Colin Kaepernick being investigated for sexual assault

RSN Diaspora

molests goats for comedy
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Ed Hillel said:
 
You don't think many people (I'd say women, but Rev will yell at me maybe) grow up thinking about how their wedding day is going to be bright and shiny, and just all around perfect? Do I need to give you a lesson about the 3 types of irony? Because expecting your wedding day to be sunny and then having it rain is a prime example of situational irony.
 
If I expect to fuck Emily Ratajkowski when I get home tonight (I won't, alas), that just makes me an idiot rather than a victim of situational irony. There's no reason to expect a sunny day over any other kind of day (unless you're in the desert). Hope ≠ reasonable expectation.
 

Reverend

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Ed Hillel said:
 
You don't think many people (I'd say women, but Rev will yell at me maybe) grow up thinking about how their wedding day is going to be bright and shiny, and just all around perfect? Do I need to give you a lesson about the 3 types of irony? Because expecting your wedding day to be sunny and then having it rain is a prime example of situational irony.
 
No, it isn't. It would only be irony if the reason you decided to get married was because you believed that it was never going to rain again or something like that.
 
I would love to hear this lesson about "the 3 types of irony" though.
 

Reverend

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RSN Diaspora said:
 
If I expect to fuck Emily Ratajkowski when I get home tonight (I won't, alas), that just makes me an idiot rather than a victim of situational irony. There's no reason to expect a sunny day over any other kind of day (unless you're in the desert). Hope ≠ reasonable expectation.
 
Even the reasonable expectation stuff is a recent addition to the "textbook" definitions of irony. Basically, they altered the definitions in the books because people had trouble grasping the concept and were using it wrong... like literally, they redefined the statement of knowledge to conform to the ignorance.
 

Ed Hillel

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RSN Diaspora said:
 
If I expect to fuck Emily Ratajkowski when I get home tonight (I won't, alas), that just makes me an idiot rather than a victim of situational irony. There's no reason to expect a sunny day over any other kind of day (unless you're in the desert). Hope ≠ reasonable expectation.
 
I've never seen anything that suggests an expectation must be objectively reasonable where situational irony is concerned. There is also a significant chance of it being sunny on a wedding day, unlike the goose egg in your example. Do we have an irony expert in da hizzie?
 

soxfan121

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Ed Hillel said:
 
I've never seen anything that suggests an expectation must be objectively more likely to happen than not where situational irony is concerned. Do we have an irony expert in da hizzie?
 
There's no way you're this clever, so way to go Poindexter.
 
Dogman2 said:
I bet he only names two.
 
Brilliant. Fucking brilliant.
 

Ed Hillel

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Reverend said:
 
No, it isn't. It would only be irony if the reason you decided to get married was because you believed that it was never going to rain again or something like that.
 
I would love to hear this lesson about "the 3 types of irony" though.
 
Well, the three major ones I knew of were situational, dramatic, and verbal. I don't know how that has evolved in the recent textbooks or, really, who even gets to make the decisions. Who is the arbiter of what constitutes modern irony?
 
 
It would only be irony if the reason you decided to get married was because you believed that it was never going to rain again or something like that.
 
Well, this goes to the reasonableness thing, right? People build their weddings up over their lifetime to be literally and figuratively sunny and happy. In looking this up, I've seen some sources that would suggest it would constitute and others that wouldn't. Who is doing the expecting? The individual actor, or is it being viewed from a societal view? Can be it ironic to one person and not others?  I need the official irony source. We need to know. Hurry. Do nothing else before you do this.
 

Reverend

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Ed Hillel said:
 
Well, the three major ones I knew of were situational, dramatic, and verbal. I don't know how that has evolved in the recent textbooks or, really, who even gets to make the decisions. Who is the arbiter of what constitutes modern irony?
 
 
 
Well, this goes to the reasonableness thing, right? People build their weddings up over their lifetime to be literally and figuratively sunny and happy. In looking this up, I've seen some sources that would suggest it would constitute and others that wouldn't. Who is doing the expecting? The individual actor, or is it being viewed from a societal view? Can be it ironic to one person and not others?  I need the official irony source. We need to know. Hurry. Do nothing else before you do this.
 
Demanding the formal sourcing for a rigid typology of something as subtle and nuanced as "irony" is the functional equivalent of hopping up on your desk and screaming to all who can hear, "I AM AN ATTORNEY!!"
 

RSN Diaspora

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Reverend said:
 
Even the reasonable expectation stuff is a recent addition to the "textbook" definitions of irony. Basically, they altered the definitions in the books because people had trouble grasping the concept and were using it wrong... like literally, they redefined the statement of knowledge to conform to the ignorance.
 
I recognize that, which is why I think saying you "expect" something has to really mean an expectation grounded in reality. Otherwise "expect" can be synonymous with "hope."
 
People might build up their wedding experiences to unrealistic expectation. So too do most teenagers losing their virginity--you expect it to be all like the softcore pornos you've watched on cable, when in fact it's far less graceful. Fuckin' ironic, amirite?
 
I should have known better than to get into this.
 

Ed Hillel

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Reverend said:
 
Demanding the formal sourcing for a rigid typology of something as subtle and nuanced as "irony" is the functional equivalent of hopping up on your desk and screaming to all who can hear, "I AM AN ATTORNEY!!"
 
Well, I guess that's one way of looking at it...
 


I should have known better than to get into this.
 
My fault, I should have known. 
 

deconstruction

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DrewDawg said:
Sigh. What's more obnoxious? Correcting a mistake, or being wrong and doubling down on it?
 
If you see a sign that says: "Parking Prohibited On Sunday" then you can infer that parking is permitted by rule the other 6 days. The exception (no parking on Sunday) proves the rule (it's allowed on the other days).
 
You know what's obnoxious? Improper use of colons.
 
Butt sex is proper use.
 

deconstruction

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How many "successful mobile QBs in the league without felony rap sheets" do we need to prove its not a rule? Are we working with 95% confidence intervals here? Should we run a multiple linear regression? MANCOVA? HLM? SEM? HELP?
 

Reverend

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deconstruction said:
How many "successful mobile QBs in the league without felony rap sheets" do we need to prove its not a rule? Are we working with 95% confidence intervals here? Should we run a multiple linear regression? MANCOVA? HLM? SEM? HELP?
 
Uh-oh...
 

NortheasternPJ

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deconstruction said:
How many "successful mobile QBs in the league without felony rap sheets" do we need to prove its not a rule? Are we working with 95% confidence intervals here? Should we run a multiple linear regression? MANCOVA? HLM? SEM? HELP?
 
 

SMU_Sox

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You guys realize that my initial quip was merely a joke right? Sarcasm. Verbal.... irony ;)
 

Judge Mental13

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I always thought it would be funny to dig up old threads from the boneyard and have a contest where you start from the last page and read backwards and whoever can identify the topic of the OG thread first wins a prize.
 
This thread would be a fucking hum-dinger in my imaginary game. A hum-fucking-dinger. 
 

m0ckduck

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Oh, and Aldon Smith was detained at LAX for telling security people that he was in possession of a bomb. Other than that, pretty great offseason for the Niners. 
 
I'm actually surprised that the maximum legal punishment for Smith is a year of jail time. Given the current political climate, I would have expected it to be longer. (Not saying it should be; just saying it runs counter to my expectations.) 
 

gaelgirl

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I had a fairly long post eaten up by the board issues, but, basically: So far, with the facts we have, this story is really weird. It's not even certain anybody has made a rape allegation, just that some shady stuff went down. I'm not ready to take out my "he's a rapist!" pitchfork just yet. 
 
So far, the story could range anywhere from Kaep and his buddies drugged and viciously gang raped an unconscious woman and dumped her outside like trash, to Kaep and the chick hooked up at one point in life, but not that night.
 
The latest is that Ricardo Lockette is the one who called the police, indicating that a naked chick was refusing to leave his apartment: http://blogs.sacbee.com/49ers/archives/2014/04/police-report-lockette-called-police-to-have-woman-removed-from-suite.html 
 
This is confusing. Right now, Aldon Smith takes the lead for most afoul of the law 49er of the weekend.
 

gaelgirl

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m0ckduck said:
Oh, and Aldon Smith was detained at LAX for telling security people that he was in possession of a bomb. Other than that, pretty great offseason for the Niners. 
 
I'm actually surprised that the maximum legal punishment for Smith is a year of jail time. Given the current political climate, I would have expected it to be longer. (Not saying it should be; just saying it runs counter to my expectations.) 
Kaep, Smith and Culliver are keeping up the illegal activities end of the Niners roster, while Jed York, Trent Baalke and Jim Harbaugh are highlighting the "petty political infighting" section of the draw. However the darkhorse "do the Niners draft a QB in the first round?" longshot is galloping down the stretch and may just win the whole offseason! 
 

MalzoneExpress

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SMU_Sox said:
You guys realize that my initial quip was merely a joke right? Sarcasm. Verbal.... irony ;)
Yeah, but my tripling down on the incorrect use of "exception that proved the rule" is what got thing going in the wrong direction. Mea cupla.