Bruins sign Mitchell Miller to an ELC - now "parting ways"

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SoSH's Doug Neidermeyer
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Also, I encourage every one to read this interview with him.

https://azcoyotesinsider.substack.com/p/mitchell-miller-addresses-his-past

“This isn’t about saving my career. Obviously, I want to play hockey. It’s my dream, but I want to let everyone know that I made a mistake and how sincere and sorry I am that I affected their family and their lives. I got dropped by Arizona and North Dakota, but it’s not about saving my career. It’s letting people know what I did was wrong. Again, I take all ownership of what I did and I’m not going to defend myself on all of that stuff. I’ve just got to take it, but I have matured since eighth grade.”
 

Steve Dillard

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Oct 7, 2003
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If the culture Chara helped establish is going to be overwhelmed by one player, then maybe the culture wasn’t all it appeared to be. I don’t believe that is the case at all. A few things will happen here. Miller will tow the line both on and off the ice guided by vets in PVD such as Wags or he’ll prove himself a shithead. Adam McQuaid, who is as decent a person in hockey as anyone, will surely be a big part of Miller’s guidance. I wouldn’t doubt that Chara himself meets with the kid and possibly serves as a mentor. Maybe the strength of the organizational culture makes this the right place for Miller to develop into someone who can be respectful member of society.
This is most all about role models. At 14 he had horrible ones. Now, he has both a financial incentive and role models who hopefully lead to his remorse. That his remorse to this date doesn’t seem sincere may be accurate. But from a societal point, do we want him driving trucks and being a miserable human being, or having a decent financial incentive, and different voices showing him he can feel good enough about himself without having to demean others. I’m all for a good moral rebuke, but trying to fix someone seems like it’s a decent thing for a 15-17 year old whose mistakes were not fatal
 

JCizzle

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There’s a bit of misinformation floating around out there.

He absolutely did apologize, directly, to the victim. Yes, it was court ordered. But to say he didn’t is wrong.

Here is the letter.

https://images.app.goo.gl/2xwERMk1E1u6XyZm7

You can debate the sincerity of it, but 14 year old kids aren’t exactly eloquent.
So the two times he’s reached out was at the direction of third parties - the court and the Bruins. To each their own, it certainly doesn’t scream sincere to me.
 

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SoSH's Doug Neidermeyer
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So the two times he’s reached out was at the direction of third parties - the court and the Bruins. To each their own, it certainly doesn’t scream sincere to me.
read the interview I linked.

The court orders forbid him from reaching out and making contact. He was trying to follow the court order.

Y’all are so quick to make judgements without reading the kids own words.
 

RIFan

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It's not a matter of one person overwhelming that culture, but the act of signing this player is itself an erosion of it IMO.
I don’t see this necessarily as an erosion. It is an opportunity to demonstrate the strength of the culture. I’m also of the opinion that many of the current members of the Boston and Providence locker rooms were far from choir boys during their early teenage (and later) years. Given the state of hockey culture throughout juniors it’s likely more than a few behaved in ways that if publicized would cause some serious blowback.
 

j44thor

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read the interview I linked.

The court orders forbid him from reaching out and making contact. He was trying to follow the court order.

Y’all are so quick to make judgements without reading the kids own words.
Did you read the article you linked? The hand written half assed court mandated apology was a fucking slap in the face to the victim and his family. Calling him his friend and suggesting this was horseplay that went to far is disgusting. He showed zero remorse outside of losing the chance at his dream and kept referring to an incident over a few weeks but this was something that went on for years.
I'm even more angry about the signing after reading that.
Hopefully he gets tuned up in the AHL and we never hear his name called.
 

The Mort Report

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I’m not certain about the locker room. Hockey is full of scatological and abusive hazing all up and down its ranks.
I don't know what the Providence locker room is like, but the B's probably have the best locker room in any sport. Chara himself killed off a lot, if not all, of the rookie hazing years ago. He would never refer to them as rookies, but first year players. Brad is a prankster, but those usually build chemistry. Obviously I don't know for sure, but if I had to put my faith in that current room I 100% would.

edit: this was meant for the locker room as it is, I'm not saying it in reference to Miller. I'm torn on how I feel about him signing here
 
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changer591

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What @Myt1 said about being bullied when he was young struck a nerve with me because I am also height challenged and am Chinese growing up in a very white town. I was bullied, and because I have a short temper and some wit, I was also a bullier of others when I was little. If I remember the people that bullied me when I was a kid, I can still hate them for what they did or made me feel 30 years ago, but I also don't care enough about them to wish them to suffer as adults and if they ended up being the nicest people ever, then good for them, and I'm happy for them. Would I want to be friends with them? Maybe? Who knows? We all grow and change. And would I think that the people I might have hurt when I was little with my words (because I sure as hell wasn't going to get physical since I would just get the shit kicked out of me due to my short stature) when I was little wish me ill will after all these years? I would hope not.
Now I was never subject (nor did) anything that came close to what this kid did, but I don't get why people can't just withhold judgement now that he's at the verge of becoming an adult? If he shows that he's still a piece of shit, then that sucks for the Bruins and it sucks that he wasn't able to right his wrongs...but I'm willing to give him a chance.
But I'm with @TSC , I don't think the victim's mother needs to forgive and forget, nor do I think the victim should feel like he should do the same. But I see no reason the rest of society needs to brand a teenager for the rest of his life with a scarlet letter forever.
I also chuckle about the people who feel like Chara's policy against hazing and bullying means that every single player on the Bruins in the recent past has never done anything like that in the past. Some of these gifted atheletes are handed everything when they are young and really don't know how to be "good" people...you can sometimes just hope they become better people when they grow up when they get taught right from wrong. Some don't, and some do. Rotten kids do become rotten adults. And some good kids become rotten adults too. It's not binary, and I hope that Miller becomes the opposite and is one of those rotten kids that changes their ways.
As for him being on the Bruins...I mean, I feel like there is risk involved, and I'd rather they not sign him, but it is what it is, and I wish and hope the best for everyone involved. And at least they didn't sign the hockey equivalent of Kyrie.
 

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SoSH's Doug Neidermeyer
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Did you read the article you linked? The hand written half assed court mandated apology was a fucking slap in the face to the victim and his family. Calling him his friend and suggesting this was horseplay that went to far is disgusting. He showed zero remorse outside of losing the chance at his dream and kept referring to an incident over a few weeks but this was something that went on for years.
I'm even more angry about the signing after reading that.
Hopefully he gets tuned up in the AHL and we never hear his name called.
No one expects the family to be able to look at this objectively or believe a word out of Mitchell’s mouth (or hands).

Doesn’t mean you need to follow that same path.
 

j44thor

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No one expects the family to be able to look at this objectively or believe a word out of Mitchell’s mouth (or hands).

Doesn’t mean you need to follow that same path.
You didn't answer the question, did you read the hand-written non-apology he wrote that calls the lone incident a funny prank that got bigger and ends with him hoping they can still be friends.
I'm curious how if you did read that you came to the conclusion you did. Clearly we are taking different paths on this one.
 

TSC

SoSH's Doug Neidermeyer
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You didn't answer the question, did you read the hand-written non-apology he wrote that calls the lone incident a funny prank that got bigger and ends with him hoping they can still be friends.
I'm curious how if you did read that you came to the conclusion you did. Clearly we are taking different paths on this one.
yes, I read it. As I was literally the one who found it and posted it here.

It reads like a 14 year kid who got caught doing something incredibly fucked up and was forced to write an apology - which, holy shit - is exactly what happened! I don’t expect the 14 year old kid who had just done something to immediately understand why he was wrong more so than “shit people are really pissed about this.”

I do read his most recent comments, and that interview with him, and see someone who, at least outwardly, has seen why what he did was wrong and is working towards not being who he was, when he was a piece of shit.
 

PC Drunken Friar

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yes, I read it. As I was literally the one who found it and posted it here.

It reads like a 14 year kid who got caught doing something incredibly fucked up and was forced to write an apology- which, holy shit - is exactly what happened! I don’t expect the 14 year old kid who had just done something to immediately understand why he was wrong more so than “shit people are really pissed about this.”

I do read his most recent comments, and that interview with him, and see someone who, at least outwardly, has seen why what he did was wrong and is working towards not being who he was, when he was a piece of shit.
Read his last statement again. He admits to "an incident". It wasn't. it was an assault.

“When I was in eighth grade, I made an extremely poor decision and acted very immaturely,” Miller said Friday in a statement released by the team. “I bullied one of my classmates. I deeply regret the incident and have apologized to the individual. Since the incident, I have come to better understand the far-reaching consequences of my actions that I failed to recognize and understand nearly seven years ago. I strive to be a better person and positively contribute to society."
He refuses to acknowledge that it was years long (not to mention that he refers multiple times how long ago it was) and that there were despicable racial aspects to it. Keep whistling...
 
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Two Youks

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I sent an email to the Bruins' fan relations address. Dunno if they'll read it since I'm not a season ticket holder. Going to keep the contents of it private as I talk a bit more about some of my own private stuff. I doubt it will change anything, but I think that having the front office know how a lot of us feel is important regardless.
 

Ferm Sheller

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I sent an email to the Bruins' fan relations address. Dunno if they'll read it since I'm not a season ticket holder. Going to keep the contents of it private as I talk a bit more about some of my own private stuff. I doubt it will change anything, but I think that having the front office know how a lot of us feel is important regardless.
I hope that you get a response and that it provides you comfort.
 

TSC

SoSH's Doug Neidermeyer
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Read his last statement again. He admits to "an incident". It wasn't. it was an assault.


He refuses to acknowledge that it was years long (not to mention that he refers multiple times how long ago it was) and that there were despicable racial aspects to it. Keep whistling...
What do you want him to call it?

You’re parsing his words looking for something to jump on.

He’s an immature kid. You’re treating his words like he’s a lawyer making a case. Maybe he just isn’t that articulate? Clearly he’s shown he’s not that smart, maybe that extends to how he’s trying to express contrition?

“I totally understand why people are mad at me,” Miller said in his first public comments since the 2020 NHL Draft in early October. “It obviously was wrong, what I did, and I said what I said to Isaiah. I’ll own up to everything I did. I’m not going to try to defend myself. I was definitely wrong. I don’t want it to define my life or my hockey career, but I take all ownership of what I did.

“This isn’t about saving my career. Obviously, I want to play hockey. It’s my dream, but I want to let everyone know that I made a mistake and how sincere and sorry I am that I affected their family and their lives. I got dropped by Arizona and North Dakota, but it’s not about saving my career. It’s letting people know what I did was wrong. Again, I take all ownership of what I did and I’m not going to defend myself on all of that stuff. I’ve just got to take it, but I have matured since eighth grade.”
 

PC Drunken Friar

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What do you want him to call it?

You’re parsing his words looking for something to jump on.

He’s an immature kid. You’re treating his words like he’s a lawyer making a case. Maybe he just isn’t that articulate? Clearly he’s shown he’s not that smart, maybe that extends to how he’s trying to express contrition?
I am not parsing his words. He did this for 7 years. And even after he was found out (thanks to cameras) he still kept after it. That is not "an incident".

You are being very ignorant if you think his statement today was not crafted by his people, agents and lawyers. He is minimizing his transgressions. He may be immature, but hasn't he lost that excuse and should be expected to "be better"? If he hasn't matured and learned from this, then he doesn't deserve a 2nd chance.
 

Bergs

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I wish the B's hadn't signed him. That said, I am reminded that there is a "how has SoSH made you a better person" thread that is active right now. I haven't posted in it, because I am not on SoSH for full emotional disclosure or introspection.

But I did give some thought earlier today to how I *would* respond if I did. And my unstructured and incompletely formulated answer was certainly centered around sympathy, attempting to be less judgmental, and generally trying to be less of an asshole.

I say that to say this: I am kinda on team @TSC at this point. If the kid is bullshitting, we'll find out soon enough.

Warning: personal story ahead!!!
When I was 16/17, I had my "bully"...big kid. tough, wrong end of the tracks. Sucker punches, etc. His buddy's GF was kinda into me. No clue why; I was fucking tiny. I literally grew 2 inches taller while I was in the Army.

While I was growing into a body that was also being trained how to hurt people, I was SO. FUCKING. PSYCHED. about how badly I was gonna fuck that guy up if I ever ran into him again.

I'm sitting at a bar in my hometown after I got off active duty, and there's a tap on my shoulder. "Hey Bergs...listen, I'm sorry about all that shit in High School. Can I buy you a beer?"...his hand extended...

I remember contemplating taking him down for a split second. And then I just decided to have a beer with this pretty nice guy who had a shittier childhood than I could imagine.

People change.

P.S.: Rest in Peace, John.
 
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TSC

SoSH's Doug Neidermeyer
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I am not parsing his words. He did this for 7 years. And even after he was found out (thanks to cameras) he still kept after it. That is not "an incident".

You are being very ignorant if you think his statement today was not crafted by his people, agents and lawyers. He is minimizing his transgressions. He may be immature, but hasn't he lost that excuse and should be expected to "be better"? If he hasn't matured and learned from this, then he doesn't deserve a 2nd chance.
You keep bringing up his “statement” from today, not me. I’m referencing the interview from two years ago where he wasn’t allowed anyone coaching him during it.

But keep going. You clearly have way more insight into the situation than anyone else, and know deep into his soul what this kids motivations really are.
 

PC Drunken Friar

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You keep bringing up his “statement” from today, not me. I’m referencing the interview from two years ago where he wasn’t allowed anyone coaching him during it.

But keep going. You clearly have way more insight into the situation than anyone else, and know deep into his soul what this kids motivations really are.
You literally said that you read his latest comments. WTF are you talking about?
 

PC Drunken Friar

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does it fucking matter? You get my overall point right?
It absolutely matters. He says that 7+ year incidents are "a" incident. As a full grown adult. And it wasn't an incident. The incidents were very close coming to (maybe even) a hate crime/s.

His court ordered apology in conjunction with today's statement is...just wow.
 
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24JoshuaPoint

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Ughh. A lot of people dropped the ball on this one because it went on for so long. How did it not end? I've had so many second chances so it's hard for me to say he doesn't deserve it because other people seemed to have failed him too. Life sentence from hockey? Apparently not in the eyes of the law or the Bruins. He is a habitual dumbass at this point due to so many failures. So if he fucks up one time, send his ass home i guess. It's a tough case IMO.
 

Marciano490

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I’ve thought about this a little now.

I like a redemption story as much as anyone. This guy isn’t gonna be St. Jude for fucked up teens. He’s another poster child for getting to get away with shit if you’re talented enough. And the next star player wondering how much shit they’ll get into for doing the wrong thing will be able to look at this dude, just as I’m sure he did at 14 looking at [insert long list of contemporary examples] and shrug.

It’s a collective good issue at heart. Some times bad things have to happen to questionable people for the good of the moral health of the whole.
 

Bob Montgomerys Helmet Hat

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I wish the B's hadn't signed him. That said, I am reminded that there is a "how has SoSH made you a better person" thread that is active right now. I haven't posted in it, because I am not on SoSH for full emotional disclosure or introspection.

But I did give some thought earlier today to how I *would* respond if I did. And my unstructured and incompletely formulated answer was certainly centered around sympathy, attempting to be less judgmental, and generally trying to be less of an asshole.

I say that to say this: I am kinda on team @TSC at this point. If the kid is bullshitting, we'll find out soon enough.

Warning: personal story ahead!!!
When I was 16/17, I had my "bully"...big kid. tough, wrong end of the tracks. Sucker punches, etc. His buddy's GF was kinda into me. No clue why; I was fucking tiny. I literally grew 2 inches taller while I was in the Army.

While I was growing into a body that was also being trained how to hurt people, I was SO. FUCKING. PSYCHED. about how badly I was gonna fuck that guy up if I ever ran into him again.

I'm sitting at a bar in my hometown after I got off active duty, and there's a tap on my shoulder. "Hey Bergs...listen, I'm sorry about all that shit in High School. Can I buy you a beer?"...his hand extended...

I remember contemplating taking him down for a split second. And then I just decided to have a beer with this pretty nice guy who had a shittier childhood than I could imagine.

People change.

P.S.: Rest in Peace, John.
So you killed him after all?
 

durandal1707

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It's very disappointing to see a franchise, that in recent years has said and done "all the right things," torpedo a hefty sum of that good will in a single act. It's hard to square this signing as being in line with the values of Zdeno Chara—a man who endured harassment and hazing but chose to create a culture that refused to perpetuate those harms. Or with the current leadership of Patrice Bergeron, who by all accounts is a man of exceptional compassion and empathy. Or even Brad Marchand, whose on-ice conduct at times has left a lot to be desired but has at least has stuck his neck out for the rights of gay people and by calling out petulant bigots like Tony DeAngelo. Where does Miller fit into this equation? There are things that are worth more than ticket sales and championships. This is one of those things.

Now, with regards to Miller himself, I'm torn. I don't want to get all V&N here, but I believe the carceral mindset is one of the most damaging ideologies of our culture today. We are wrong (and far too quick in our wrongness) to write someone off as "an unredeemably bad person," and by doing so, we frequently destroy any incentive or pathway for that person to reflect on their behavior and change. And I believe Miller, like any human being, can change for the better. That said, restorative justice is not equivalent to shirking accountability. What behaviors do we foster by offering a chance at fame and fortune to someone who, for years, actively and perpetually harmed one of the most vulnerable members of our society? I agree with the others here that I don't see how Miller has done enough to mend the harm he's caused. If he had done such things, then great—he could use his experience and his station to dissuade others from engaging in such harmful and frankly hateful behaviors. The problem is that it doesn't seem like he's reached that point yet.

I personally have experienced more than my fair share of bullying in my life as a neurodivergent and queer person. I also have perpetuated harm myself... I'm quite ashamed of the person I was in my mid-20s. These are not excuses—quite the opposite, really. Only through true accountability do we get to the root of these issues and stop the cycles of harm. Sweeney's decision today has unfortunately hindered such accountability, in my opinion.
 

grimshaw

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I'm very disappointed by the signing and also get the feeling that Don wasn't necessarily all in based on that awful press conference. Sweeney referencing that other teams were interested should have no bearing on their own interest.

I understand the farm needs re-stocking and all, but that's not how I want to root for this team.
 

yalesoxfan

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Pervasive, prolonged, and targeted violence on a defenseless victim is far along the spectrum of bullying. Most of us experienced some kind of bullying, and most of us probably treated others poorly to some degree. However, what Mitchell did was far beyond what most experienced, or did. He was held accountable. Was it enough? Maybe. The mother of the victim may never forgive Mitchell, and I don't blame her one bit for that. Her reaction is valid.

The Bruins did what so many sports organizations do: They hired an athlete who has talent and can help them win games. He had a really good season last year.

Mitchell has an opportunity he may, or may not, deserve. He has a scarlet letter that he also may, or may not, deserve. I expect that at least some fans, and maybe some players, in Providence will let him know their personal feelings towards him and his actions. He will have to deal with that. His responses and behaviors will tell us much more than his words ever will. If he truly has overcome whatever drove him to do those terrible things, then he will get through this. If his sociopathic tendencies from his youth have remained, or grown, we will see evidence of that, as well. We have seen examples of both scenarios before.
 

cornwalls@6

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I’m cautiously ok with the signing. What he did, repeatedly, was absolutely reprehensible. And he has to own it. But I also think his age, for all of the incidents, is a mitigating factor to some degree. And probably also speaks to him having had some pretty awful parenting. As others have noted, he’s not going to sniff Boston this season. A lower profile environment like Providence could be the right place to continue showing his commitment to changing and growing as a person, beyond his legal obligations. I would hope and expect the Bruins will require him to have a meaningful and sustained involvement with groups dedicated to fighting racism and bullying among young people. If he can do that in a genuine, sincere way, and if he performs well on the ice, it could be a very nice redemption story when he gets promoted to the big club. And if we are to ever truly get on the other side of these issues in American, redemption of those who’ve strayed is going to have to be a part of it. If he fails to do those things, then the Bruins should, and I suspect will, cut bait on him immediately. Either way, I don’t really agree that signing him torpedos all the good will the organization has built up over the years. But rather, I think it’s an acceptable risk to take with some of that capital.
 

burstnbloom

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I'm honestly shocked at the takes here. An "incident" when he was "14"? Are some of you guys serious? This kid tortured a disabled black kid for the better part of a decade by taunting him about his race and disability and both physically beat on the kid and physiologically abused him The victim still feels the pain of all of those things, by the way, according to his mother. Miller does the absolute bare minimum for atonement and every time he speaks and his statement isn't prepared (see quotes mark divver got yesterday) shows absolutely zero sense of remorse. What level of awful would you be willing to accept if this isn't beyond that? What if he had sexual abused someone instead when he was 14. We good with that? Brock Turner had a promising career ahead of him!

The redemption discourse on this page is disappointing. Milller has shown zero interest in redemption, he's done nothing to atone for his misdeeds, either directly with the victim or indirectly through charity work or personal growth (if he had, we'd know about it because every public statement by the kid is self serving and those efforts being known would benefit him), and seems only interested in "moving on." This is such a disappointing signing by the Bruins. I don't want this kid anywhere near the team I root for as consistently as i don't want Tony D'Angelo, Tyreek Hill, Raffi Torres and his black face or any other irredeemable piece of shit. I'm really surprised so many people on this page feel differently.
 

Eddie Jurak

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the mother admits that Miller tried to reach out via social media to apologize. It sounds almost identical to Salems Lot situation.

Key difference is that Salems Lot was willing to accept the apology. The Victims family does not appear to be willing to do so (not that anyone should blame them for that).

View: https://twitter.com/tps_guy/status/1588581348725649408?s=46&t=BHkjSP4yvZ8kcJP1ByrG1g
I think the victim's family wasn't and shouldn't be under any obligation to accept an apology, but also this kid (or any other kid) should not have his career be contingent on the family accepting an apology.

He needs to apologize sincerely (and I gather there is some disagreement about whether he did and whether it was sincere), though, whether it is accepted or not.

I'm OK with giving the kid a chance, but the Bruins need to truly have a zero tolerance policy. And I think it can be hard for an organization to take a step like this and then really have zero tolerance, because cutting him feels like admission of a mistake. I hope they know what they are doing, and there is fair reason to doubt them.
Seems to me that the alternatives are that (1) people get one strike in life or (2) people deserve unlimited chances to redeem themselves or (3) people deserve a limited number of opportunities to redeem themselves under conditions designed to ensure that they are not eternally punished for prior mistakes but also designed to show that they are, and continue to be on a go-forward basis, human beings who have learned from their mistakes.

I'd like to think that most people fall into (3), even if this thread (mostly) doesn't currently reflect that belief.
I fall in #3 myself, but since we are talking about a continued pattern of behavior here I think calling it "one strike" is minimizing it.

Someone above noted that it was not just him but rather him and another kid who terrorized the boy. That feels like it could potentially be somewhat mitigating. It brings peer pressure into it, and I think the only thing guaranteed to be worse than an asshole kid is 2 asshole kids or a group of them.

The Bruins have to really be zero tolerance here. If they are I am, and have honestly done their homework, I am cautiously OK with it, for now.
 

TSC

SoSH's Doug Neidermeyer
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Brock Turner was 19, an actual - legal adult when he sexually assaulted his victim.

By the most damning accounts, Mitchell’s abuse began at age 7 or 8 and continued until he was 14.
 

brendan f

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If the NHL were a more diverse community (like, say, the NBA) there's no way Miller would sniff a second opportunity. Sweeney said he'd drive him to the airport if this goes sideways. I hope somebody makes his face go sideways.
 

Petagine in a Bottle

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Brock Turner was 19, an actual - legal adult when he sexually assaulted his victim.

By the most damning accounts, Mitchell’s abuse began at age 7 or 8 and continued until he was 14.
That’s a long time to harass / abuse someone, no matter the age. Dude sounds like a sociopath, am sure he’s got a lot of things he needs to work through. Has he gotten professional help?

I’m ok with having a shot at redemption down the line, if he’s shown he deserves it, just disappointed that the Bruins are the team to give it to him.
 

kenneycb

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If the NHL were a more diverse community (like, say, the NBA) there's no way Miller would sniff a second opportunity. Sweeney said he'd drive him to the airport if this goes sideways. I hope somebody makes his face go sideways.
Riley Cooper says hello.
 

BostonFanInCanesLand

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1,945
I am disappointed in this signing even though I try and maintain space in camp #3.

Matt Porter tweeted 2 interesting letters from fans. The first one refers to a return to the ”hubris of the Sinden era,” called out the current gaslighting of the harm and length of the abuse, and just as poignantly criticizes leadership for putting Bergeron out in front to answer questions.

They’re both worth a read.



I hope that this hockey player expresses true remorse and becomes a better citizen but man I wish he was attempting that change in a different organization.

I think the victim's family wasn't and shouldn't be under any obligation to accept an apology, but also this kid (or any other kid) should not have his career be contingent on the family accepting an apology.

He needs to apologize sincerely (and I gather there is some disagreement about whether he did and whether it was sincere), though, whether it is accepted or not.

I'm OK with giving the kid a chance, but the Bruins need to truly have a zero tolerance policy. And I think it can be hard for an organization to take a step like this and then really have zero tolerance, because cutting him feels like admission of a mistake. I hope they know what they are doing, and there is fair reason to doubt them.

I fall in #3 myself, but since we are talking about a continued pattern of behavior here I think calling it "one strike" is minimizing it.

Someone above noted that it was not just him but rather him and another kid who terrorized the boy. That feels like it could potentially be somewhat mitigating. It brings peer pressure into it, and I think the only thing guaranteed to be worse than an asshole kid is 2 asshole kids or a group of them.

The Bruins have to really be zero tolerance here. If they are I am, and have honestly done their homework, I am cautiously OK with it, for now.
 

mcpickl

Member
SoSH Member
Jul 23, 2007
4,546
I am disgusted and incredibly disappointed in the decision to add this person to the organization.

To say nothing of the horrible things that Isaiah Meyers-Crothers was subjected to - Zdeno Chara built his leadership on zero tolerance for bullying and abuse. This flies completely in the face of that - with Sweeney admitting as much in the presser.

I hope he never plays a game at the NHL level for the Bruins. It feels like a stain on the organization.
Was going to write a post, but I would've just written something similar to this

This stinks
 

TSC

SoSH's Doug Neidermeyer
SoSH Member
Oct 25, 2007
12,280
Between here and everywhere.
Yea - regardless of my feelings about whether or not Mitchell deserves a second shot, or has shown effort to learn from, and grow from his mistakes - the Bruins have completely fucked this up.

They’ve handled it as badly as could be imagined, and have made the path for Mitchell to be successful all the harder.

No one who wasn’t hoping the kid is learning/growing is going to be after the Bruins roll out of this decision.
 

Cotillion

New Member
Jun 11, 2019
4,926
Jesus Christ. Why is Bergeron being put in this position? Why isn't it Sweeney or Neely?

This thing has become a complete clusterfuck.
It was always going to fall to the players at some point. It's just way the media scape works.

It should have been part of the decision process, but the way Sweeney botched the press conference yesterday with the whole maybe it was wrong not sure about this. I don't think they really thought this through at all.
 

FL4WL3SS

Member
SoSH Member
Jul 31, 2006
14,913
Andy Brickley's potty mouth
Brock Turner was 19, an actual - legal adult when he sexually assaulted his victim.

By the most damning accounts, Mitchell’s abuse began at age 7 or 8 and continued until he was 14.
Also, why are we playing the hypothetical game? There's no evidence he sexually abused anyone, so it really has no bearing on this conversation.

I have a 7 and an 8 year old currently. They are absolutely amazing kids that have learned that they need to be kind to other people and they generally know right from wrong, but they absolutely still say shitty things to each other and to me because they don't have self control. I'll say it again, the parents seem like garbage people and he's obviously being influenced by them. I don't give a shit about this kid and probably prefer that the Bruins didn't sign him. However, I think people deserve second chances, no matter how they get there. We can dissect his apology and the route he took to get there, but he's being influenced by a lot of people and even as a late teen, he's still impressionable.

I can also tell pretty horrific things about my childhood of how I was treated by other kids and the adults around me, but I don't see value into turning this thread into a giant therapy session.
 

Mueller's Twin Grannies

critical thinker
SoSH Member
Dec 19, 2009
9,386
Some of you grew up in places where you were never picked on habitually and it shows.

I was a fat kid all throughout my scholastic career. Fat, fishy white (in a very white area), with red hair that had a tendency to frizz up and curl in on itself when it got too long (I'll let you figure out what hair style it was often compared to or, worse, that I was encouraged to cultivate). My family wasn't poor-poor, but we weren't well off either. That meant clothing from KMart, Bradlees, Marshalls, and some catalogs. It meant being a target for the "cool" kids (since I wasn't athletic and was very shy and awkward), being ridiculed by girls when I started noticing them, and forcing myself to develop a hard, very hard, outer shell. When I changed school systems after 8th grade, I had fewer issues, but they never really went away until long after I graduated.

Some of the kids were absolute fucking monsters. I VIVIDLY remember being forced to lick a bus window by an older, bigger kid who had a reputation of being a bruiser. If I didn't, he would have punched me and I would rather be embarrassed than be in pain back then, so I did it. It was not the only such incident, but the one that stands out the most. But I still remember the name of everyone who ever bullied me, child and adult alike. I won't ever forget.

But I'm now 41 and have run into more than a few of them in the time since. No punches were thrown, no insults traded, no bad feelings after the encounters. None of them were the one who made me lick the window. That guy might not even be alive anymore (I haven't heard his name in over 30 years), but he's the only one I might ever say something to.

My point is that kids, especially in packs, are assholes. Full stop. School and social gatherings when we are young is how we begin to establish our social hierarchy, which males and females are the ones to pursue, and who the ones are to exclude (however wrong in some cases). For many, the mentality they adopt in junior or senior high is their default setting for life. For others, though, especially those who leave their small towns and see other parts of the country/world, it tends to change over time. For others, simply leaving high school is all it takes to drop the pretense and develop their "real" personality or to finally let it shine through. As I put in another thread, there are plenty of studies that show physical adulthood is not the same as mental adulthood, that our brains don't finish developing until nearly three decades of life experiences. It's simply not reality to say that who you are in high school dictates who you will always be.

Miller might still be an asshole, might always be one, but he's probably not done growing mentally and definitely wasn't back then. Was his apology sincere? Only he knows. The other person's mother may never accept the apology, which is her prerogative, but also sends kind of a fucked up message that being mean, even if it was unreasonably cruel, is not something that can ever be followed by true atonement. (The cynic in me asks why she never did anything about this when it was happening, even if it meant homeschooling him, and that her outrage reads a little like a request for reparations, but I'm going to give the benefit of the doubt and just say that she's still (or was at the time) in the "mama bear" mode.)

Miller wouldn't be the first person to turn a shitty start into a glorious finish, but he's definitely going to have to keep his head down and go out of his way to do some nice stuff before this ever really goes away. Here's hoping he can, even if it winds up being somewhere else in the end.

I'm pulling for the redemption story. You have to, in my mind, or what is the point of self-discovery and actualization? But if he flames out, it won't be the reason they don't win if they don't win.