At the game etiquette

reggiecleveland

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I hardly ever get to MLB games, so this is a question from a neophyte.

I went to Safeco the last two nights. Last night I ponied up and sat 9 rows back of home plate. An older guy behind me never shut up. He was loud and hardly paid attention to the game. I got the impression he was a season ticket holder. He went on and on about Paul McCartney and the best piano bars, and how "that youtube" is "literally fantastic". Finally between in innings I turned around and explained my son and I were hard core fans and had been waiting all year to go to this game, and he was ruining it. He almost completely shut up then around the 8th inning made a speech about how he didn't "literally live and die" baseball and went home. After the game people nearby thanked me, while another regular told me I was rude.

Two questions.
1. Was I misunderstanding what should be expected at a MLB game to get bothered by an obnoxious asshole?

2. Would I get my ass kicked in other MLB parks, when dressed in the opposing teams gear and making a similar request?
 

luckysox

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Probably rude, but also kind of awesome. Everyone pays their money, I guess, so they get to do what they want at a game, as long as it's not breaking stadium rules, etc. But it sucks when this sort of thing happens and it affects your ability to enjoy the same game for which you paid the same price to watch as he did. That is to say, if you had said it to me if I were chatty, I'd be pissed, but since you said it to a guy who likely would have annoyed me, too, then it was awesome.
 

joe dokes

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I think its alright. And definitely awesome. I have a related perspective....

I haven't gone to many games the last few years. And when I have, I've met friends there I haven't seen in awhile. So there might be an inning or two of catching up, but its most often close to 9 innings of non-stop chatter about baseball. Sometimes the game in front of us, sometimes not. But I keep score, so I'm paying attention. We've been politely asked to give it a rest. I guess I'm self aware enough to know that several innings of even my sustained brilliance can be too much :cool:, so as long as the person is reasonably polite about it, I apologize and slow down for awhile. 99% of the time it ends up in enjoyable chats with strangers. (keeping score helps. Its the baseball-chat equivalent of a single guy going to the park with a dog).

So yeah, I think, "my son can't really pay attention to the game with you yammering on" is perfectly acceptable.

The flip side is when people talk to each other about stuff like they think no one can hear them -- or is listening. "And then about a week later, I started getting these sores. Both my wife and my girlfriend were pissed. How am I going to explain this to The Bishop."
 

pokey_reese

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I've probably been on both sides of this situation over the years, and really, I think it's fine as long as the tone is civil. If you had turned around and yelled "Hey asshole, you're ruining the game and if you don't shut your mouth I will shut it for you," then sure, that's rude. But generally, I don't think that there is anything wrong with letting overly loud public speakers know that they aren't the only people on earth.
 

hrbrendan

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As long as you deliver the message in a sane way, it's fine to explain to someone that their behavior is affecting your enjoyment of the game. You can't necessarily expect them to change said behavior, but it can't hurt to give it a shot. Most people don't want to be negatively affecting the enjoyment of others on a regular basis. He probably made the exit speech more out of feeling embarrassed about being called out on it than anything else.

To answer your questions directly... You kinda are a little off base thinking that you can go to a game without being annoyed by at least one obnoxious asshole within earshot, its simply a numbers thing and there are lots of them out there. Bad luck that he was right behind you, but I'd say it's probably a 50/50 chance that one will be there.

I wouldn't worry about getting my ass kicked 9 rows behind home plate saying something, but you might have gotten a different reaction in the cheap seats.
 

Minneapolis Millers

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First, have you been paying any attention to the Presidential election? There is not such thing as etiquette in America any more.

Beyond that, loud is loud, but I tend to distinguish between people talking passionately about the game and people just yapping away about other stuff. If they're loud AND not paying attention, then yes, I certainly think you have the right to ask them to tone it down. If they're just cheering and talking about the game loudly? I cut those people more slack (because I often fall into that camp).

Last, there are regional differences. In the Midwest, people are far more likely to move away from you if you're loud than confront you. The coasts are more aggressive. And then there's Philly...
 

mauidano

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I think its alright. And definitely awesome. I have a related perspective....

The flip side is when people talk to each other about stuff like they think no one can hear them -- or is listening. "And then about a week later, I started getting these sores. Both my wife and my girlfriend were pissed. How am I going to explain this to The Bishop."
That would be awesome! At that point, I'm turning around with rapt attention, "Go on...."
 

mauidano

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Savin Hillbilly

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The wrong side of the bridge....
I may be a minority of one here, but I've never thought of the ballpark as a place where I had to worry about bothering people by talking. It's a pretty loud, open-air environment, and sound is not a crucial part of the entertainment--it's not like it's a concert hall or a movie house. Usually if I'm talking at the park it's about the game, but not always. If somebody told me that my friends and I were annoying them by talking, I might be outwardly apologetic. But inwardly, I must admit, I would be flipping them an energetic bird.

I mean, can't you just ignore it?
 

Red(s)HawksFan

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I may be a minority of one here, but I've never thought of the ballpark as a place where I had to worry about bothering people by talking. It's a pretty loud, open-air environment, and sound is not a crucial part of the entertainment--it's not like it's a concert hall or a movie house. Usually if I'm talking at the park it's about the game, but not always. If somebody told me that my friends and I were annoying them by talking, I might be outwardly apologetic. But inwardly, I must admit, I would be flipping them an energetic bird.

I mean, can't you just ignore it?
This is where I fall, especially if the people being annoying are behind you. All I want out of people sitting behind me at the park is to not kick my seat (or the back of my head) and not spill anything on me. I couldn't care less what they're talking about, and only if they're shouting unnecessarily more or less in my ear would I think to ask them to keep it down. If I can't see them, I can pretty easily tune them out.

People sitting in front of me is a different story though. Those folks best be sitting down and paying attention to the game for the most part. Seems like every time I'm at Fenway, the people sitting directly in front of my seat are up and down the whole freaking game running to concessions or the bathroom or who knows where. It's always while there's action on the field and it's almost always blocking my view of the pitcher or the plate or both. Fortunately, these types of folks seem to arrive in the 2nd and are gone by the 7th or 8th regardless of the score.
 

snowmanny

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As long as people aren't 1) spilling beer on me or 2) vomiting on me or 3) screaming something inane like "STEROIDS! STEROIDS!" over and over when nobody else is chanting or 4) are one of the (nearing extinction) Yankee fans who scream about how crappy the Red Sox are and then get really angry an hour later when you point out that Mariano or whoever just blew another lead I'm OK with pretty much anything.

The worst non beer-spilling/vomiting/stupid chanter/Yankee fan I ever had near me was Game 7 of the 2007 ALCS when I sat next to a fat man who loudly repeated two things over and over and over; "Matsuzaka sucks and the Red Sox have no chance to win" and "These seats are too small and it's stupid to go to a ball game instead of just watching it at home." It was incredibly annoying but some point he got a phone call and then hung up and called his wife and loudly told her "turn all the lights off and if the police come don't answer the door." After that he became a little bit subdued and the various Sox bombs seemed to settle him more.
 

Al Zarilla

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As long as people aren't 1) spilling beer on me or 2) vomiting on me or 3) screaming something inane like "STEROIDS! STEROIDS!" over and over when nobody else is chanting or 4) are one of the (nearing extinction) Yankee fans who scream about how crappy the Red Sox are and then get really angry an hour later when you point out that Mariano or whoever just blew another lead I'm OK with pretty much anything.

The worst non beer-spilling/vomiting/stupid chanter/Yankee fan I ever had near me was Game 7 of the 2007 ALCS when I sat next to a fat man who loudly repeated two things over and over and over; "Matsuzaka sucks and the Red Sox have no chance to win" and "These seats are too small and it's stupid to go to a ball game instead of just watching it at home." It was incredibly annoying but some point he got a phone call and then hung up and called his wife and loudly told her "turn all the lights off and if the police come don't answer the door." After that he became a little bit subdued and the various Sox bombs seemed to settle him more.
You couldn't just say hey, your team isn't in this. They were defeated by midges! Asshole.
 

Pandemonium67

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There's conversing and then there's loud-mouthing. Some people naturally have the ability to converse in a voice and at a volume that is not disruptive to neighbors. Others are clueless about this. You see them walking down the street on cell phones, talking really, really loudly, or bellowing in restaurants. It's unnecessary, inconsiderate, and tacky.

When you're in a crowd, there is guaranteed to be a loudmouth or two nearby. If they're really nearby, you're screwed. You have to either suffer in silence or be push out of your natural comfort zone and ask them to pipe down. This is especially annoying at concerts. There's nothing like forking over a bunch of money and standing right behind two loudmouth assholes who won't shut up.

Reggie, you were very right to hush that loudmouth. If enough people do it, maybe he'll get a clue.
 

mauf

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Sometimes I have to hear strangers' annoying conversations at the ballpark. So it goes. If it bothered me that much, I'd watch at home on TV, where I don't have to listen to strangers talk.
 

reggiecleveland

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I see all sides of what people say. I go for what Pandemonium67 says about the general loudmouth idea, and that was what it was about. There were fans yelling stuff all game, one guy called JBJ, Mookie, and X "peewee" all game was he racist? It is part of the game that people yell dumb shit. Guy in front of me had many crazy ideas like Mookie owed all of his success to Fenway, but most of the time I didn't hear him. I did hear him say he had tickets for many years and did not remember Pedro ever losing in Seattle. It was a Ballgame so there was lots of noise. But, I think you should not act like everyone else is not there. My feeling is there is a tacit agreement to shut up the half second the ball is in on the way to the plate.

At any rate I wish I could go to more games since it is a fantastic experience. Some random Sox fan high fived me on Holt's hit, and hundreds of Sox fans celebrated on the way out of the park. This guy probably got on my nerves since I would love to have the opportunity to go to games and it pissed me off that Piano Bar had so little appreciation of MLB athletes.
 

Papelbon's Poutine

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I'm definitely with Savin and RHF here. It's a ballpark. There's inherently going to be ass holes and things that distract you from the game. This is, in part, why we have nets now protecting half the infield. It's unfortunate but next use it as a teaching moment for your son. That while you have the right to talk loudly about other stuff, it's at least somewhat inconsiderate to those around you or at least can be.

Bottom line is it's not the library and while people can talk louder than they think they are or in fact don't even care about, unless they're shouting obscenities or being truly obnoxious it's probably best to just deal with it. While you and your son were most likely not in this category, there's been many times I've gone to a game and bratty kids have tampered my enjoyment. Learn to live with it as a cost of going to the game, much like parking and paying $5 for a hot dog.
 

Average Reds

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I may be a minority of one here, but I've never thought of the ballpark as a place where I had to worry about bothering people by talking. It's a pretty loud, open-air environment, and sound is not a crucial part of the entertainment--it's not like it's a concert hall or a movie house. Usually if I'm talking at the park it's about the game, but not always. If somebody told me that my friends and I were annoying them by talking, I might be outwardly apologetic. But inwardly, I must admit, I would be flipping them an energetic bird.

I mean, can't you just ignore it?
Big difference between talking to a friend in conversation voice (even a plainly audible voice) and having a rude asshole impose himself on you from a few rows away because he wants to be the center of attention, which sounds like the situation here.

Every situation is context-dependent, but from the description I think the corrective actions here are borderline rude but appropriate. (And effective, which was more important.)
 

JohntheBaptist

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Big difference between talking to a friend in conversation voice (even a plainly audible voice) and having a rude asshole impose himself on you from a few rows away because he wants to be the center of attention, which sounds like the situation here.

Every situation is context-dependent, but from the description I think the corrective actions here are borderline rude but appropriate. (And effective, which was more important.)
Exactly. The one thing the "well just ignore it" folks are forgetting is that some people get real performative in these type situations. Attention-seeking. Sometimes that's doing something you wouldn't think twice about trying to shut down with confrontation, and then there are those people that just love to sit on the line and dare you not to. I can respect not giving in because that's obviously part of what they're after, but it is hard.

I don't think the story on its face sounds like something worth intervening on, but these things really depend on the specifics. If it was a good natured eccentric old guy prattling on, probably worth it to let it go. If its a boorish dick trying to piss people off into talking to him, he probably deserved it.
 

Rasputin

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At any rate I wish I could go to more games since it is a fantastic experience. Some random Sox fan high fived me on Holt's hit, and hundreds of Sox fans celebrated on the way out of the park. This guy probably got on my nerves since I would love to have the opportunity to go to games and it pissed me off that Piano Bar had so little appreciation of MLB athletes.
When it's a playoff game and you stave off elimination with a Trot Nixon home run in the 11th, you get hugs from complete strangers.
 

reggiecleveland

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o clarify I spoke to the guy's buddies while he was at the can. When he returned they stated a desire to focus on the game that threw him off, I assume from his speech they told him what I said at some point.
 

DennyDoyle'sBoil

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I basically got told to STFU at a game once. Not directly but the guy was acting annoyed for an inning or two (without me understanding why) and then told whoever he was with loud enough for me to hear that I was annoying.

Totally fair. I was basically game threading out loud.
 

dhappy42

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I basically got told to STFU at a game once. Not directly but the guy was acting annoyed for an inning or two (without me understanding why) and then told whoever he was with loud enough for me to hear that I was annoying.

Totally fair. I was basically game threading out loud.
Personally, I don't mind, and sometimes enjoy, people around me in the stands talking loudly as long as it's about the the game or about baseball. What irks me is when someone nearby fills the airspace with loud chatter about other stuff -- describing their most recent vacation, troubles at home, idle gossip or, worst of all, politics. I find that extremely annoying and disrespectful, like people who talk loudly in movie theaters or restaurants. It doesn't seem like that difficult a concept to grasp: don't selfishly ruin other people's ability to enjoy the movie, their meal... or the ballgame.
 

dhappy42

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Oh, and here's a trick I'll use when someone's chattering about non-baseball stuff at the game and they're sitting directly in front, behind or next to me.

I usually keep score in a scorebook. I enjoy the game more that way for some reason. Maybe it's because I used to score games when I watched them on TV or at Fenway as a kid. Or maybe I'm just a geek.

Anyway, when there's an annoying chatterbox nearby, I'll politely interrupt them and ask, "Was that a ball or a strike?" Or "What the last batter do?" They never have any idea, but it throws them off their story and sometimes reminds them that they're at a baseball game with other people who are interested in watching the game instead of listening to their story about little Susie's elementary school play or their girlfriend's divorce or whatever. Sometimes it takes two or three questions to get the point across. It's better than saying, "Please shut the fuck up."
 

HomeRunBaker

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Don't do what Drunk 25-yr old Yankee fan did in my one and only visit to the old toilet. What I mean by that is do not drink beer for 7 innings then urinate on the grandstand seats in front of you while standing in front of 40k people and you should be ok.

True story btw.
 

Don Buddin's GS

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Born and raised in MA; lived in MI for the last 35 years. My younger daughter and I got harassed by drunks at Comerica when we wore full Red Sox regalia. Since then I have worn a Sox hat and Tigers shirt. If anyone asks I say "Born here (and point to the hat); live here (pointing to the shirt).

No problems.
 

DJnVa

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It was incredibly annoying but some point he got a phone call and then hung up and called his wife and loudly told her "turn all the lights off and if the police come don't answer the door." After that he became a little bit subdued and the various Sox bombs seemed to settle him more.
I'm trying to imagine making that kind of call and not immediately leaving the ballpark.
 

TonyPenaNeverJuiced

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I work music festivals and know that a large chunk of my audience is not really there for the music. Sure, they like the bands, sure, they'll "dance" or sing along, but really, it's a place to drink (or do drugs...), hang with friends, and say you were there. The same is true for baseball games, or any sports game.

And the reason I can't fret too much about it is that, as a business, I need those people. I don't like, personally, the "type" of fan they are, but I need their money, I need them going and getting a lot of beers - I hate that part of the business, but it allows the other 50% to see the big name acts they came for, to get great food options, or heck, have more than ample port-o-lets. And I think stadiums are the same way, and teams view it the same as well.

Baseball is entertainment. It's ~3 hours of programming, masquerading as competition. I went to the Dodgers game yesterday and the entire game, the guy behind me was, in a low and non-booming voice, getting tons of information wrong, making up stats, etc. - maybe he was trying to impress someone, maybe he's an idiot. But that's not my problem. In front of me, in the real nice seats, people were getting up to talk to someone a few rows over, staying standing - look, as long as you're not in my sightline, I can't really be upset. I'd rather they stop playing ads in the stadium than anything else.
 

dhappy42

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I work music festivals and know that a large chunk of my audience is not really there for the music. Sure, they like the bands, sure, they'll "dance" or sing along, but really, it's a place to drink (or do drugs...), hang with friends, and say you were there. The same is true for baseball games, or any sports game.

And the reason I can't fret too much about it is that, as a business, I need those people. I don't like, personally, the "type" of fan they are, but I need their money, I need them going and getting a lot of beers - I hate that part of the business, but it allows the other 50% to see the big name acts they came for, to get great food options, or heck, have more than ample port-o-lets. And I think stadiums are the same way, and teams view it the same as well.

Baseball is entertainment. It's ~3 hours of programming, masquerading as competition. I went to the Dodgers game yesterday and the entire game, the guy behind me was, in a low and non-booming voice, getting tons of information wrong, making up stats, etc. - maybe he was trying to impress someone, maybe he's an idiot. But that's not my problem. In front of me, in the real nice seats, people were getting up to talk to someone a few rows over, staying standing - look, as long as you're not in my sightline, I can't really be upset. I'd rather they stop playing ads in the stadium than anything else.
I see your point, but think a baseball game is -- or should be -- more analogous to a music concert than a music festival. Festivals, by their nature, are more social than concerts.

Bottom line for me is: enjoy yourself, but don't infringe on the enjoyment of others. And if someone politely and reasonably tells you that you're bothering them, making it difficult for them to enjoy the game, then stop bothering them and let them enjoy the game. This, unfortunately, includes swearing around young children. Or maybe not. Have to think about that one.
 

joe dokes

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I see your point, but think a baseball game is -- or should be -- more analogous to a music concert than a music festival. Festivals, by their nature, are more social than concerts.

Bottom line for me is: enjoy yourself, but don't infringe on the enjoyment of others. And if someone politely and reasonably tells you that you're bothering them, making it difficult for them to enjoy the game, then stop bothering them and let them enjoy the game. This, unfortunately, includes swearing around young children. Or maybe not. Have to think about that one.
I've been on both sides of the swearing thing -- both the father and the swearer (at different times, about 20 years apart!) We, the swearers apologized. Years later, the swearers apologized to me, picked up where they left off about an inning later, but to their credit seemingly realized they couldn't control themselves and went somewhere else. Fortunately, neither situation involved any hostility.

I'm curious.....out of all the possible permutations, from reggieclevelands original post to the other situations discussed, "swearing around young children" seems to me to be the easiest one. What's there to think about?
 

glasspusher

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Reggie,
I think you did the right thing. I suppose letting people know sooner and gentler might be better, but everybody has their breaking point. If you're in the 9th row, I'd expect folks to be a bit more focused on the game. Shit, I'll bring a glove if my seats are further back than that. I can be a loudmouth (usually only on days ending with the letter 'y') but I've never been told to STFU at a ballpark.
 

Adrian's Dome

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An older guy behind me never shut up. He was loud and hardly paid attention to the game. I got the impression he was a season ticket holder. He went on and on about Paul McCartney and the best piano bars, and how "that youtube" is "literally fantastic".
Five years ago I took my mother to Fenway for her first time ever. We had essentially this same douchebag sitting behind us, he was intent the entire time on loudly pointing out tourist attractions in Boston on his iPad to his group.

After three innings, she turned around and politely pointed out that, at 53 years old it was her first time seeing a live baseball game of a team she was a lifelong fan of with her son, and if he wasn't interested in the game, he should leave. He replied "I paid money for this ticket," and she said "I didn't. My son did." He stopped, a bit begrudgingly, but it worked.

Point is, if it passes the mom test, it's all good.
 

dhappy42

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I've been on both sides of the swearing thing -- both the father and the swearer (at different times, about 20 years apart!) We, the swearers apologized. Years later, the swearers apologized to me, picked up where they left off about an inning later, but to their credit seemingly realized they couldn't control themselves and went somewhere else. Fortunately, neither situation involved any hostility.

I'm curious.....out of all the possible permutations, from reggieclevelands original post to the other situations discussed, "swearing around young children" seems to me to be the easiest one. What's there to think about?
It's not "swearing around young children" per se that's the issue. Instead, it's whether parents of young children should have the expectation that people at baseball games should not swear around their young children. In a way, people swilling beer and swearing at ballgames is part of the ballgame experience. If you don't want your young, impressionable kids to hear swearing or see drunk people, you can not take them to ballgames (or bars, for that matter.) On the other hand, taking young kids to a ballgame is, in itself, also part of the baseball tradition, so... I gotta think about it.

I'm a devout believer in the Church of Baseball, but a baseball stadium is not a church. People have been drinking and swearing at ballparks for as long as there's been ballparks.
 

Papelbon's Poutine

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It's not "swearing around young children" per se that's the issue. Instead, it's whether parents of young children should have the expectation that people at baseball games should not swear around their young children. In a way, people swilling beer and swearing at ballgames is part of the ballgame experience. If you don't want your young, impressionable kids to hear swearing or see drunk people, you can not take them to ballgames (or bars, for that matter.) On the other hand, taking young kids to a ballgame is, in itself, also part of the baseball tradition, so... I gotta think about it.

I'm a devout believer in the Church of Baseball, but a baseball stadium is not a church. People have been drinking and swearing at ballparks for as long as there's been ballparks.
So it's ok to swear around children - because parents should expect it - but if the guy in front of you is talking about something other than the game and it distracts you from keeping score they should stfu - because of your romantic memories of childhood?

Just want to make sure I have it straight.
 

JohntheBaptist

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Being able to talk about something that has nothing to do with baseball is one of the great parts of watching baseball. If you want to pick apart an old Mad Men rerun, or shoot the shit about the election--that is not even close to grounds for being yelled at or scolded at a baseball game. That's totally insane.

It's the delivery. You could be talking in-depth about some tremendous fangraphs article or how well JBJ goes 1st-to-3rd but if you're doing it so everyone can hear you and appreciate your genius, someone should tell you to stfu and it might be me.

Also, as always, it's common decency to avoid cursing in public because children, and this includes baseball games. That being said, baseball games provide excellent excuses for cursing (David Ortiz; David Price) and so it shouldn't be something you can expect to avoid entirely.
 

Zupcic Fan

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You never know who's paying attention to what you're saying. When my youngest daughter was about 8 I brought her to a game at Fenway, and my friend Vinnie and I pretty much ignored her other than to buy her food. When we got home, my ex wife asked her how she liked the game. She kind of welled up and said "Daddy and Vinnie said the F word 44 times!"
 

dhappy42

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So it's ok to swear around children - because parents should expect it - but if the guy in front of you is talking about something other than the game and it distracts you from keeping score they should stfu - because of your romantic memories of childhood?

Just want to make sure I have it straight.
Well, if you want to make sure to get it straight, you should re-read what I wrote a little more carefully and stop being unnecessarily argumentative.
 

dhappy42

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Being able to talk about something that has nothing to do with baseball is one of the great parts of watching baseball. If you want to pick apart an old Mad Men rerun, or shoot the shit about the election--that is not even close to grounds for being yelled at or scolded at a baseball game. That's totally insane.
True. I don't think the complaint is about people who talk about non-baseball stuff at ballgames. It's about people who talk LOUDLY about anything and ruin the enjoyment of the others around them.

Also, as always, it's common decency to avoid cursing in public because children, and this includes baseball games. That being said, baseball games provide excellent excuses for cursing (David Ortiz; David Price) and so it shouldn't be something you can expect to avoid entirely.
So you're on the fence too. :^)
 

Adrian's Dome

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Aug 6, 2010
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It's not "swearing around young children" per se that's the issue. Instead, it's whether parents of young children should have the expectation that people at baseball games should not swear around their young children. In a way, people swilling beer and swearing at ballgames is part of the ballgame experience. If you don't want your young, impressionable kids to hear swearing or see drunk people, you can not take them to ballgames (or bars, for that matter.) On the other hand, taking young kids to a ballgame is, in itself, also part of the baseball tradition, so... I gotta think about it.

I'm a devout believer in the Church of Baseball, but a baseball stadium is not a church. People have been drinking and swearing at ballparks for as long as there's been ballparks.
Well, there is a no alcohol section in Fenway. Doesn't entirely fix the swearing issue, but it probably alleviates a ton of it. Plus, fuck your kids.
 

Papelbon's Poutine

Homeland Security
SoSH Member
Dec 4, 2005
19,615
Portsmouth, NH
Well, if you want to make sure to get it straight, you should re-read what I wrote a little more carefully and stop being unnecessarily argumentative.
I'm not being unnecessarily argumentative. I'm trying to reconcile statements like this

Oh, and here's a trick I'll use when someone's chattering about non-baseball stuff at the game and they're sitting directly in front, behind or next to me.

I usually keep score in a scorebook. I enjoy the game more that way for some reason. Maybe it's because I used to score games when I watched them on TV or at Fenway as a kid. Or maybe I'm just a geek.

Anyway, when there's an annoying chatterbox nearby, I'll politely interrupt them and ask, "Was that a ball or a strike?" Or "What the last batter do?" They never have any idea, but it throws them off their story and sometimes reminds them that they're at a baseball game with other people who are interested in watching the game instead of listening to their story about little Susie's elementary school play or their girlfriend's divorce or whatever. Sometimes it takes two or three questions to get the point across. It's better than saying, "Please shut the fuck up."
And this.

It's not "swearing around young children" per se that's the issue. Instead, it's whether parents of young children should have the expectation that people at baseball games should not swear around their young children. In a way, people swilling beer and swearing at ballgames is part of the ballgame experience. If you don't want your young, impressionable kids to hear swearing or see drunk people, you can not take them to ballgames (or bars, for that matter.) On the other hand, taking young kids to a ballgame is, in itself, also part of the baseball tradition, so... I gotta think about it.

I'm a devout believer in the Church of Baseball, but a baseball stadium is not a church. People have been drinking and swearing at ballparks for as long as there's been ballparks.
I assure you I read what you wrote and while I know you talked in a previous post about the volume of said person, I'm not seeing how the people directly behind, next to or in front of you can have an audible conversation without you being able to hear it. Loud and obnoxious is loud and obnoxious, so I don't see the difference what the subject matter is. Saying those people impact the enjoyment of others is stating the obvious. I'm just as annoyed by some ass hole screaming at the pitcher as I am about someone talking loudly about their date last night. But you seem to be ok with loud and obnoxious if it's about the game, but not with off topic subject matter, which seems odd to me.

So again, I'm not being argumentative, I'm wondering how you don't see it as at least somewhat hypocritical - parents should expect their children to hear swearing when they go to the park, because it's the Church of baseball and it's part of the game, so it's ok that their experience is ruined. But you shouldn't have to expect to be able to hear someone talk unless it's about the game because it ruins your experience.

Shouldn't both sides either accept it as part of the deal or speak up and say something? I'm pretty sure people have talked about things other than the game just as long as they've drank and sworn. Does swearing in a restaurant next to a table of kids fly? People have been drinking and swearing in restaurants forever too.

It's awesome that you like to zone in, keep a scorecard and talk the game. I'm not being sarcastic there. I generally only go to games with a handful of people because I also enjoy the company of others that appreciate the game and I generally give shit to people that go to games as a social event with no interest. Which is why I only go to a handful of games a year. Because I expect obnoxious people to be there and frankly I don't care what they are talking about. But yes, it's antiquated to expect that experience at a ballpark in today's age. Or anywhere in modern society, when you get down to it. People are inconsiderate. Best to either prepare or avoid. Otherwise, the terrorists win.

Look, basically, you're trying to make two points:
- people should be respectful of those around them and act within social boundaries of acceptable behavior - I totally agree and I don't think anyone disagrees with that; ideal world and all; I assure you I deal with ignorant ass holes far more often than you do, on a daily basis in fact; people suck; no one is arguing that and it's pointless to mention it. Kittens are also cute.
- people should understand the environment they are entering and be ready and willing to accept the consequences of that - I totally agree

Where I draw issue is that for some reason you think expecting people to swear at a park in front of kids should be expected, but people talking at levels within earshot about subjects other than the game shouldn't be? Being inconsiderate enough to swear in front of children is kosher but talking about their vacation isn't. It strikes me as hypocritical. And it strikes me that, yes, you have an unrealistic expectation when going to a ballpark based on the romantic memories of your childhood. And your Church of Baseball. We all have those memories and you specifically mentioned them. It just might be time to adjust them.
 
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HriniakPosterChild

Member
SoSH Member
Jul 6, 2006
14,841
500 feet above Lake Sammammish
After three innings, she turned around and politely pointed out that, at 53 years old it was her first time seeing a live baseball game of a team she was a lifelong fan of with her son, and if he wasn't interested in the game, he should leave. He replied "I paid money for this ticket," ...
This reminds me of a game I went to at Fenway in the 1980's with a friend who had asthma. He asked a lady nearby who lit up a cigarette if she would put it out, and she said, "No. I don't have to." Except that yours had a happier ending. (Grandstands, not bleachers, if that makes a difference.)
 

dhappy42

Straw Man
Oct 27, 2013
15,725
Michigan
I'm not being unnecessarily argumentative. I'm trying to reconcile statements like this...
And this....
Reconcile statements? You some kind of linguistic accountant?


I assure you I read what you wrote and while I know you talked in a previous post about the volume of said person, I'm not seeing how the people directly behind, next to or in front of you can have an audible conversation without you being able to hear it. Loud and obnoxious is loud and obnoxious, so I don't see the difference what the subject matter is. Saying those people impact the enjoyment of others is stating the obvious. I'm just as annoyed by some ass hole screaming at the pitcher as I am about someone talking loudly about their date last night. But you seem to be ok with loud and obnoxious if it's about the game, but not with off topic subject matter, which seems odd to me.

So again, I'm not being argumentative...
Yeah, you kinda are. Seems to me like you're looking for a fight over the definition of "loud and obnoxious" or something.


I'm wondering how you don't see it as at least somewhat hypocritical - parents should expect their children to hear swearing when they go to the park, because it's the Church of baseball and it's part of the game, so it's ok that their experience is ruined. But you shouldn't have to expect to be able to hear someone talk unless it's about the game because it ruins your experience.
I see the problem now. I didn't say I expect not to be able to hear people talk at baseball games unless they're talking about baseball games. I expect to hear people talk about all sorts of stuff. I also expect to hear fans swear. I expect some of them to stand up a lot and block people's view, spill their beer on other people and for a few to pick drunken fights. I also expect most fans will behave well, to offer to switch seats to give a young kid a better view, to pass hot dogs down a row in one direction and money in the other and to not make a bathroom/concession run with runners on base in a close game.


It's awesome that you like to zone in, keep a scorecard and talk the game. I'm not being sarcastic there. I generally only go to games with a handful of people because I also enjoy the company of others that appreciate the game and I generally give shit to people that go to games as a social event with no interest. Which is why I only go to a handful of games a year. Because I expect obnoxious people to be there and frankly I don't care what they are talking about.
First, thanks for the non-sarcastic recognition of my baseball fan awesomeness. Second, I too expect to be seated near the occasional obnoxious person at a ballgame. I'm not at all clear about why you're giving me a hard time about (a) sharing a trick that sometimes gets inconsiderate chatterboxes to pipe down and (b) recognizing, as you do, that lots of fans swear at ballgames and that that's part of the ballpark experience... in my experience, at least. (In my experience, back in the '70s, a bleacher seat ticket was a two-fer. You got to watch a ballgame AND at least one fight. Sometimes even a WWE-style brawl.) Why is swearing -- "Fucking Farrell! Take the bum out already!!!" -- different from someone telling eight rows of baseball fans in every direction all about their neighbor's divorce or their trip to Disneyland? Dunno. To me, it just is


But yes, it's antiquated to expect that experience at a ballpark in today's age. Or anywhere in modern society, when you get down to it. People are inconsiderate. Best to either prepare or avoid. Otherwise, the terrorists win.
"Prepare or avoid" is my motto too. It's good advice, especially if you have small, impressionable children with limited "colorful" vocabularies. Asking someone politely to pipe down or temper the cuss words isn't bad either. Be careful out there, though. Some people can be touchy.


Look, basically, you're trying to make two points:
- people should be respectful of those around them and act within social boundaries of acceptable behavior - I totally agree and I don't think anyone disagrees with that; ideal world and all; I assure you I deal with ignorant ass holes far more often than you do, on a daily basis in fact; people suck; no one is arguing that and it's pointless to mention it. Kittens are also cute.
- people should understand the environment they are entering and be ready and willing to accept the consequences of that - I totally agree
You put it so much more succinctly than I did. Thanks.


Where I draw issue is that for some reason you think expecting people to swear at a park in front of kids should be expected, but people talking at levels within earshot about subjects other than the game shouldn't be?
That's not what I said at all. Or, at least, it's not what I meant. Again, I expect both. And it's not people talking audibly about whatever that's obnoxious. Everyone does that at a game. It's "loud talkers." (Wasn't there a Seinfeld episode about this?)


Being inconsiderate enough to swear in front of children is kosher but talking about their vacation isn't. It strikes me as hypocritical.
You're belaboring the point, so I'll belabor my reply. You've misunderstood and are mis-stating my position. First, I said I don't really know where I stand on the matter of swearing at ballgames when there' are kids nearby. That should have been obvious from the "On the other hand..." Personally, I wouldn't do it. I'm not sure I'd be too critical of fans that did, though. Second, I didn't say talking about your vacation isn't kosher. I said annoying the people sitting around you and ruining their ballpark experience is rude. It's bad manners.


And it strikes me that, yes, you have an unrealistic expectation when going to a ballpark based on the romantic memories of your childhood. And your Church of Baseball. We all have those memories and you specifically mentioned them. It just might be time to adjust them.
Thanks, but I'm already reasonably well-adjusted, not especially nostalgic about my childhood memories of Fenway and attend ballgames with a fairly low expectation of fan behavior. But then, I live in Michigan now, so most games I attend are in Detroit where the fans are somewhat less... hmm, how to put this... less revelrous and less reverent. The "Church of Baseball" thing was a Bull Durham reference, by the way. Seriously, Paps, lighten up a little.
 
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biollante

Well-Known Member
Lifetime Member
SoSH Member
Nov 22, 2001
9,825
Land formerly of Sowheag
My friend had tickets to some games last year in the bleachers. She warned me that a bunch of women sat in front of her and were distracting. When I reached the game and sat down, these women spoke loudly and didn't watch the game at all. They should have just gone to a bar. At first it was funny, then it was sad. At one point, I finally just left and stood in SRO somewhere. Not as bad as the time that some guy got horribly drunk and peed his pants in the bleachers, but close.
 

dhappy42

Straw Man
Oct 27, 2013
15,725
Michigan
I
My friend had tickets to some games last year in the bleachers. She warned me that a bunch of women sat in front of her and were distracting. When I reached the game and sat down, these women spoke loudly and didn't watch the game at all. They should have just gone to a bar. At first it was funny, then it was sad. At one point, I finally just left and stood in SRO somewhere. Not as bad as the time that some guy got horribly drunk and peed his pants in the bleachers, but close.
It mystifies me why anyone would pay $50-$100 or more for a ticket to a baseball game and then not watch it.