Would the Celtics Bench Make the Playoffs?

[Batman Likes The Sox]

The Celtics starting five suddenly disappears.

Celtics have to play the full 24-25 season without their starters.

Some combo of the bench is your starting lineup (for example, but it’s your choice: Al, Payton, Sam, Luke, Neemias) and assume that the new bench players are replacement level.

Where does the new team finish for the season?

 

[HomeRunBaker]

It isn’t so much that your second unit become the starters but that non-NBA players are now in your rotation playing key minutes. Let’s not even talk about what happens with a few injuries along the way.

 

[tims4wins]

It isn’t so much that your second unit become the starters but that non-NBA players are now in your rotation playing key minutes. Let’s not even talk about what happens with a few injuries along the way.

Right if they could have the current bench become the starters, but also remain the bench guys, they’d be fine. Replacing the bench with… replacement level players would be a disaster.

 

[Van Everyman]

Calling that shit a shooting foul is disgraceful

 

[Batman Likes The Sox]

Calling that shit a shooting foul is disgraceful

Yo calm down man

 

[Van Everyman]

Whoops, wrong thread

 

[benhogan]

The Celtics starting five suddenly disappears.

Celtics have to play the full 24-25 season without their starters.

Some combo of the bench is your starting lineup (for example, but it’s your choice: Al, Payton, Sam, Luke, Neemias) and assume that the new bench players are replacement level.

Where does the new team finish for the season?

I'm a HUGE fan of the bench BUT a big part of the reason they are so good is because they play with the JAYs.

Hauser, Al, PP are high end role players, nothing wrong with that. In fact it's exactly what Brad wants (you don't want a ball dominant Terry Rozier playing for his next contract as your 8th man)

PLUS if PP/Hauser got the opponents best defender + doubled nightly they'd be worn down to a nub by XMas

Lottery team IMO.

 

[128]

Calling that shit a shooting foul is disgraceful

The one where the Utah player clearly was passing to a teammate in the lane?

 

[Euclis20]

Right if they could have the current bench become the starters, but also remain the bench guys, they’d be fine. Replacing the bench with… replacement level players would be a disaster.

Yeah if White/Holiday/Brown/Tatum/Porzingis were replaced in the rotation by 5 guys were on the same level as Horford/Pritchard/Hauser/Kornet (limited players with pretty visible weaknesses but also some elite NBA skills), I think this would be a play in team that is competitive night to night in the regular season, but gets smoked whenever a team with all-star level talent decides to take the game seriously.

If the starting 5 is gone and we just replace the roster spots with NBA minimum guys, it'd be rough. We'd immediately have the worst wing situation in the league. Hauser gets to guard the opposing team's best wing, and Walsh/Scheierman/Craig all have major roles, with 1-2 of them having to start. Pritchard is great but he's shown that when teams put good defenders on him, he can be shut down (and in this scenario, he'd get the opponent's best perimeter defender every night). He'd expend all his energy on offense (because no one else can create their own shot), and his defense would suffer tremendously. I don't think that two of Walsh/Queta/Kornet can be on the floor at the same time. It would be ugly, and in contention for the #1 pick.

This isn't any kind of statement on our bench, I think any team in the league (and just about any team in history) would be in a similar situation.

 

[Van Everyman]

The one where the Utah player clearly was passing to a teammate in the lane?

It was the play where Jaylen and another a Jazz guy went to the floor for a ball and the guy picked up the ball and as soon as he heard the whistle threw it toward the basket.

 

[lars10]

Are there two Pritchards?.. and can they both play at the same time if there are two of each of the five players?

 

[the moops]

That team is terrible. Who is covering the opposing teams best wings? Hauser? Such non existent play making on that team. Shot clock is winding down the only hope is what a Pritchard step back?

 

[CaptainLaddie]

Wait, can we factor in the whole "disaster draft" scenario?

 

[lovegtm]

That team is terrible. Who is covering the opposing teams best wings? Hauser? Such non existent play making on that team. Shot clock is winding down the only hope is what a Pritchard step back?

Yeah, that team would be almost completely unable to create shots.

 

[the moops]

This isn't any kind of statement on our bench, I think any team in the league (and just about any team in history) would be in a similar situation.

Would be a fun exercise. What team would have the most success if their next 5 started. Hard to figure out who is the next 5 for some teams though.

 

[lovegtm]

Would be a fun exercise. What team would have the most success if their next 5 started. Hard to figure out who is the next 5 for some teams though.

As you implicitly noted earlier, the weird thing about the exercise is that it heavily rewards teams who happen to have pure shot creators on the bench, as opposed to staggering starters to maintain playmaking (which is what almost all good teams do now).

 

[chilidawg]

Whoops, wrong thread

Never the wrong thread for righteous indignation!

 

[benhogan]

Would be a fun exercise. What team would have the most success if their next 5 started. Hard to figure out who is the next 5 for some teams though.

Wallace, Joe, Caruso, Wiggins, JayWill, Kenrich, Dieng ... with a gazillion picks on the way

I have OKC-envy

 

[benhogan]

It isn’t so much that your second unit become the starters but that non-NBA players are now in your rotation playing key minutes. Let’s not even talk about what happens with a few injuries along the way.

Help is a phone call away... Yam Madar and Juhann Begarin on the first flight

 

[LoLsapien]

Wait, can we factor in the whole "disaster draft" scenario?

View attachment 97939

This is good. I legit LOL'd and I'm here for the carnage.

Edit: this exercise is basically the Mavs

 

[Pablo's TB Lover]

Wait, can we factor in the whole "disaster draft" scenario?

View attachment 97939

Am I garbage in playing out this whole scenario? Like the FAA controversy is just sitting there ready to explain away how a few of your players could coincidentally be involved in separate plane crashes. And NYC random shootings, amirite. What would raise the level of concern from Silver or frankly anyone else in the league on a human level, even before suspecting foul play from the players' own team? The remaining players would basically be transported in an armored car to and from games and practices before the body count got to 5 players, right?!

 

[ALiveH]

chatgpt is working on this script for me as we speak.

Title: Disaster Draft
Genre: Sports Thriller / Conspiracy / Mystery

Synopsis:

In professional basketball, one rule is feared above all: the Disaster Draft. If a team loses five players under extraordinary circumstances, the league forces a full reset—every other franchise protects five players, while the affected team is left to rebuild from the league’s unprotected sixth men. It’s a safeguard against catastrophe. It’s never been triggered—until now.

The New York Titans, the top seed and heavy championship favorites, are in crisis. Four of their starting five have died under mysterious circumstances—a car crash, a drowning, a sudden illness, and a shocking on-court collapse. With only one more loss needed to trigger the Disaster Draft, the entire franchise hinges on Jalen Cross, the team’s lone surviving star. If he dies, the Titans' season is over, their roster is stripped, and their dynasty crumbles overnight.

To keep him safe, the team and league take extraordinary measures—24/7 security, hidden locations, restricted travel. No risks. No mistakes. But as Jalen prepares for the biggest playoff run of his career, he starts receiving cryptic threats and realizes the truth: this isn’t random. Someone is engineering these deaths.

As the finals approach, Jalen partners with a rogue league official, a journalist uncovering a cover-up, and a former teammate’s widow to unravel the conspiracy. What they discover is bigger than basketball—a dark alliance of corrupt league executives, high-stakes gambling syndicates, and ruthless owners willing to kill to reshape the league.

Now, Jalen faces the ultimate choice: keep playing and risk his life, or walk away and let the league bury the truth.

But the most terrifying question remains: who’s next?

Tagline:

Four down. One to go. The only way to win… is to survive.

 

[LoLsapien]

 

[Lose Remerswaal]

I’d stream that.

 

[Bunt4aTriple]

chatgpt is working on this script for me as we speak.

Title: Disaster Draft
Genre: Sports Thriller / Conspiracy / Mystery

Synopsis:

In professional basketball, one rule is feared above all: the Disaster Draft. If a team loses five players under extraordinary circumstances, the league forces a full reset—every other franchise protects five players, while the affected team is left to rebuild from the league’s unprotected sixth men. It’s a safeguard against catastrophe. It’s never been triggered—until now.

The New York Titans, the top seed and heavy championship favorites, are in crisis. Four of their starting five have died under mysterious circumstances—a car crash, a drowning, a sudden illness, and a shocking on-court collapse. With only one more loss needed to trigger the Disaster Draft, the entire franchise hinges on Jalen Cross, the team’s lone surviving star. If he dies, the Titans' season is over, their roster is stripped, and their dynasty crumbles overnight.

To keep him safe, the team and league take extraordinary measures—24/7 security, hidden locations, restricted travel. No risks. No mistakes. But as Jalen prepares for the biggest playoff run of his career, he starts receiving cryptic threats and realizes the truth: this isn’t random. Someone is engineering these deaths.

As the finals approach, Jalen partners with a rogue league official, a journalist uncovering a cover-up, and a former teammate’s widow to unravel the conspiracy. What they discover is bigger than basketball—a dark alliance of corrupt league executives, high-stakes gambling syndicates, and ruthless owners willing to kill to reshape the league.

Now, Jalen faces the ultimate choice: keep playing and risk his life, or walk away and let the league bury the truth.

But the most terrifying question remains: who’s next?

Tagline:

Four down. One to go. The only way to win… is to survive.

It's like if Harlan Coben and Matt Christopher smoked PCP.

 

[wade boggs chicken dinner]

chatgpt is working on this script for me as we speak.

Title: Disaster Draft
Genre: Sports Thriller / Conspiracy / Mystery

Synopsis:

In professional basketball, one rule is feared above all: the Disaster Draft. If a team loses five players under extraordinary circumstances, the league forces a full reset—every other franchise protects five players, while the affected team is left to rebuild from the league’s unprotected sixth men. It’s a safeguard against catastrophe. It’s never been triggered—until now.

The New York Titans, the top seed and heavy championship favorites, are in crisis. Four of their starting five have died under mysterious circumstances—a car crash, a drowning, a sudden illness, and a shocking on-court collapse. With only one more loss needed to trigger the Disaster Draft, the entire franchise hinges on Jalen Cross, the team’s lone surviving star. If he dies, the Titans' season is over, their roster is stripped, and their dynasty crumbles overnight.

To keep him safe, the team and league take extraordinary measures—24/7 security, hidden locations, restricted travel. No risks. No mistakes. But as Jalen prepares for the biggest playoff run of his career, he starts receiving cryptic threats and realizes the truth: this isn’t random. Someone is engineering these deaths.

As the finals approach, Jalen partners with a rogue league official, a journalist uncovering a cover-up, and a former teammate’s widow to unravel the conspiracy. What they discover is bigger than basketball—a dark alliance of corrupt league executives, high-stakes gambling syndicates, and ruthless owners willing to kill to reshape the league.

Now, Jalen faces the ultimate choice: keep playing and risk his life, or walk away and let the league bury the truth.

But the most terrifying question remains: who’s next?

Tagline:

Four down. One to go. The only way to win… is to survive.

why would they kill the starting 5 and how could they make the playoffs with the remaining players?

Sorry, sometimes I’m way too literal.

 

[benhogan]

I’d stream that.

Then again you binge watched all 6 seasons of This Is Us

 

[Auger34]

Then again you binge watched all 6 seasons of This Is Us

I was just about to say Disaster Draft sounds like a Dan Fogelman show

 

[Devizier]

Disaster Draft definitely strikes me as something more like a slasher movie, with some crazed fan trying to kill off enough members of the 1996-1997 Celtics so that they can draft Toni Kukoc and John Starks.

 

[joe dokes]

chatgpt is working on this script for me as we speak.

Title: Disaster Draft
Genre: Sports Thriller / Conspiracy / Mystery

Synopsis:

In professional basketball, one rule is feared above all: the Disaster Draft. If a team loses five players under extraordinary circumstances, the league forces a full reset—every other franchise protects five players, while the affected team is left to rebuild from the league’s unprotected sixth men. It’s a safeguard against catastrophe. It’s never been triggered—until now.

The New York Titans, the top seed and heavy championship favorites, are in crisis. Four of their starting five have died under mysterious circumstances—a car crash, a drowning, a sudden illness, and a shocking on-court collapse. With only one more loss needed to trigger the Disaster Draft, the entire franchise hinges on Jalen Cross, the team’s lone surviving star. If he dies, the Titans' season is over, their roster is stripped, and their dynasty crumbles overnight.

To keep him safe, the team and league take extraordinary measures—24/7 security, hidden locations, restricted travel. No risks. No mistakes. But as Jalen prepares for the biggest playoff run of his career, he starts receiving cryptic threats and realizes the truth: this isn’t random. Someone is engineering these deaths.

As the finals approach, Jalen partners with a rogue league official, a journalist uncovering a cover-up, and a former teammate’s widow to unravel the conspiracy. What they discover is bigger than basketball—a dark alliance of corrupt league executives, high-stakes gambling syndicates, and ruthless owners willing to kill to reshape the league.

Now, Jalen faces the ultimate choice: keep playing and risk his life, or walk away and let the league bury the truth.

But the most terrifying question remains: who’s next?

Tagline:

Four down. One to go. The only way to win… is to survive.

The latest in the Kenzie and Gennaro series.

 

[benhogan]

I was just about to say Disaster Draft sounds like a Dan Fogelman show

network TV is just the worst...Disaster Draft would fit right into NBCs Fall Schedule

 

[Red Right Ankle]

I was just about to say Disaster Draft sounds like a Dan Fogelman show

Or a Bill Simmons podcast subject.

"I gotta go Krakatoa at #1. It has longevity and career peak on lockdown. Not just nearby tsunamis and pyroclastic flows causing massive death tolls in the immediate aftermath; it lowered the temperature in the Northern Hemisphere by nearly a full degree for a whole summer and caused bright red sunsets on the other side of the world for years!"

 

[astrozombie]

I love the Stay Ready Crew, but this sounds like another version of "would the winner of the College Football championship beat the worst team in the NFL?" argument and the answer is always no. That said, if *every* team hypothetically lost their starting five and had to compete with their depth, that would be an interesting question. In that case I think the Celtics are towards the top, certainly of the East.

 

[bsj]

I feel like thats a team that would be a lottery team but could be within a game or two of the play-in. Say 11 seed.

 

[the moops]

I feel like thats a team that would be a lottery team but could be within a game or two of the play-in. Say 11 seed.

Of course they are a lottery team. And if we are assuming full health, they would for sure be battling for the worts record in the league.

 

[LoLsapien]

Then again you binge watched all 6 seasons of This Is Us

I really liked This Is Us but sometime in season 5 I found myself wishing they'd kill the entire starting lineup and let the supporting cast take lead roles. I couldn't finish it.

 

[TomRicardo]

It isn’t so much that your second unit become the starters but that non-NBA players are now in your rotation playing key minutes. Let’s not even talk about what happens with a few injuries along the way.

If the Celtics were going for it I think I think they could slide into the 10 seed mostly because everyone below them would not be trying to win (Flaggstakes).

Horford
Hauser
Craig
Walsh
Pritchard

Kornet
Queta
Scheierman
Peterson
Davidson

Would be the third to fifth weakest rotation in basketball right now but well coached and disciplined applying effort could get to 30-34 wins in the East desperately losing for Flagg. Like a Brooklyn+

 

[the moops]

If the Celtics were going for it I think I think they could slide into the 10 seed mostly because everyone below them would not be trying to win (Flaggstakes).

Horford
Hauser
Craig
Walsh
Pritchard

Kornet
Queta
Scheierman
Peterson
Davidson

Would be the third to fifth weakest rotation in basketball right now but well coached and disciplined applying effort could get to 30-34 wins in the East desperately losing for Flagg. Like a Brooklyn+

May be the 3rd to 5th weakest rotation but that starting 5 is without a doubt the worst in the league. Walsh and Craig are barely rotation players nevermind competent starters

 

[TomRicardo]

May be the 3rd to 5th weakest rotation but that starting 5 is without a doubt the worst in the league. Walsh and Craig are barely rotation players nevermind competent starters

Not sure it is worse than Brooklyn or Dallas right now.

Claxton - Cameron Johnson - Cam Thomas - Keon Thomas - Ziaire Williams
Kessler Edwards - Naji Marshall - Klay Thompson - Max Christie - Dante Exum

The 76ers are awful right now as well

Gabusele - Justin Edwards - Jared Butler - Quentin Grimes - Lonnie Walker with Oubre and Drummond out.

There are some really really bleak looking teams in the NBA right now.

 

[ALiveH]

This is where Lonnie Walker would have been a real difference maker for us and Fat Frenchie.

WIth the bonus of weakening the '6ers.

 

[Pablo's TB Lover]

chatgpt is working on this script for me as we speak.

Title: Disaster Draft
Genre: Sports Thriller / Conspiracy / Mystery

Synopsis:

In professional basketball, one rule is feared above all: the Disaster Draft. If a team loses five players under extraordinary circumstances, the league forces a full reset—every other franchise protects five players, while the affected team is left to rebuild from the league’s unprotected sixth men. It’s a safeguard against catastrophe. It’s never been triggered—until now.

The New York Titans, the top seed and heavy championship favorites, are in crisis. Four of their starting five have died under mysterious circumstances—a car crash, a drowning, a sudden illness, and a shocking on-court collapse. With only one more loss needed to trigger the Disaster Draft, the entire franchise hinges on Jalen Cross, the team’s lone surviving star. If he dies, the Titans' season is over, their roster is stripped, and their dynasty crumbles overnight.

To keep him safe, the team and league take extraordinary measures—24/7 security, hidden locations, restricted travel. No risks. No mistakes. But as Jalen prepares for the biggest playoff run of his career, he starts receiving cryptic threats and realizes the truth: this isn’t random. Someone is engineering these deaths.

As the finals approach, Jalen partners with a rogue league official, a journalist uncovering a cover-up, and a former teammate’s widow to unravel the conspiracy. What they discover is bigger than basketball—a dark alliance of corrupt league executives, high-stakes gambling syndicates, and ruthless owners willing to kill to reshape the league.

Now, Jalen faces the ultimate choice: keep playing and risk his life, or walk away and let the league bury the truth.

But the most terrifying question remains: who’s next?

Tagline:

Four down. One to go. The only way to win… is to survive.

This is good, I especially like the lead character's name as a potential subtitle: 'It's his CROSS to bear.'

 

[benhogan]

I really liked This Is Us but sometime in season 5 I found myself wishing they'd kill the entire starting lineup and let the supporting cast take lead roles. I couldn't finish it.

It's probably perfectly fine but I can't help roasting primetime network dramas

 

[LoLsapien]

It's probably perfectly fine but I can't help roasting primetime network dramas

If you ever decide to open your mind, I am well versed, as my wife absolutely f###ing loves that stuff. If there's a primetime network doctor in the house, I've watched it.

Mildly relevant is that we're currently watching "Running Point" about a group of siblings that just inherited ownership of an LA-based professional basketball team from their racist philandering dad. The team is terrible but no one has suggested actually killing their players.. yet.

 

[benhogan]

If you ever decide to open your mind, I am well versed, as my wife absolutely f###ing loves that stuff. If there's a primetime network doctor in the house, I've watched it.

Mildly relevant is that we're currently watching "Running Point" about a group of siblings that just inherited ownership of an LA-based professional basketball team from their racist philandering dad. The team is terrible but no one has suggested actually killing their players.. yet.

Thanks, I like Kate Hudson. My wife is enjoying that show. I mostly main line the NBA League Pass from 4-9pm for 8 months of the year

 

[TripleOT]

Pitch that Disaster Draft treatment to Wyc’s production company.

 

[bakahump]

This is good, I especially like the lead character's name as a potential subtitle: 'It's his CROSS to bear.'

Hes in the Cross-Hairs.


And the poster would have him shooting a jump shot with Cross Hairs super imposed like looking through a scope.


And its definitely the Owner right?

 

[Pablo's TB Lover]

Hes in the Cross-Hairs.


And the poster would have him shooting a jump shot with Cross Hairs super imposed like looking through a scope.


And its definitely the Owner right?

For maximum wordplay it's got to be the Buss family as owners, right? 'He won't know the Buss that hits him.'

 

[HomeRunBaker]

If you ever decide to open your mind, I am well versed, as my wife absolutely f###ing loves that stuff. If there's a primetime network doctor in the house, I've watched it.

Mildly relevant is that we're currently watching "Running Point" about a group of siblings that just inherited ownership of an LA-based professional basketball team from their racist philandering dad. The team is terrible but no one has suggested actually killing their players.. yet.

As former Tampa Bay Buccaneers Head Coach John McKay once said when a reporter asked about his teams execution…..”I’m in favor of it.”

Maybe Coach was on to something.

 

[Batman Likes The Sox]

One of the reasons I wanted to start this is for just some fun late-season conversation, but also I was curious where folks would land about that "last place in the East or not" slot on the survey.

87% of the (generally) very intelligent voters on SoSH think that the Celtics 6-10 would not be in last place in the East.

Some of that is about the dire nature of a couple teams currently, some of that is because perhaps the Celtics in this scenario would be trying to win and others trying to tank.

But it's a pretty privileged position as a fan to be able to watch a team where the bench would be at least vaguely competitive in the league. Pretty cool whole team development by the Celtics.

 

[the moops]

One of the reasons I wanted to start this is for just some fun late-season conversation, but also I was curious where folks would land about that "last place in the East or not" slot on the survey.

87% of the (generally) very intelligent voters on SoSH think that the Celtics 6-10 would not be in last place in the East.

Some of that is about the dire nature of a couple teams currently, some of that is because perhaps the Celtics in this scenario would be trying to win and others trying to tank.

But it's a pretty privileged position as a fan to be able to watch a team where the bench would be at least vaguely competitive in the league. Pretty cool whole team development by the Celtics.

I assumed a bunch of these votes was shtick or just absurd homerism. There is no team in the league, not even our beloved Celtics, where the bench unit would be anything but the worst team in the league.

And again, I am assuming we are talking about teams being generally healthy, or at least the health of guys that are day to day and not guys who are out for the season. And someone mentioned there are some terrible tanking teams. There most certainly are, and this bench Celtic team would also be tanking for a better pick