As one of the few posters on this board who has been excited for the 2023 Red Sox basically since the end of the 2022 World Series, this has been an incredibly long and frustrating offseason. Watching 75% of you turd buckets melt down 22.5 hours a day from November until February was like having my toe nails ripped out, one at a time, over and over. I am glad I don't live in Boston anymore, because if this offseason is the way the reasonable and thoughtful people that we are supposed to be on this board act when discussing baseball, then I can't imagine trying to chat with Sully from Southy about the Sox.

So, it's time. The season starts next week and I have spend 5 months trying not to rip my hair out reading the oozing panic all over SoSH, and 90% of you are probably tired of my optimism. Sadly, I live off of my military retirement, and just had to take out $15K in home repair loans, so I can't make any crazy, life changing wagers, but:

LogansDad challengers:

1. Scott Cooper's Grand Slam

2. Average Game James

3. jwbasham84

4. Phil Plantier

Heating up in the bullpen challengers:

1. Coachster

2. streeter88

3. Pozo the Clown

4. NixkEsasky

pk1627 challengers:

1. Traut

2. FlexFlexerson

3. DennyDoyle'sBoil

4. pokey_reese

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SIDE BETS

Coachster challenger(James Paxton 40+ innings, challengers take the over, $50 wager)

1. Sin Duda

streeter88 challenger (Paxton 40+ IP, challenger takes the over, $50 wager)

1. Bob Montgomery's Helmet Hat

streeter88 challenger (Sale 5+ QS, REAL QS, not those fake ones, whatever they are, challenger takes the over, $50 wager)

1. Bob Montgomery's Helmet Hat

DDB challenge (DDB pays $25 per month that Kiké hits a home run, and $50 extra if he hits >10.5, challenger accepts $100 wager to the Jimmy Fund if the Red Sox throw a no-hitter... a real no-hitter, not that fake shit)

1. rockchalkredsox

ookami7m challenger (Yoshida greater than 25 HR and 40 doubles, challenger takes the under, $100 wager)

1. StupendousMan

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DONATIONS

1. Average Game James: $1 for every IP by James Paxton

So, it's time. The season starts next week and I have spend 5 months trying not to rip my hair out reading the oozing panic all over SoSH, and 90% of you are probably tired of my optimism. Sadly, I live off of my military retirement, and just had to take out $15K in home repair loans, so I can't make any crazy, life changing wagers, but:

**I HEREBY DECLARE AND LET IT BE KNOWN THUSLY:**

I WILL TAKE ON THE FIRST FOUR (4 for those of you who can't read number words) SoSH CHALLENGERS UNDER THE FOLLOWING TERMS AND CONDITIONS

1) If the Red Sox finish the 2023 season below 81 wins, I will pay $50 per challenger to the Jimmy Fund.

2) If the Red Sox finish the season with 81 or more wins, but miss the playoffs, I will pay $25 per challenger to the Jimmy Fund, and each challenger will pay $25 to the Jimmy Fund (or the charity of their choice)

3) If the Red Sox make the playoffs, each challenger will pay $50 to the Jimmy Fund (or the charity of their choice).

4) If the Red Sox win the World Series, all four challengers and myself will pay $50 to the Jimmy Fund (or the charity of their choice), and everybody fucking wins.

You have until Sunday, 2 April, at midnight to accept this challenge.

Bring on the regular season, for fuck's sake.I WILL TAKE ON THE FIRST FOUR (4 for those of you who can't read number words) SoSH CHALLENGERS UNDER THE FOLLOWING TERMS AND CONDITIONS

1) If the Red Sox finish the 2023 season below 81 wins, I will pay $50 per challenger to the Jimmy Fund.

2) If the Red Sox finish the season with 81 or more wins, but miss the playoffs, I will pay $25 per challenger to the Jimmy Fund, and each challenger will pay $25 to the Jimmy Fund (or the charity of their choice)

3) If the Red Sox make the playoffs, each challenger will pay $50 to the Jimmy Fund (or the charity of their choice).

4) If the Red Sox win the World Series, all four challengers and myself will pay $50 to the Jimmy Fund (or the charity of their choice), and everybody fucking wins.

You have until Sunday, 2 April, at midnight to accept this challenge.

Bring on the regular season, for fuck's sake.

LogansDad challengers:

1. Scott Cooper's Grand Slam

2. Average Game James

3. jwbasham84

4. Phil Plantier

Heating up in the bullpen challengers:

1. Coachster

2. streeter88

3. Pozo the Clown

4. NixkEsasky

pk1627 challengers:

1. Traut

2. FlexFlexerson

3. DennyDoyle'sBoil

4. pokey_reese

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

SIDE BETS

Coachster challenger(James Paxton 40+ innings, challengers take the over, $50 wager)

1. Sin Duda

streeter88 challenger (Paxton 40+ IP, challenger takes the over, $50 wager)

1. Bob Montgomery's Helmet Hat

streeter88 challenger (Sale 5+ QS, REAL QS, not those fake ones, whatever they are, challenger takes the over, $50 wager)

1. Bob Montgomery's Helmet Hat

DDB challenge (DDB pays $25 per month that Kiké hits a home run, and $50 extra if he hits >10.5, challenger accepts $100 wager to the Jimmy Fund if the Red Sox throw a no-hitter... a real no-hitter, not that fake shit)

1. rockchalkredsox

ookami7m challenger (Yoshida greater than 25 HR and 40 doubles, challenger takes the under, $100 wager)

1. StupendousMan

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DONATIONS

1. Average Game James: $1 for every IP by James Paxton

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