Watching the Jones: Dazed & Confused

Leather

given himself a skunk spot
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Jul 18, 2005
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Who cares? A media shitstorm of what? Player may have partied, turned himself in to police, was fine, no charges.

Oh my god! Scandal!
 

dcmissle

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If Gronk punched the coach don't you think we would know by now? I have a hard time believing that would be kept secret for this long. Someone would leak it.
I would keep all of this shit in house. They owe nobody any explanations and serving up info would only feed the frenzy. This is not like DFG. Keep a lid on, win Sunday, and then say on to denver.

And I am sorry -- anyone who thinks this is a remarkable series of coincidences is incredibly fucking naive.
 

Bleedred

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A buddy of mine (not a doctor) works with people who overdose quite a bit. His 2 cents: "The most likely explanation is that he was given pain meds for the injury and took too many by accident... it most definitely wasn't a typical overdose (opiate overdose puts your body to sleep (usually lungs)... you stop breathing and goodbye. If this had happened, he would not be at practice the next day, due to the extreme procedures involved in "bringing him back". So I'm guessing that he took enough so that he knocked himself out and whomever was with him had trouble reviving him, panicked and took him to the hospital. Other than having a really heavy sleep, he was fine and woke up ready to practice... then again, I could be completely wrong."
 

CaptainLaddie

dj paul pfieffer
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I would keep all of this shit in house. They owe nobody any explanations and serving up info would only feed the frenzy. This is not like DFG. Keep a lid on, win Sunday, and then say on to denver.

And I am sorry -- anyone who thinks this is a remarkable series of coincidences is incredibly fucking naive.
If Belichick was punched in the face by a player, it would be the biggest story in sports.

Edit: and it would be known. THAT kinda shit doesn't stay in-house. We would know.
 

crystalline

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Right, maybe they can issue a statement saying

"Chandler Jones was smoking Spice early Sunday morning. Obviously it was some really good stuff, because it induced him to take all his clothes off and walk into Walgreen's. Then, he walked over to the police station. Both are very close to his house. The cops were a little worried but they know that synthetic marijuana can cause people to freak out, so not that worried. To be safe, the cops took him to the hospital. After a few hours he felt better and was released. After a good night's sleep, he showed up at practice on time on Monday. We hope you don't notice that almost every sentence in this release is a HIPAA violation."
 

54thMA

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Whatever really happened, there's one thing I'm certain of. Namely, that the Patriots usual "clam up, keep it all in house" approach is already not serving them in this situation. It is probably too late already, but they need to get out in front of this story because when we all wake up tomorrow morning this is going to be a media shitstorm of major proportions.

Yeah, I know they issued a statement earlier, but "bland and generic" isn't gonna cut it.
So, another media shitstorm of major proportions?

Hopefully, that will mean another Lombardi, but also another league investigation, another mega thread afterward, then another "Things Patriots fans said" thread from Shemp Berry.
 

Toe Nash

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Whatever really happened, there's one thing I'm certain of. Namely, that the Patriots usual "clam up, keep it all in house" approach is already not serving them in this situation. It is probably too late already, but they need to get out in front of this story because when we all wake up tomorrow morning this is going to be a media shitstorm of major proportions.

Yeah, I know they issued a statement earlier, but "bland and generic" isn't gonna cut it.
Nothing they say will make any difference.
 

crystalline

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Triplicate.

(The JS features on the new board are nice but they cause problems when things are slow or load is high)
 

Shelterdog

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I would keep all of this shit in house. They owe nobody any explanations and serving up info would only feed the frenzy. This is not like DFG. Keep a lid on, win Sunday, and then say on to denver.

And I am sorry -- anyone who thinks this is a remarkable series of coincidences is incredibly fucking naive.
Weird coincidences happen all the time. I wouldn't be surprised if the gronk absence was linked to this (you gave another player shitty synthetic weed? you're kicked out of practice).

I think it's a lot more likely that BB bumped into a cabinet when he was going to work at 2:15 in the morning than that a player hit him. Also he would have force choked the player to death and that hasn't been reported yet.
 

dcmissle

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If Belichick was punched in the face by a player, it would be the biggest story in sports.
It would not have to be a punch in the face. Heated argument, somebody throw a something, it richochets and hits coach in the eye. Shit happens. Nobody means it. People part ways temporarily to cool off.

Still could be consistent with player getting fucked up on rec drugs and Gronk being held to account.
 

Jed Zeppelin

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I remember how naive we all were to believe McNally going to the bathroom was just a coincidental piss break.
 

cornwalls@6

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I would keep all of this shit in house. They owe nobody any explanations and serving up info would only feed the frenzy. This is not like DFG. Keep a lid on, win Sunday, and then say on to denver.

And I am sorry -- anyone who thinks this is a remarkable series of coincidences is incredibly fucking naive.
Care to offer a theory as to how Belichick's eye is related to Jones' medical issue is related to Gronk not practicing today?
 

Ed Hillel

Wants to be startin somethin
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Dec 12, 2007
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Whatever really happened, there's one thing I'm certain of. Namely, that the Patriots usual "clam up, keep it all in house" approach is already not serving them in this situation. It is probably too late already, but they need to get out in front of this story because when we all wake up tomorrow morning this is going to be a media shitstorm of major proportions.

Yeah, I know they issued a statement earlier, but "bland and generic" isn't gonna cut it.
Yeah, they totally should have released a team statement on Monday saying Chandler Jones showed up naked at Walgreen's at 7AM on Sunday morning because he was all jammed up and he ended up in Norwood hospital on Sunday after partying at Gronk's house while Gronk was off partying with some babes in Florida so don't worry because Gronk wasn't involved, at least not directly.

I can't imagine why they wouldn't want to have wanted to just say that up front.

Basically, unless Jones is already on some sort of drug program for failing a test, this seems like a pretty big nothingburger for the immediate future. Jones is going to play, Gronk probably is fine and had nothing to do with this (unless he was taking some stuff Gronk shouldn't have had, and even then meh), and Bill's eye will heal. I was not big on re-signing Jones after his rookie deal and I'm guessing this probably greatly decreases the likelihood of such a scenario, so that's good from my perspective I guess.

From a media perspective, this will be excellent talk radio fodder, but inside the locker room I doubt it will have much impact. This will be a blip on Deflategate's asscheeks and they survived that just fine. Speaking of asscheeks, Michael Irvin was doing blow off hooker's and that team did just fine. I doubt many people care outside of some disappointment, but if the coaching staff can get over it that quickly, I'm guessing his teammates will be glad to have him on the field. There may be more concern than anything. I hope the guy's ok, we know his brother has serious issues.

For the long-term, I am a bit wary about a potential coverup involving police. I'm not well-versed in HIPAA, but it seems like a big stretch that it would cover something like this, particularly the facts preceding his "jamming up" on police grounds. He was purportedly committing a crime, and somehow all the background information on what happened disappeared in the name of HIPAA. Hopefully the chain ends with some overprotective folk in the Foxboro PD or it goes away and nobody investigates. That's the part of the story I don't like, but if anything were to happen on that front, it likely would happen in the offseason.
 
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Leather

given himself a skunk spot
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Jul 18, 2005
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This is not analogous to Delflatefest at all. Hell, it's not even analogous to a player getting pulled over for speeding. It's nothing but gossip that the league can't even really act on because neither law enforcement or the hospital will say shit.
 

Ferm Sheller

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Can we compile a list of users who think BB's black eye is somehow related to whatever event Jones experienced this weekend? It's a perfect litmus test for intelligence (or lack thereof).
 

PayrodsFirstClutchHit

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Care to offer a theory as to how Belichick's eye is related to Jones' medical issue is related to Gronk not practicing today?
This theory is from Reddit. Seems the most plausible...

Jones ODed on coke at Gronk's house, Gronk not knowing what to do called Bill. Bill shows up with the Pulp Fiction kit and jams a needle right into his chest at which point Jones wakes up and not knowing what is happening, punches Bill right in the eye. Not wanting the media to find out, it has actually been Chandler's brother posing as him at practice the last 2 days. Gronk thinking that Belichick was actually murdering Jones instead of saving him ran out of the house screaming "HELL NO, I AINT GOIN TO PRISON LIKE AARON!!!", Tom and Edelman then drove around the neighborhood in Tom's car searching for him. After finding him hiding in a Burger King bathroom, they convinced him to come to practice on monday, but after more consideration Gronk decided that Bill was in fact trying to kill Jones and now Gronk has put himself in witness protection, by which I mean he is hiding in Johnny Manziel's closet drinking vodka tonics and playing Angry Birds on his phone.
 

dcmissle

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I don't give a shit as long as it does not happen again. Unless it was a PED -- and it was not -- there is not a goddamn thing Goodell can do for the next 3 games.

And if Jones got fucked up with synthetic weed, you won't have him to worry about next year. He will be someone else's problem.
 

DJnVa

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Dec 16, 2010
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Yeah, I know they issued a statement earlier, but "bland and generic" isn't gonna cut it.
Now playing the role of ESPN...

You're doing what we lambasted ESPN and 98% of the media for.

If all the parties (Chandler, the police, and the Patriots) are okay with where things are, you are not owed anything else. And there's no way this is more of a distraction than the lead up to the Super Bowl last year.
 

amarshal2

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Oct 25, 2005
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Assuming this was much ado about nothing at best and he geeked out on some street drugs at worst, the best thing to do about this is nothing. It will go away on its own.
 

dcmissle

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If this was a criminal drug matter, don't you think he'd have been arrested after receiving medical care?
Not necessarily. How do you think Urban Meyer got his boys through Florida. Personal use > discretion of the authorities.
 

Ferm Sheller

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Is a maintenance day off from a full pads practice, for a guy of Gronk's importance/playing style/injury history, really that hard from some here to accept?
I would believe this if it weren't for yhe fact that BB is walking around with a fresh black eye. Your explanation in no way explains the black eye, which means it is erroneous on its face
 

DeJesus Built My Hotrod

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Can we compile a list of users who think BB's black eye is somehow related to whatever event Jones experienced this weekend? It's a perfect litmus test for intelligence (or lack thereof).
Well you guys can be homers about this whole mess but I know where most objective NFL fans including me will come down.

Given that Belichick's badly battered face just happens to coincide with one of his top defensive players going on a drug addled rampage around Foxboro, its more probable than not that the two are related.
 

RedOctober3829

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Well you guys can be homers about this whole mess but I know where most objective NFL fans including me will come down.

Given that Belichick's badly battered face just happens to coincide with one of his top defensive players going on a drug addled rampage around Foxboro, its more probable than not that the two are related.
Do you and Chandler share the same weed dealer?
 

DeJesus Built My Hotrod

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I will also add that its more probable than not that Gronk had a hand in this mess too. I am guessing both he and Jones will be cut during the offseason. Brady and BB may decide that they have had enough too. The circus has to end sometime...
 

soxhop411

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Dec 4, 2009
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I will also add that its more probable than not that Gronk had a hand in this mess too. I am guessing both he and Jones will be cut during the offseason. Brady and BB may decide that they have had enough too. The circus has to end sometime...
Gronk won't be cut. Come on.
 

Leather

given himself a skunk spot
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Jul 18, 2005
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You think that they will cut Rob Gronkowski?

And, to be clear, neither of those possibilities is "more probable than not." Possible? Yes. Plausible? Sure. That's about it.
 

genoasalami

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I will also add that its more probable than not that Gronk had a hand in this mess too. I am guessing both he and Jones will be cut during the offseason. Brady and BB may decide that they have had enough too. The circus has to end sometime...
If BB's black eye, C Jones showing up at FPD and Gronk missing practice are all intertwined, then the ensuing shit storm will be a CAT 5.
 

soxhop411

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Dec 4, 2009
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You think that they will cut Rob Gronkowski?

And, to be clear, neither of those possibilities is "more probable than not." Possible? Yes. Plausible? Sure. That's about it.

If the pats were to cut Gronk. He would be picked up in a cocaine heartbeat
 

koufax32

He'll cry if he wants to...
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Dec 8, 2006
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A couple of years ago I had a horrible tooth problem. Doc gave me Vicodin for it. I made certain to eat plenty of calories with each dose and was fine until my last dose. I was so full and just thought I already had enough food in my stomach I was okay. Nope. I woke up having to puke. When I did and now had literally nothing in my stomach the next several hours were a living hell of cramping, hallucinations, losing feeling in my extremities, and an inability to stand on my own. I crawled back and forth to bed and fought sleep as I thought I'd die if I did. The hospital said I'd be okay but just have to ride it out. All of that from an honest mistake.

If there were something nefarious here there were two chances for CJ to get into legal trouble, one at the station, the other at the hospital. That did not happen. Some variant of my experience is the easiest explanation barring some yet undisclosed details. Chill out people.

And Vicodin is the devil.
 

Three10toLeft

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Oct 2, 2008
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I understand a healthy amount of skepticism.

But Jesus, if this were another franchise, wouldn't we all be saying "Where there is smoke, there is fire?" This just seems like a really odd series of events/coincidences. It's just plain weird, regardless of if these events were related or not. And really makes me doubt this teams ability to overcome their last couple weeks of piss poor play combined with this series of events, related or not.