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Protecting the Shields -- The Nick Cafardo Thread

Discussion in 'Our Errors are Mistakes: The Media Forum' started by MyDaughterLovesTomGordon, Jan 19, 2009.

  1. shaggydog2000

    shaggydog2000 Member SoSH Member

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    4,762
    The only way he could improve the rankings would be to assign every manager a rating with two decimal places, without giving a methodology, and with the numbers not correlating with the rankings.

    1. Alex Cora - 4.28
    2. Bob Melvin - 5.01
    .
    .
    .
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    11 Aaron Boone - Q
    .
    .
     
  2. joe dokes

    joe dokes Member SoSH Member

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    12,009
    Right, Nick. Character? Not at all. None.
    In fact, they first went after Charlie Manson, but the few remaining scouts forced them to back off when their computers told them that dead guys suck at baseball.
     
  3. JohntheBaptist

    JohntheBaptist Member SoSH Member

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    11,280
    "This team over here signed character guys that are good at baseball for their character more than their baseball skill so good for them but these nerd computer-havers over there hired character guys but it totally wasn't for their character."

    The guy is fucking braindead.

    (I also love that it seems not a single baseball writer has discovered a synonym for "analytics" yet).
     
  4. E5 Yaz

    E5 Yaz Transcends message boarding Lifetime Member SoSH Member

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    57,824
    Added to the insanity, Nick's knock on not considering character comes directly after he quotes Cash as saying:

    “This is a special group of players. There’s so much positive energy that these guys exhibit on a daily basis. We had that last year and you can see we have it again this year."

    Meanwhile,

    2. If you’re a player 32 or older, don’t expect much of a contract. You don’t score very high on team algorithm models. It’s a good thing that the Red Sox didn’t feel this way about 35-year-old Steve Pearce, the 2018 World Series MVP. Older players do great things. They also provide leadership and chemistry, intangibles lost in those models.
     
  5. joe dokes

    joe dokes Member SoSH Member

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    12,009
    It's spelled "team algorithim models," but it's pronounced "boogeyman."
     
  6. John Marzano Olympic Hero

    John Marzano Olympic Hero has fancy plans, and pants to match Dope

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    19,566
    I’m going to ask Nick for $10,000 so I can invest it for him. I don’t know much about the stock market but I have pluck. That’s an intangible, right?

    Maybe he’ll let me do his inevitable open heart surgery. Again, I’m not a doctor but I used to channel surf past ER on Thursday nights.

    I’m glad he’s nowhere near running my favorite team.
     
  7. Dick Pole Upside

    Dick Pole Upside Member SoSH Member

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    4,192
    Scouts tell me that he chews tobacco, once gave his bullpen coach a hotfoot, and left a bubblegum bubble on the button of an unsuspecting David Price’s hat. Analytics can’t put a value on this, and his stories lift the spirits of teammates during rain delays.

    It’s mystifying how he remains unsigned, and this is Exhibit A about how baseball’s system is broken.
     
  8. scottyno

    scottyno Member SoSH Member

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    4,447
    Shields clearly did wonders for the White Sox young staff last year. Also hasn't been an above average pitcher in 5 years, which I hear is something most teams are looking for when they sign a guy to actually throw a ball.
     
  9. Humphrey

    Humphrey Member SoSH Member

    Messages:
    678
    I should make a chart of the number of times in 2019 he mentions Shields, Joey Batts and a few other washed up veterans.
     
  10. John Marzano Olympic Hero

    John Marzano Olympic Hero has fancy plans, and pants to match Dope

    Messages:
    19,566
    Excel doesn't have enough rows and columns for the amount of data that you're going to enter.

    But you should try.
     
  11. Van Everyman

    Van Everyman Member SoSH Member

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    16,840
    Drink every time Nick says “analytics”:

    https://www.bostonglobe.com/sports/...re-concerns/iEqtAJw7IaDZ6WXLkE69QL/story.html
     
  12. John Marzano Olympic Hero

    John Marzano Olympic Hero has fancy plans, and pants to match Dope

    Messages:
    19,566
    Wait. He doesn't mind three-hour games, but he minds that baseball is too long? Does he even bother to give his stuff a cursory reread before he turns it in? Do his editors give a shit?

    This is the fucking bullshit that I can't stand with this guy. And it's not like it happens once a month or even once a week, it's every time he publishes an article. There is no consistency in thoughts other than, "James Shields can really help some team out!" (he can't) and "MLB is losing scouts hand over fist and it's a huge emergency" (they're not).

    Fuck this dude. Jesus.
     
  13. joe dokes

    joe dokes Member SoSH Member

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    12,009
    I *think* he's saying, "I don't mind 3-hour games. But for those of you who do, the answer is not adding a clock, it's doing away with Cyberdyne wasting valuable seconds telling pitchers what to throw."

    And all hail the new thread title....
     
  14. John Marzano Olympic Hero

    John Marzano Olympic Hero has fancy plans, and pants to match Dope

    Messages:
    19,566
    Rereading those two paragraphs, that's one interpretation. And I don't think that you're necessarily wrong. But knowing what we know about Wilbur's dislike of analytics, I'm not sure if that's the case. If he was for longer games (like he claims he is) wouldn't he want pitchers to spend more time and concentrate on the next pitch that they're going to throw, rather than get on the hill and huck the ball?

    And BTW, this is the first time that I've read anyone anwhere make the argument that having Wade fucking Miley on your team is better than having David Price. "Well, he'll lose a lot more and give up more hits, walk a ton more and strike out far fewer ... but he'll do it quicker!"
     
  15. Smiling Joe Hesketh

    Smiling Joe Hesketh All Hail King Boron Dope

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    30,212
    Wade Miley returned all of Nick's calls. And like Nick, Wade Miley is profoundly mediocre. No wonder Nick loves him.
     
  16. Dick Pole Upside

    Dick Pole Upside Member SoSH Member

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    4,192
  17. tims4wins

    tims4wins PN23's replacement SoSH Member

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    19,922
    I clicked on the first page of this thread, for fun. The timeframe was early 2009, so 10 years ago. And we were literally writing the same things then as today. It's hilarious.
     
  18. joe dokes

    joe dokes Member SoSH Member

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    12,009
    So was Nick.

    And now Nick can blame the analyticists and their fancy clock when Shields doesn't get picked up.
     
  19. John Marzano Olympic Hero

    John Marzano Olympic Hero has fancy plans, and pants to match Dope

    Messages:
    19,566
    I have become what I hate, I've been writing the exact same thing for ten years. I'm actually pleasantly surprised that I haven't had an aneurysm.
     
  20. joe dokes

    joe dokes Member SoSH Member

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    12,009
    Someone check me here. I know the default is that Nick is an idiot, but....Cora said this in the context of no Kimbrel:

    Then Nick wrote this:
    Cora's point just flew right passed him, didn't it? He was trying to point out that Barnes faced at least the same quality of hitters that Kimbrel did.

    (I can't figure out how to get the numbers that Cora was actually talking about).
     
    #4820 joe dokes, Feb 19, 2019 at 4:36 PM
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2019 at 4:44 PM
  21. tims4wins

    tims4wins PN23's replacement SoSH Member

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    19,922
    Wow that is horrible
     
  22. E5 Yaz

    E5 Yaz Transcends message boarding Lifetime Member SoSH Member

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    57,824
    How do you know you're not in a coma, dreaming all this?
     

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