Pearl Jammin' with Grandpa, the Bill Simmons Thread

nattysez

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I am a big advocate of letting people raise their kids as they see fit (within reason), so the fact that Parent Corner always fills me with disgust makes me realize that there is something about BSG that just rubs me the wrong way. The easy solve is to never listen to PC and otherwise enjoy Guess the Lines.

I avoided PC most of last season but gave it a try today and will return to skipping it.
 

cromulence

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For those of us who haven't heard it, can we get a brief summary of the newest Parent Corner? I'm guessing more tales about Bill's son being spoiled beyond belief?
 

nattysez

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For those of us who haven't heard it, can we get a brief summary of the newest Parent Corner? I'm guessing more tales about Bill's son being spoiled beyond belief?
IIRC:
-at 13 years old, his son skateboards to places Bill doesn't know anything about and hangs out with people Bill doesn't know every day. Bill thinks there are girls involved. Bill proudly cites this as "70s-80s parenting."
- Bill's proffered solution to this is to send him to an all-boys school.
- But his son wants to play football, which for reasons I believe were unexplained makes the all-boys school less viable.

Prior to that, Bill shared a story about his wife screaming at his daughter so vociferously in the car that she had to pull over. Part of the issue was that his daughter was at a party with 100 people at which her purse with her driver's permit in it was stolen.

Happy to be corrected if I have any of that wrong.
 

luckiestman

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I am a big advocate of letting people raise their kids as they see fit (within reason), so the fact that Parent Corner always fills me with disgust makes me realize that there is something about BSG that just rubs me the wrong way. The easy solve is to never listen to PC and otherwise enjoy Guess the Lines.

I avoided PC most of last season but gave it a try today and will return to skipping it.
This is a healthy attitude, seriously.
 

Moosbrugger

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Here, let me explain a joke so that all the humor is drained from it. Parent’s corner is about fucking up- and finding relief and humor from the common experience of fucking up as a parent.
If your take away is that the bit celebrates poor choices and indifferent parenting, congratulations on your excellent judgment and perfect home life.
 

cromulence

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I mean, fine. Not sure where the weird projection about judgment and a perfect home life came from, but everyone is entitled to their opinion. And along those lines, I still think Bill's son sounds like a bit of a spoiled asshole, so whaddya know?
 

johnmd20

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I mean, fine. Not sure where the weird projection about judgment and a perfect home life came from, but everyone is entitled to their opinion. And along those lines, I still think Bill's son sounds like a bit of a spoiled asshole, so whaddya know?
The comment about judgement probably came from the fact that people were being judgmental. Like you are being.

But wadda I know?
 

cromulence

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The comment about judgement probably came from the fact that people were being judgmental. Like you are being.

But wadda I know?
Not much, apparently. I never judged anyone. I didn't say that Bill is a bad parent and should be ashamed of himself. I just expressed an opinion that his son sounds like a bit of a brat.

It never ceases to amaze me how people act in this thread. Can we just lighten up and discuss our favorite ex-writer?
 

Joe Sixpack

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Parent Corner is basically "Rich People Problems."

I love the segment though, it amuses me and I don't need to think they are all wonderful people to enjoy it. We all fuck up as parents so it's relatable in that way, even if the specifics or the parenting approach are different.
 

Bozo Texino

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Not much, apparently. I never judged anyone. I didn't say that Bill is a bad parent and should be ashamed of himself. I just expressed an opinion that his son sounds like a bit of a brat.
I'm a big fan of parent corner, but I can totally see where you're coming from. There are times when I've listened and thought "Man. I'm glad I don't have this kid in one of my classes."
 

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Having trouble linking to it from here (can't link from twitter/reddit on this computer) but BSG is catching a little flack for the something he said in the originally released (now edited out of the re-released) Cousin Sal podcat-- he said "some new nerd culture movie came out—shanghai? the shanghai express? shang chi? who knows but we broke it ...", got criticized for it (saying Asian names sound alike is not exactly the cutting edge of humor), and edited out of the podcast.

He really is stuck in 1986 sometimes.
 

The Social Chair

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Having trouble linking to it from here (can't link from twitter/reddit on this computer) but BSG is catching a little flack for the something he said in the originally released (now edited out of the re-released) Cousin Sal podcat-- he said "some new nerd culture movie came out—shanghai? the shanghai express? shang chi? who knows but we broke it ...", got criticized for it (saying Asian names sound alike is not exactly the cutting edge of humor), and edited out of the podcast.

He really is stuck in 1986 sometimes.
For the 1000th time, he needs to replace his dopey nephew as his producer. This doesn't seem like a huge deal (Marvel plays the difficulty of pronouncing Shang Chi for laughs in the trailer) but not having a real producer will end his career sooner than later.
 

Kliq

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This was last week, but did anyone catch what Warren Sharp said on his podcast with Simmons and House about Aaron Rodgers? He said that he thinks Rodgers would play one more season in Green Bay and then go to Denver; with one of the motivations being that it would get him out of the same conference as Tom Brady. WTF is he talking about? It all kind of comes out at once with Sharp, but it seemed like a really crazy explanation for why Rodgers would want to go to Denver.
 

luckiestman

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This was last week, but did anyone catch what Warren Sharp said on his podcast with Simmons and House about Aaron Rodgers? He said that he thinks Rodgers would play one more season in Green Bay and then go to Denver; with one of the motivations being that it would get him out of the same conference as Tom Brady. WTF is he talking about? It all kind of comes out at once with Sharp, but it seemed like a really crazy explanation for why Rodgers would want to go to Denver.

I did hear something like that but didn’t put much stock in it. I am very unimpressed by Sharp as a podcaster, he might be good at gambling but he uses too many weasels words and doesn’t speak directly. Seems like he will be on more shows so I hope he gets better.
 

Kliq

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I did hear something like that but didn’t put much stock in it. I am very unimpressed by Sharp as a podcaster, he might be good at gambling but he uses too many weasels words and doesn’t speak directly. Seems like he will be on more shows so I hope he gets better.
Sharp strikes me as a very knowledgeable guy who hasn't quite figured out how to do podcasting yet. He talks really fast and gives out a ton of information, but it's not in a particularly digestible format.
 

bbc23

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For the 1000th time, he needs to replace his dopey nephew as his producer. This doesn't seem like a huge deal (Marvel plays the difficulty of pronouncing Shang Chi for laughs in the trailer) but not having a real producer will end his career sooner than later.
He definitely was making a stupid joke because of how proud he is of mispronouncing names and deserves to catch flack for it. I absolutely agree on him needing a new producer that is actually able to stand up to him every once in a while, but Kyle is legitimately wonderful on Life Advice with Russillo and that segment has surpassed anything BS has going for him right now.
 

JCizzle

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Sharp strikes me as a very knowledgeable guy who hasn't quite figured out how to do podcasting yet. He talks really fast and gives out a ton of information, but it's not in a particularly digestible format.
Can't wait for three podcasts a week regarding coaches who run too frequently on first down and why he can't give out gambling advice because it's for paying customers only. I had high hopes going into last year, but he's been a letdown. I ended up listening for Vernon and House last year rather than Sharp.
 

johnmd20

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I did hear something like that but didn’t put much stock in it. I am very unimpressed by Sharp as a podcaster, he might be good at gambling but he uses too many weasels words and doesn’t speak directly. Seems like he will be on more shows so I hope he gets better.
Sharp is truly insufferable. He's an auto skip whenever he's on a podcast. He does use too many words and he's so full of himself.
 

jcd0805

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This was last week, but did anyone catch what Warren Sharp said on his podcast with Simmons and House about Aaron Rodgers? He said that he thinks Rodgers would play one more season in Green Bay and then go to Denver; with one of the motivations being that it would get him out of the same conference as Tom Brady. WTF is he talking about? It all kind of comes out at once with Sharp, but it seemed like a really crazy explanation for why Rodgers would want to go to Denver.
I mean, Tampa Bay is NFC and Green Bay is NFC so, to leave and go to Denver in the AFC gets him out of the NFC. Peyton Manning has said people said to him when he left Indy to go to an NFC team so he wouldn't have the Pats in the way of getting to the Super Bowl every year so it's not a totally ludicrous idea.
 

jcd0805

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He definitely was making a stupid joke because of how proud he is of mispronouncing names and deserves to catch flack for it. I absolutely agree on him needing a new producer that is actually able to stand up to him every once in a while, but Kyle is legitimately wonderful on Life Advice with Russillo and that segment has surpassed anything BS has going for him right now.
I adore life advice, favorite part of any pod I listen to.
 

Foxy42

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I adore life advice, favorite part of any pod I listen to.
Fully agree. I get to life advice and stop so I can save them up and then have an hour or two of life advice when I’m working in the yard. Ryen reading his 2008, ‘to do’ list recently was gold.
 

Kliq

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I mean, Tampa Bay is NFC and Green Bay is NFC so, to leave and go to Denver in the AFC gets him out of the NFC. Peyton Manning has said people said to him when he left Indy to go to an NFC team so he wouldn't have the Pats in the way of getting to the Super Bowl every year so it's not a totally ludicrous idea.
Well, Brady, as superhuman he is, is 44. I don't know about leaving the NFC to get away from Brady, only to wade into the same division as Mahomes, and thinking that would be the primary motivation.
 

johnmd20

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Van Lathan on Simmons' podcast today was outrageously good. Holy Cow is that guy hilarious. The last 10 minutes, especially. He really is something special.
 

TheGazelle

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Van Lathan on Simmons' podcast today was outrageously good. Holy Cow is that guy hilarious. The last 10 minutes, especially. He really is something special.
Yeah, he's great. He's a +++ addition to any podcast. Hell, I listened to a podcast where he and Fennessy spent 90 minutes talking about M. Night Shamaylan movies, of which I've seen less than half, and was thoroughly entertained because of Van's takes.
 

johnmd20

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Yeah, he's great. He's a +++ addition to any podcast. Hell, I listened to a podcast where he and Fennessy spent 90 minutes talking about M. Night Shamaylan movies, of which I've seen less than half, and was thoroughly entertained because of Van's takes.
In the latest podcast, him talking about Mallory and saying, "And she came into this ridiculous thing like Clarence Darrow," was just so funny.
 

jmcc5400

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Nothing funnier than the list of things Bill thinks Miami Vice invented.
'Montages with cool music... never been done before!'
Slow motion shootouts.

Chris: Well, Peckinpah . . .

Bill: No, I mean TV!

(still a really fun pod if you were around for Miami Vice. Bill is right that it looked like nothing else on television. And as for PMT's overacting, "He's going after number eiiiighhht . . . he's going after Sonny," has been part of my sister's and my repertoire since 1984.)
 

Bunt4aTriple

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I just started part 1 of Calderone's Return. They're available with commercials on the NBC app if you don't have peacock. I had never seen MV before this, other than the movie.
 

luckiestman

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Nothing funnier than the list of things Bill thinks Miami Vice invented.
'Montages with cool music... never been done before!'

I loved it particularly because I knew it was going to hit SoSH. I have a mental checklist of SoSH moments when listening.
 

Spelunker

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I just started part 1 of Calderone's Return. They're available with commercials on the NBC app if you don't have peacock. I had never seen MV before this, other than the movie.
May have just been me, but there's an increasing prevalence of jumpy edit issues in ep 2.
 

TheGazelle

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Simmons picking the Pats to win the Super Bowl is definitely his all time low.

I am embarrassed for him.
Is this on today's pod? Sal laughing at him as Billy Big Bucks declared all of the Pats futures to be absolute locks was hilarious, but that's incredible.
 

johnmd20

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Is this on today's pod? Sal laughing at him as Billy Big Bucks declared all of the Pats futures to be absolute locks was hilarious, but that's incredible.
Today's pod.

He went on to say the Pats got three blue chippers in the draft. The Pats have played a total of 0 plays year to date.

Today was epic. Ol Billy Big Bucks is really feelin' it.

The Pats winning the Super Bowl pick is historic. And he specifically said it wasn't a homer pick, he did the research. Did you Bill? Did you really research a guy who has never thrown a pass in NFL history? Rookie QBs always win SBs, so I guess it makes sense.
 

88 MVP

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Simmons picking the Pats to win the Super Bowl is definitely his all time low.

I am embarrassed for him.
I mean… sheesh. While Simmons clearly believes in the team this year (I do too!), the entire bit was mostly tongue in cheek. I loved the 4 minute monologue playing out his fantasy of the team paralleling the ‘01 team and Belichick vanquishing old enemies along the way to the Super Bowl matchup that would break the internet. It was a fun, at least semi-plausible, scenario to think about (and a Bucs-Pats SB is a fun way to gamble a few dollars at 70-1).

It was the most entertaining part of my morning commute. LFG!
 

nattysez

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I came here to post about how much I loved his "Pats win the SB" monologue. It was a hilarious listen and got me fired up for the season. When the games start and I come back to reality, BSG's vision will just be a distant happy memory.
 

jacklamabe65

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IIRC:
-at 13 years old, his son skateboards to places Bill doesn't know anything about and hangs out with people Bill doesn't know every day. Bill thinks there are girls involved. Bill proudly cites this as "70s-80s parenting."
- Bill's proffered solution to this is to send him to an all-boys school.
- But his son wants to play football, which for reasons I believe were unexplained makes the all-boys school less viable.

Prior to that, Bill shared a story about his wife screaming at his daughter so vociferously in the car that she had to pull over. Part of the issue was that his daughter was at a party with 100 people at which her purse with her driver's permit in it was stolen.

Happy to be corrected if I have any of that wrong.
Bill also attended an all-boys school in Greenwich, Brunswick, for high school after attending The Greenwich Country Day School (oo-ed) in his middle school years.
 

bankshot1

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Just listened to the Simmons Superbowl HOT TAKE.

I thought it was pretty entertaining.

He clearly labels it as a narrative he wants to ride all season, he just needs a rookie QB to buy into his hot take, and play along, and play and beat some pretty good teams in Buffalo, Clevland, KC, and ultimately Tampa.
What could go wrong?

IMO Bill should be viewed as the anti-Felger, where Felger is the contrarian buzzkill, finding the hot take to irritate as many listeners as possible. where Bill remains a fan at heart and sees the fun.

Felger is the wet blanket, Bill the wet dream.
 

JCizzle

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Just listened to the Simmons Superbowl HOT TAKE.

I thought it was pretty entertaining.

He clearly labels it as a narrative he wants to ride all season, he just needs a rookie QB to buy into his hot take, and play along, and play and beat some pretty good teams in Buffalo, Clevland, KC, and ultimately Tampa.
What could go wrong?

IMO Bill should be viewed as the anti-Felger, where Felger is the contrarian buzzkill, finding the hot take to irritate as many listeners as possible. where Bill remains a fan at heart and sees the fun.

Felger is the wet blanket, Bill the wet dream.
I’ll put Chad Finn in a tag team with Bill in the anti-Felger world, as T&R correctly pointed out recently!
 

Shelterdog

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I knew it was bad sign when Simmons went all in on the Pats.

You'd make a lot of money betting against Simmons NFL picks.
BSG super entertaining guy and I like listening to a lot of his stuff but it's madness to listen to his NFL takes. To take one dumb example he's been pumping up Pitts, got him on his fantasy team, said Pitts has a floor of Kelce etc. Now he's upset that Kyle Pitts--who he said has a floor of Kelce--looked small in "wide receiver pads" instead of looking like Gronk or Kelce. Well fuck, Pitts weighed 245 at the combine (some people thought he played lighter)--Kelce is listed at 260 and Gronk at 265, and they're all about the same height, so he's giving up 15-20 pounds or more. If Simmons has seen Pitts play he might have noticed that he looks like Plaxico Burress he's a very very big wide receiver but not someone like Gronk who you think could maybe possibly play LT if he beefed up. "I was upset that a player I'm touting isn't as big as I thought he was suggests he's been going on about the guy without watching him play.
 

johnmd20

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BSG super entertaining guy and I like listening to a lot of his stuff but it's madness to listen to his NFL takes. To take one dumb example he's been pumping up Pitts, got him on his fantasy team, said Pitts has a floor of Kelce etc. Now he's upset that Kyle Pitts--who he said has a floor of Kelce--looked small in "wide receiver pads" instead of looking like Gronk or Kelce. Well fuck, Pitts weighed 245 at the combine (some people thought he played lighter)--Kelce is listed at 260 and Gronk at 265, and they're all about the same height, so he's giving up 15-20 pounds or more. If Simmons has seen Pitts play he might have noticed that he looks like Plaxico Burress he's a very very big wide receiver but not someone like Gronk who you think could maybe possibly play LT if he beefed up. "I was upset that a player I'm touting isn't as big as I thought he was suggests he's been going on about the guy without watching him play.
I loved the, "Pitts has the floor of Kelce," take quake. Kelce is the only TE in the history of the position to gain 1000 yards or more in 5 straight seasons. So Pitts' floor is, um, better than one of the greatest TEs of all time. THE FLOOR.

Yes, his NFL takes are nonsense now. Far worse than they have ever been. There isn't even an iota of thought put into any of it, it's all off the cuff nonsense.