User:Dlew on roids
From SoSH
| Born: | Changes |
| Birthplace: | |
| Height: | 6'5" |
| Weight: | 250 |
| Bats: | Right |
| Throws: | Right |
| Drafted: | Selective Service window expired |
| College: | |
| High School: | Yorktown H.S., Arlington, VA |
| ETA: | The Fung Wah is unpredictable |
This page has the Official Sille Skrub Stamp of Approval. Well Done!
In many ways, DLew on Roids is the conscience of SOSH. His commitment to moral straightness and rectitude was never more publicly apparent than during the infamous Goat-Fucking Incident. DLew was walking along the road to Nazareth when he did espy a goatherd in a field. "O goatherd," said DLew, "what doest thou?" And the goatherd responded, "I am fucking this goat." And DLew said, "Fie! Fuck ye not goats, but follow me; and I shall find ye a fine woman with whom to cavort and frolic; and I will film this frolicking for distribution on YouTube; and after that we can all go to Phil's and have sandwiches." And the goatherd fell to his knees and said, "you must be DLew, the prophet from Neehidles and that great purveyor of sandwiches about whom so much is written and said." And DLew said, "It is true that I am that man; now put your pants on." And so the goatherd followed with him until they came to a crossroads and were run down by a bus.
Moment in the Sun
- He once filled up an entire toilet with pee bubbles
Trivia
- Is rumored to love tequila. No confirmation on this.
- Has an inside-out belly button
- Has a daughter with a "stripper" name.
- The Gatekeeper of Row 14.
