Why Do I Continue to Read Peter King?

Leather

given himself a skunk spot
SoSH Member
Jul 18, 2005
28,451
"So bummed"

He really though that was not only an appropriate choice, but a good one. Wow.
 

E5 Yaz

Transcends message boarding
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
Apr 25, 2002
90,014
Oregon
Jose Fernandez:
Gone way too soon. So bummed for
what never will be.
So, let's parse this, shall we: "Gone way too soon," by itself, already conveys a sadness over "what will never be" -- which makes the entire third line redundant.

Jose Fernandez:
Gone way too soon. So bummed.
Of course, PK can't have that -- he needs a three-line fake haiku. So, instead of being "bummed" about some real aspect of this, he decides to be bummed about Fernandez not being able to have a long career ... as if that's the real tragedy in this.

It should go without saying that saying "bummed" or "bummer" has long since changed meaning. It's use, if at all now, is flippant, many times sarcastic in tone. So, his laziness extends past being redundant, or not thinking hard enough to gauge the true nature of the death. It's a laziness combined with an inaccurate use of slang as an attempted identifier with the reader.

Then again, this is under the hedder of Adieu Haiku, a cutesy subhed. He's making a clod-fister lack of effort about an actual farewell for his own mushbrained purposes.

Bummer
 

joe dokes

Member
SoSH Member
Jul 18, 2005
30,233
You and me on Sunday morning hearing about Fernandez:
"oh shit"
"That's Awful."
"Oh my God; didn't he just announce his girlfriend was pregnant?!"
etc.



Peter King on Sunday morning hearing about Fernandez:

(starts counting with fingers):
"Yes!! Five syllables!!"
 

John Marzano Olympic Hero

has fancy plans, and pants to match
Dope
SoSH Member
Apr 12, 2001
24,533
To follow up E5's take, you know what's a bummer?

When you knock over a milkshake
When the guy you sat in fantasy football runs for 130 yards and three touchdowns
When your DVR didn't record "Atlanta"

Those are bummers. They are small inconveniences that may or not may be remedied by finding a workaround that could be a slight inconvenience.

A death? That's not a bummer. Especially this one. This is a tragedy.

For a guy who has written a half-dozen books, has a weekly football column, tweets incessantly and has written probably well more than two millions words total in his career, Peter King still knows very little about words.

THAT is a bummer.
 

Bunt4aTriple

Member (member)
Silver Supporter
SoSH Member
Jul 15, 2005
4,347
North Yarmouth, ME
Peter King was on Pardon My Take today. He is certainly willing to laugh at himself and is generally self aware. No haiku talk, but he addresses the bike lane/Robin Williams tweets. He was a good sport.
 

allstonite

Member
SoSH Member
Oct 27, 2010
2,472
Peter King was on Pardon My Take today. He is certainly willing to laugh at himself and is generally self aware. No haiku talk, but he addresses the bike lane/Robin Williams tweets. He was a good sport.
I agree he was a really good sport and it was an excellent interview. They asked him some difficult questions about his clueless tweeting but without feeling like they were attacking him. It was pretty much how I feel about him. He's not mean spirited or a bad person, he just occasionally "eats the trash."

I also thought their other questions and his answers on other things around the NFL were great especially related to the CBA and drugs. I especially liked Peter's idea that Goodell have a weekly interview with one of his enemies in the media (Simmons, Nichols, etc.) It'll never happen but I'm glad he's kind of calling Goodell out a little for not being available.

It just shocked me that he came across that well in this type of venue and it's the same guy that unironically writes those inane tweets every few weeks.
 

Bunt4aTriple

Member (member)
Silver Supporter
SoSH Member
Jul 15, 2005
4,347
North Yarmouth, ME
I just watched their "exit interview" as well and it's hilarious. Maybe this belongs in the podcast thread, but the PMT guys are probably hurt a bit by their Barstool label. They're smart, funny and for the most part good-natured. It just seems like they have a ton of fun.

 

CantKeepmedown

Member
SoSH Member
Jul 15, 2005
2,579
Portland, ME
I am stunned at how well PK came off on this.

I just watched their "exit interview" as well and it's hilarious. Maybe this belongs in the podcast thread, but the PMT guys are probably hurt a bit by their Barstool label. They're smart, funny and for the most part good-natured. It just seems like they have a ton of fun.
It's probably best that Big Cat and PFT were able to do the piece with him, because Portnoy would have just been in attack mode and probably got a much different reaction out of King.
 

ifmanis5

Member
SoSH Member
Sep 29, 2007
63,740
Rotten Apple
This is great news. Those Manhattan drives can be so taxing.
Also, using the Royal We to include his wife?
s. Uber alert: For the first time in 36 years, we are car-free. And thrilled about it. After five years of being city-dwellers with a car, we decided that 83-minute “drives” in Manhattan to go 7 miles (which has happened) simply had to go. And so we’ll rent when we need a car, and take the subway and walk and ride a bike at other times, and be much happier.
 

Marciano490

Urological Expert
SoSH Member
Nov 4, 2007
62,312
Isn't the whole island less than 7 miles? Must be nice to not even have to mention that garaging a car here costs more than a lease on anything below a 5 series.
 

Dotrat

Well-Known Member
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
Jul 11, 2002
2,135
Morris County NJ
Isn't the whole island less than 7 miles? Must be nice to not even have to mention that garaging a car here costs more than a lease on anything below a 5 series.
About 13 miles long and 2+ at its widest point, 14th Street. And while garages are an unconscionable ripoff, the subway is always an option, at least for us peasants.
 

Senator Donut

post-Domer
SoSH Member
Apr 21, 2010
5,500
About 13 miles long and 2+ at its widest point, 14th Street. And while garages are an unconscionable ripoff, the subway is always an option, at least for us peasants.
I'm fairness to Marciano, do you think Peter King ever ventures into the northernmost six miles of Manhatten?
 

joe dokes

Member
SoSH Member
Jul 18, 2005
30,233
I doubt he ever ventures too far away from the East Side between 57th and 96th.
The not-East Side is a verrrry dangerous place:

Slice of New York Life Dept.:
Manhattan’s Upper West Side, Saturday, 3:30 p.m., Broadway and 78th, 25-ish woman walking south on a crowded sidewalk, on her cellphone, waaaaay too loud, as people stare:
“WHERE ARE YOU GUYS? I’LL MEET YOU … YEAH … I JUST GOT MY EYEBROWS DONE. TOOK ME LONGER THAN I THOUGHT … NO, EYEBROWS!”
Um, the folks over in Fort Lee can hear you, miss. And they’re all staring at your eyebrows.

e. Coffeenerdness: Bizarro pet coffee peeve of mine: people who order cold drinks, then put heavy-paper sleeves on them.
Maybe its so the condensation on the outside of the cup doesn't drip all over their clothes because they aren't all wearing whatever track suit/sweatshirt get up that they got for free form somebody happy that you gave them 3 lines of ink.
 

E5 Yaz

Transcends message boarding
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
Apr 25, 2002
90,014
Oregon
CBS war correspondent Elizabeth Palmer is such a gem. When I watch her reporting life-and-death stories from Aleppo, such as the one with two children killed by a stray mortar attack, I say, “What a role model for all reporters.”
Funny, I say "When are we going to stop killing children?"
 

John Marzano Olympic Hero

has fancy plans, and pants to match
Dope
SoSH Member
Apr 12, 2001
24,533
Man, there is nothing worse than people bitching about people who are loud on the phone. No shit, Einstein, it's annoying but it's kind of SOP now especially among the self-absorbed. Speaking of self-absorbed, Peter King was told to be quiet on a quiet car once because he couldn't resist talking on his phone. Oh yeah, he was mad about that too.

So pot, this is kettle. You two can kindly shut the fuck up now.
 

Leather

given himself a skunk spot
SoSH Member
Jul 18, 2005
28,451
Peter King is the worst music fan ever.

f. Thanks for getting me cross-country twice in six days, Bob Dylan. In honor of your Nobel Prize for Literature, I listened to “The Freewheeling’ Bob Dylan” and the double album “The Essential Bob Dylan.” Twice.
A) Misspell the name of supposed favorite album? Check.
B) Call a compilation an "album"? Check.
C) Exclaim that said "Greatest Hits Album" is your other favorite "album"? Check.

Jesus.
 

SydneySox

A dash of cool to add the heat
SoSH Member
Sep 19, 2005
15,605
The Eastern Suburbs
That's, like, literally the best thing ever. Yeah, he misspelled Freewheelin' but I would also guarantee he really just listened to Blowin' in the Wind a bunch of times and skipped over Hard Rain and Don't Think Twice before going straight to the goddamned Greatest Hits album.

What a fan.
 

Leather

given himself a skunk spot
SoSH Member
Jul 18, 2005
28,451
Hey. He listened to two of Dylan's approximately 75 collections of songs, man.

Twice!

In other news, I just want to give a shout out to The Bard himself, Ol' Bill Shakespeare. In honor of his greatness, I read Hamlet's soliloquy and watched Kenneth Branagh's "Henry V" on my iPad.

Twice.

Gosh, he was a genius.
 

riboflav

Member
SoSH Member
Jan 20, 2006
9,579
NOVA
So, has Pete weighed in on Josh Brown and the Giants' role in covering up his history of abusing his wife?
 

luckiestman

Son of the Harpy
SoSH Member
Jul 15, 2005
32,617
The not-East Side is a verrrry dangerous place:






Maybe its so the condensation on the outside of the cup doesn't drip all over their clothes because they aren't all wearing whatever track suit/sweatshirt get up that they got for free form somebody happy that you gave them 3 lines of ink.

This mofo would love me, I wrap the drink in a napkin pre-sleeving (lay napkin flat, place drink in middle, pull up napkin, secure in place with cardboard sleeve)
 

E5 Yaz

Transcends message boarding
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
Apr 25, 2002
90,014
Oregon
HERO OF THE WEEK

Keith Washington, side judge, New England-Buffalo game. At first, during the Pats-Bills game when Tom Brady threw a pass intended for Chris Hogan near the Buffalo goal line, it looked like a flag came from the end zone. That was no flag. The object bounced, and the more you looked at it, the more you said, It can’t be. Oh, it be. After the play, a couple of Bills looked at it, and I do believe if they weren’t wearing their helmets, we would have seen them laughing. Then Washington walked toward the rubber object, stared at it, seemed to say, Well, I’m certainly not picking that up, and kicked it toward the sideline, where it finally disappeared into the crowd.
 

ifmanis5

Member
SoSH Member
Sep 29, 2007
63,740
Rotten Apple
Flurries outside my window in New York late Sunday night.
Where do you live again?

I went to South Carolina on Wednesday to do a story
Wonder if he'll pat himself on the back because he went to see the "Real America?"....

Anyway … you get insulated spending a lot of time on the coasts, as this recent election showed.
Yup.

As we’ve seen all over the country, we just haven’t had enough rain to tamp down the hazards for these huge fires.
King's a man who can do both.
 

E5 Yaz

Transcends message boarding
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
Apr 25, 2002
90,014
Oregon
The most PeterKingiest note of many a moon is in the MMQB this week. Let's see if you can find it
 

Saints Rest

Well-Known Member
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
I'm going with:
Two Bobcats spoke late Sunday afternoon. At the end of our conversation, just before hanging up, Steelers safety Mike Mitchell (Ohio University class of 2009) said to Peter King (Ohio University class of 1979): “Good talking to you, Mr. King. OU, Oh Yeah.” Then he was gone. That wasn’t a thing when I was in Athens.

III


Mike Mitchell’s birthday: June 10, 1987.

Peter King’s birthday: June 10, 1957
 

MyDaughterLovesTomGordon

Member
SoSH Member
Jun 26, 2006
14,181
I just saw on Twitter that King is promoting "My attempt at an oral history of Chris Berman."

I'm thinking PK has no idea what "oral history" means. No, Pete, it doesn't mean gathering a bunch of quotes about a person.
 

E5 Yaz

Transcends message boarding
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
Apr 25, 2002
90,014
Oregon
I just saw on Twitter that King is promoting "My attempt at an oral history of Chris Berman."

I'm thinking PK has no idea what "oral history" means. No, Pete, it doesn't mean gathering a bunch of quotes about a person.
I skimmed through it. Filled with platitudes from the usual suspects (and Tom Brady). But for a history of Berman, you'd have thought King would have gotten a quote from Bob Ley
 

joe dokes

Member
SoSH Member
Jul 18, 2005
30,233
They had me at:

Chris Berman: ‘The Vin Scully of the NFL’

Scully's play-by-play work on CBS was better than any game Berman ever did.

Chris Berman, who has been with ESPN since 1979, has agreed to dial back his workload for the network in 2017, at age 61.
So, if Berman sits around and farts on TV for another 27 years, he'd be the same age as Scully when he retired. In fact, I cant think of a single way that Chris Berman is like Vin Scully. I think they both have 2 eyes.

Of course, it was:
BILL POLIAN: Boomer is in status, if not style, the Vin Scully of cable television and of the NFL.
 
Last edited:

E5 Yaz

Transcends message boarding
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
Apr 25, 2002
90,014
Oregon
Aaron Rodgers gets paid by State Farm to be a spokesman. The MMQB gets paid by State Farm to be a sponsor. Aaron Rodgers has a heck of a game on Sunday. Peter, please. You have been covering the NFL for a long time and you have been doing it well. So well that you have managed to build your own business around your trade. Of course you should report on Aaron Rodgers’ exploits. No apologies or “tricky…cheesy” feelings are necessary. It is business for you, for Aaron Rodgers, for State Farm, and for the NFL. I think most, if not all, readers of your column understand that money is the underlying driver of the NFL. When did it become politically incorrect to make a living, own/run your own business, be successful, and make a lot of money? In reality, having the ability to make the most of your opportunities, own a business, employ people, pay taxes are one part of what makes this country great. I think you have earned the trust of your readers to not think that you are a shill for State Farm in some payola scam. Keep on reporting the stories that are the stories, because you and your team do it really well.

—Mike M., Troy, Mich.

Thanks, Mike. I felt it was a good-enough angle to use, even though it would look silly and like I was overly promoting State Farm. Glad at least to you it came off okay.

http://mmqb.si.com/mmqb/2017/01/11/nfl-head-coach-vacancy-sean-mcvay-rams-mailbag
 

Harry Hooper

Well-Known Member
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
Jan 4, 2002
34,367
Oops, here's the capsule summary at http://mmqb.si.com/ of Benoit's latest article :

Fifteen years after slowing the Greatest Show on Turf and ascending to genius status, the Patriots coach faces another historically great defense in the Super Bowl. This time around, he’ll try to slow the Falcons with a different brand of defense
 

Silverdude2167

Member
SoSH Member
Oct 9, 2006
4,681
Amstredam
Oops, here's the capsule summary at http://mmqb.si.com/ of Benoit's latest article :

Fifteen years after slowing the Greatest Show on Turf and ascending to genius status, the Patriots coach faces another historically great defense in the Super Bowl. This time around, he’ll try to slow the Falcons with a different brand of defense
Somehow that error is still up. Maybe they don't read their own website
 

Carmine Hose

Member
SoSH Member
Aug 2, 2001
5,046
Dorchester, MA
The Benoit article does state that Atlanta has the best coached offense in the league. I guess that's why San Fran wanted McDaniels before settling for Shanahan.