Did I Screw Up My Kids Chances?

Just a bit outside

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My son is a freshman and is having a successful season playing on the JV baseball team.  A couple of weeks ago he was called up to varsity.  He was very excited. He has only played in one out of five games on varsity, tempering his feelings, and after talking with him I encouraged him to talk with the coach about moving back to JV so he could play.  He talked with the varsity coach last night and the coach seemed upset about having the discussion.  My son has now been given the choice to stay on varsity and not play very much, or move down to JV and play but have the varsity coach upset with him.
 
Any suggestions on what he should do moving forward.  Do you think this will impact his chances to play varsity next year?  Thanks.
 
 
 

EddieYost

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  • play varsity
  • don't bug the coach again
  • play some summer ball if possible
 

Heinie Wagner

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Having a freshman sit the bench on varsity vs playing on JV seems like a very shortsighted move, is there any reasonable justification for this? It's almost certainly going to hurt his development as a player.
 
Getting upset when a player asks a perfectly legit question seems bad too. Makes Yost's suggestion seem prudent.
 
I suggest you move or consider private school.
 

Just a bit outside

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Heinie Wagner said:
Having a freshman sit the bench on varsity vs playing on JV seems like a very shortsighted move, is there any reasonable justification for this? It's almost certainly going to hurt his development as a player.
 
Getting upset when a player asks a perfectly legit question seems bad too. Makes Yost's suggestion seem prudent.
 
I suggest you move or consider private school.
This is my issue with the move.  He called my son up and then sat him on the bench without talking to him at all.  I want him to play and continue to develop.  My son is now unsure.  I think he would rather play JV but doesn't want to upset the coach.
 

Heinie Wagner

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The worst part is that the coach didn't communicate with the player and then got upset when the player tried to communicate. That's not just bad coaching, that's bad leadership.
 

Fred not Lynn

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EddieYost said:
 
  • play varsity
  • don't bug the coach again
  • play some summer ball if possible
 
 
Exactly. Coaches can be a pain in the ass. Some of them can be total morons - but they're the gatekeepers to the game, and you have to respect them.
 
Make hay with summer ball, and just let him improve his game to the point where the Varsity coach can't NOT play him.
 

Heinie Wagner

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Fred not Lynn said:
 
Exactly. Coaches can be a pain in the ass. Some of them can be total morons - but they're the gatekeepers to the game, and you have to respect them.
 
Very well put. High School sports coaches have a lot of power and at least around here they're not exactly selected from a large pool of applicants.
 
If you can't move or send your kid to private school :)    make the best of what you've got.  
 

PC Drunken Friar

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Heinie Wagner said:
 
Very well put. High School sports coaches have a lot of power and at least around here they're not exactly selected from a large pool of applicants.
 
If you can't move or send your kid to private school :)    make the best of what you've got.  
He is a freshman high school student... Why would moving to a private school because of this be the first or second option?
 

Just a bit outside

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Thanks all. 
 
The coach talked with my son yesterday and he is going to swing between the two levels.  I don't know why the coach was short with him during the initial discussion but it sounds like they had a good conversation after a day to think about it. 
 
If the games conflict the coach will let him know which team he wants him on that day.  He was able to get some at bats yesterday in the JV game because the varsity game was moved to today.  He will dress for varsity today.  I think this is the best outcome at the moment.
 

twothousandone

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Just a bit outside said:
Thanks all. 
 
The coach talked with my son yesterday and he is going to swing between the two levels.  I don't know why the coach was short with him during the initial discussion but it sounds like they had a good conversation after a day to think about it. 
 
If the games conflict the coach will let him know which team he wants him on that day.  He was able to get some at bats yesterday in the JV game because the varsity game was moved to today.  He will dress for varsity today.  I think this is the best outcome at the moment.
Has your son find time to say "Dad/Mom, you were right. I get it now. Even if the coaches initial response had remained the only response, it's an important lesson to speak up for myself. Baseball, high school, even high school baseball don't define me. Playing time is a pimple on a elephant in my life. Becoming the man I am to become, learning to deal with adversity, and being happy even in the midst of adversity, so long as I am true to myself, are the things that really matter. And by not being afraid to speak up, I actually unlocked some key information from the coach. So, again, Dad/Mom, thanks."?
 
If he hasn't, I'll bet it's coming any day now.
 

Fred not Lynn

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At my son's school, they always played the Varsity game first, then the JV after - so the fringe V guys would be the JV starters, unless they got used a lot in the V game for some reason. Pretty good system, I thought.
 

Just a bit outside

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Fred not Lynn said:
At my son's school, they always played the Varsity game first, then the JV after - so the fringe V guys would be the JV starters, unless they got used a lot in the V game for some reason. Pretty good system, I thought.
That would be nice.  The JV and Varsity play opposites at my son's school.  One away, the other at home. 
 

LoweTek

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I was trying to be funny.
Not so far fetched in my experience. I am aware of numerous examples local to my area in and around Orlando. Lots of fiefdoms, questionable travel ball relationships, favors, relative's addresses used, and actual money changing hands. Sometimes if the kid is legit, has a shot and the coach is the problem, there's not much choice other than a private school program, assuming you want an ethical alternative.
 

DrewDawg

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Just a bit outside said:
That would be nice.  The JV and Varsity play opposites at my son's school.  One away, the other at home. 
 
 
Ours generally does JV first then varsity upon completion, except football when JV is played a day before.
 
I think I might prefer the varsity going first. When that game ends, an engaged varsity coach can watch some of the JV game. As it is now, the teams don't travel together, so varsity arrives, may watch 15 minutes of the JV game, then they start getting ready.
 

 
 

Heinie Wagner

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LoweTek said:
Not so far fetched in my experience. I am aware of numerous examples local to my area in and around Orlando. Lots of fiefdoms, questionable travel ball relationships, favors, relative's addresses used, and actual money changing hands. Sometimes if the kid is legit, has a shot and the coach is the problem, there's not much choice other than a private school program, assuming you want an ethical alternative.
 
We have friends in New Jersey who had a choice between two high school for their son (not sure how it works there, but that's how they explained it), one was much better for basketball but much worse academically, they admittedly chose the school using basketball as the top priority. (Mom was a D-1 scholarship player, Dad is about 6'5")
 
If your kid has a shot at getting money for college it might make sense, no matter how wrong it seems at first glance.