272?s=20
 
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cgori

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Who are these people, why should I care, and why have you posted 3 times in 20 minutes about it?
Because it's hilarious. They are both the wives/girlfriends of English soccer stars. It says a lot to me about the state of culture (& also the sickening tabloid press in the UK) that somehow "who did what on insta to me" is a big deal, even in some narrow way.
 

santadevil

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Because it's hilarious. They are both the wives/girlfriends of English soccer stars. It says a lot to me about the state of culture (& also the sickening tabloid press in the UK) that somehow "who did what on insta to me" is a big deal, even in some narrow way.
Exactly. It baffles me that this is news and this person gets a Twitter verified account, because of who she married

First day on SoSH?
2nd...takes a long time to post almost 4,000 times...
 

Philip Jeff Frye

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Who are these people, why should I care, and why have you posted 3 times in 20 minutes about it?
This would be roughly the equivalent of Gisele Bündchen catching Jesse James Decker leaking stories to the National Enquirer, only if Jesse James Decker were married to Drew Brees instead of Eric Decker.

I saw a book Coleen Rooney had written in a bookstore in London several years ago. It caught my eye because it claimed on the cover that she was the most photographed woman in England. I looked it up on Amazon's UK website. The reader reviews are a pretty funny read.
 

singaporesoxfan

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Who are these people, why should I care, and why have you posted 3 times in 20 minutes about it?
I mean, you're in the soccer/football forum, and these are the WAGs of two very famous players. Coming here and asking "who are these people" is like going into the Red Sox Forum and complaining about the speculation about David Ortiz's personal life.

Also, the story is objectively hilarious
 

SoxFanInCali

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California. Duh.
I mean...I hate tabloid journalism as much as anyone, but if you can't laugh at this, then your sense of humor needs a little work.
 

SocrManiac

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When I initially heard the WAGs were rowing, I couldn't wrap my head around what it could possibly be. Why would Jamie Vardy be going after an older woman? That's Wayne's gig. Why would Wayne be tagging Rebekah? She must be even younger than his wife, right?

Nope. Rebekah is older. Mind already blown.

To see what it's actually about is somehow equally fun.
 

OilCanShotTupac

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For the uninitiated, which presumably you are not in this forum, Wayne Rooney is the GOAT of English football. He and Coleen grew up in a working-class neighborhood of Liverpool and have been together since their teens. He broke into the Premier League at age 16, with Everton FC, about a mile from where he grew up. His first goal for Everton made him the youngest scorer in Premier League history at the time. The goal and the prophetic announcers' call "REMEMBER THE NAME!" are legendary. He went on to a glorious career at Manchester United and is the leading goalscorer in history for England.

View: https://www.facebook.com/Everton/videos/10154776558706277/?v=10154776558706277


He and Coleen have four sons which hasn’t stopped him from frequent encounters with prostitutes (including 2 at a time) and this nasty bit of business when Coleen was pregnant with #4:


Wayne went to play for DC United last year but is going back to England ostensibly because his wife misses home (i.e. "Wayne is banging some tart"). Despite his many indiscretions, Wayne is a genial guy and is generally well-liked. Coleen has a career as a multi-media presence but it's working-class mom, girl-next-door, not glam. She may be the wife of the English equivalent of Tom Brady, but her personality is definitely not Giselle Bundchen.

Jamie Vardy is a not-all-time-great-but-still-very-good, who banged around the lower levels of English football before catching on at Leicester City, a mid-budget team who improbably won the Premier League title a few years ago. He's kind of a miserable snot, a quality that makes him a good striker - he's ruthless.

Vardy and Rooney have been teammates for England.



I don't know much about Rebekah, other than she's done reality TV.

The story is remarkable just on its face; it's even better given the celebrity of all involved; the thing that elevates it into all-time classic status is the heel turn by Coleen and the devastating effectiveness of that last line - it's as if Kelly Clarkson suddenly morphed into a combination of Agent Scully and Dorothy Parker.
 

shaggydog2000

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For the uninitiated, which presumably you are not in this forum, Wayne Rooney is the GOAT of English football. He and Coleen grew up in a working-class neighborhood of Liverpool and have been together since their teens. He broke into the Premier League at age 16, with Everton FC, about a mile from where he grew up. His first goal for Everton made him the youngest scorer in Premier League history at the time. The goal and the prophetic announcers' call "REMEMBER THE NAME!" are legendary. He went on to a glorious career at Manchester United and is the leading goalscorer in history for England.

View: https://www.facebook.com/Everton/videos/10154776558706277/?v=10154776558706277


He and Coleen have four sons which hasn’t stopped him from frequent encounters with prostitutes (including 2 at a time) and this nasty bit of business when Coleen was pregnant with #4:


Wayne went to play for DC United last year but is going back to England ostensibly because his wife misses home (i.e. "Wayne is banging some tart"). Despite his many indiscretions, Wayne is a genial guy and is generally well-liked. Coleen has a career as a multi-media presence but it's working-class mom, girl-next-door, not glam. She may be the wife of the English equivalent of Tom Brady, but her personality is definitely not Giselle Bundchen.

Jamie Vardy is a not-all-time-great-but-still-very-good, who banged around the lower levels of English football before catching on at Leicester City, a mid-budget team who improbably won the Premier League title a few years ago. He's kind of a miserable snot, a quality that makes him a good striker - he's ruthless.

Vardy and Rooney have been teammates for England.



I don't know much about Rebekah, other than she's done reality TV.

The story is remarkable just on its face; it's even better given the celebrity of all involved; the thing that elevates it into all-time classic status is the heel turn by Coleen and the devastating effectiveness of that last line - it's as if Kelly Clarkson suddenly morphed into a combination of Agent Scully and Dorothy Parker.
Also, Rooney looks a lot like Shrek, and Vardy looks like an anthropomorphic weasel. Just to add color to the story.
 

67YAZ

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And of course, Jamie Vardy is a social media legend and a fun Twitter follow. It’s something else that his wife got played on social media. Chat shit get banged indeed.
 

OilCanShotTupac

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Really? C'mon.
By reputation, in terms of currently active (sort of) players, for a general audience, sure. You can make a case for another name on footballing merit, but for telling the story it's acceptable shorthand IMO. Being the all-time leading goal-scorer for the Three Lions is a decent proxy for GOAT, no?
 

swiftaw

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For general audience, I would guess most people would say Beckham before Rooney.
 

Titans Bastard

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By reputation, in terms of currently active (sort of) players, for a general audience, sure. You can make a case for another name on footballing merit, but for telling the story it's acceptable shorthand IMO. Being the all-time leading goal-scorer for the Three Lions is a decent proxy for GOAT, no?
For general audience, I would guess most people would say Beckham before Rooney.
Needless to say, neither of you will be invited to breakfast with Gazza.
 

swiftaw

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That’s fair. Who could they get to replace him, though? I don’t think the lack of a big name should necessarily be an obstacle to canning Emery, but it’s a consideration.
Needless to say, neither of you will be invited to breakfast with Gazza.
Certainly Gazza is the most naturally gifted English footballer I've seen in my lifetime, but many people younger than me have barely heard of him, but they all remember Beckham.
 

Zomp

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By reputation, in terms of currently active (sort of) players, for a general audience, sure. You can make a case for another name on footballing merit, but for telling the story it's acceptable shorthand IMO. Being the all-time leading goal-scorer for the Three Lions is a decent proxy for GOAT, no?
Yes. He’s in the conversation. England and United’s all time leading goal scorer. Was a central part of arguably the greatest English side in history.
 

Spacemans Bong

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Conig is right, calling Rooney the greatest English player ever is laughable. That’s one of the two Bobbys, Moore or Charlton.

Rooney might possibly be underrated, I’ve rarely seen him make Top 10 or even Top 20 lists of greatest English/British players ever.
 

OilCanShotTupac

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Conig is right, calling Rooney the greatest English player ever is laughable. That’s one of the two Bobbys, Moore or Charlton.

Rooney might possibly be underrated, I’ve rarely seen him make Top 10 or even Top 20 lists of greatest English/British players ever.
*sigh*

this was for shorthand purposes of describing a fun social media thing, not a detailed debate,re the comparison with Brady, etc, yes I know Moore Carlton George Best etc, the whole thing started with a photo of Rooney and Vardy chatting in their Three Lions gear so I was thinking of the national side and he is the top scorer etc. I am duly chastised and we can move on to an in depth examination of Gary Lineker
 

Spacemans Bong

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*sigh*

this was for shorthand purposes of describing a fun social media thing, not a detailed debate,re the comparison with Brady, etc, yes I know Moore Carlton George Best etc, the whole thing started with a photo of Rooney and Vardy chatting in their Three Lions gear so I was thinking of the national side and he is the top scorer etc. I am duly chastised and we can move on to an in depth examination of Gary Lineker
Yeah sorry, didn’t mean to go in with both feet there since you’re absolutely right it’s not germane to the social media hilarity we’ve seen.

But I’m always up for a football history debate. Gary Lineker or Jimmy Greaves?
 

OilCanShotTupac

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I see we have a unionist in our midst.
Off topic and better suited for the Brexit thread maybe, but: this is more-or-less correct since there isn't a word for "UK-ian" or "UK-ish," right?

I know it's a politically loaded thing but in the context of being from one of the home nations it's accurate, yes? Asking because I really don't know.

BTW, I trust your stuff in the Brexit thread more than anything else I read to keep me informed on what's really going on with that.
 

Spacemans Bong

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Off topic and better suited for the Brexit thread maybe, but: this is more-or-less correct since there isn't a word for "UK-ian" or "UK-ish," right?

I know it's a politically loaded thing but in the context of being from one of the home nations it's accurate, yes? Asking because I really don't know.

BTW, I trust your stuff in the Brexit thread more than anything else I read to keep me informed on what's really going on with that.
I'm just teasin' ya. British would be the correct term, but so would Irish. Ian Paisley called himself Irish on many occasions. Obviously those leaning nationalist or republican would prefer Irish, but it's one of the contradictions of Northern Irish life that people's use of each term is fluid according to circumstances. It's an oft-heard argument that the reason police collusion with unionists during the Troubles was so problematic was that it was denying other British people (republicans) justice and impeding their rights. Which is completely true - they were and are British citizens. Likewise Northern Irish farmers, who are primarily Protestant unionists, would probably be rather miffed at the idea of separating the two Irelands and killing their farming business. The Irish cricket team is primarily Protestants from Ulster: probably the best cricket club in Ireland is Donemana, where William Porterfield (the Irish captain) and a couple of other players come from, and Donemana's the kind of town where the street curbs are painted red, white and blue. The captain of the Irish rugby team is Rory Best, who is also a Protestant from Ulster, and Willie-John McBride and Mike Gibson are two of Ireland's three or four greatest rugby players and both Ulster Protestants. All-Ireland sports (the GAA excepted, since that is an explicitly nationalist institution founded during the Gaelic Revival that ultimately inspired the 1916 Rising) tend to avoid overtly political symbols and go with lots of shamrocks and the four provinces flag of Ireland.

Bringing this back to football, Best came out for an all-Ireland team late in life, which is an extremely rare position for a non-republican to make. Soccer is one of the very, very few sports (the only other one I can remember is snooker, weirdly) which is not played on an all-Ireland basis and the Northern Irish team, which was the better team for most of the 20th century, has a substantial tradition of its own that would be hard to fold into the Republic of Ireland's soccer tradition without expert care.

Everybody knows about James McClean, whose family and background (the Creggan in Derry) is staunchly republican, choosing to play for the Republic over Northern Ireland, but there was and still is a substantial number of Catholic players and coaches in the NI setup. Michael O'Neill is Catholic, Martin O'Neill and Pat Jennings would waltz (or jig?) into an all-time Northern Ireland XI, and it's pretty easy to spot the Catholics when NI play: they're the ones not singing God Save The Queen.

And thanks, I appreciate that. It hits a lot of buttons for me, besides affecting me personally. I think I have a 5,000 word post here or on the old board about how the Lisbon Treaty is flawed but good.
 

fletcherpost

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Off topic and better suited for the Brexit thread maybe, but: this is more-or-less correct since there isn't a word for "UK-ian" or "UK-ish," right?

I know it's a politically loaded thing but in the context of being from one of the home nations it's accurate, yes? Asking because I really don't know.

BTW, I trust your stuff in the Brexit thread more than anything else I read to keep me informed on what's really going on with that.
There's a Brexit Thread. Thank God I don't have V&N enabled. Last time i checked SoSH was vehemently pro Union (GB&NI); no doubt SOSH is pro remain. Even a stopped clock and all that.
 

fletcherpost

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I see we have a unionist in our midst.
I know it's out of context and in jest - but i love it all the same. It's something I would post.

I saw George Best in a pub on the Kings Road; I went in for a beer, it was his local. He looked terrible, but really happy. He died not long after. The Wedding Present's 'George Best' is still one of the greatest LP title and LP Covers of all time. I bet Jamie Vardy hates the Wedding Present. But Rooney kinda likes em.
 

fletcherpost

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I am sorry. I do give a review of the SNP after MSNBC wrote an article about them in my last dispatch from Borisland.
Dont want to derail, but you know I understand, but have little regard for two types: non fall fans and people who don't want Indy for Scotland. I have love for these people, but i accept that they are intellectually inferior. But i love em, and i do not wish to derail this fine thread. PM me if you're pro indy. Or at least let me know so i can apply the data to my hard drive that is my floating grey abundance.
 

Spacemans Bong

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Dont want to derail, but you know I understand, but have little regard for two types: non fall fans and people who don't want Indy for Scotland. I have love for these people, but i accept that they are intellectually inferior. But i love em, and i do not wish to derail this fine thread. PM me if you're pro indy. Or at least let me know so i can apply the data to my hard drive that is my floating grey abundance.
I’m up in Glasgow in November, we could just talk about it over tinnies of Super Tennants in Cathkin Park.

My position has changed now to: can you annex Lewisham and take us with you?
 

InstaFace

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Is SoSH very pro-Union? That surprises me I guess.
My sense is that most Americans see the greater strength that derives from multiple nations, some of whom occasionally literally want to kill each other, banding together economically and politically in the name of greater world heft (and exchange rates, and economies of scale, and yadda yadda). And that SoSH (well, V&N) is representative of that, but hasn't thought about it much more deeply than that, and generally has little regard for how that banding-together was achieved (as opposed to the truly voluntary nature of our own Union). And likewise little understanding of the ways in which the nominal equality of the states within the UK have been undermined and the non-English parts treated as second-class citizens over the decades and especially centuries. I know I lack a deep understanding of that (and the UK is one of the four places I've lived in my life)... I just know enough to know that the history makes it unlike our own experience here.

Those on the board who are ethnically scottish despite being lifelong americans vary in their views - if I recall correctly, Rip's are particularly nuanced. But most of us lack the nuance to be said to be "very pro-anything" on the issue. Just tentatively so, at most.

Will leave anything further on this to V&N.