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8/14 - Alas, poor Varitek . . .


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#1 Infield Infidel


  • teaching korea american


  • 7986 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 04:09 AM

Alas, poor Varitek! I knew him, Martinez: a fellow
of infinite jest, of most excellent captaincy: he hath
borne the Sox on his back a thousand times; and now, how
abhorred in my imagination it is! His bat whiffs at
it. Here hung those curveballs he had hit I know
not how oft. Where be your might now? Your
contact? Your swings? Your flashes of power,
that were wont to set the crowd on a roar? Not one
now, to mock your old Heidi? Quite cap-fallen?
Now get you to Lester's chamber, and tell him paint
the corners an inch thick, to this favour he must
come; make them swing at that.



Win this shit you impotent bastards

Edited by Infield Infidel, 14 August 2009 - 04:18 AM.


#2 I am an Idiot


  • "Duke"


  • 3458 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 06:51 AM

Half-hidden in a grave yard,

In the blackness of a yew,

Where never living creatur stirs,

Nor sunbeam pierces through'


Is a tomb-stone, green and crooked -

Its faded legend gone -

With one rain-worn captain's head

To sing of the unknown.

#3 TheoShmeo


  • made johnny damon think long and hard


  • 8187 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 07:45 AM

Three more games without the Youks,
three more games for David's "I'm distracted" excuse.

Sadly, I'm solidly with Nicky Cafardo,
the focus now is strictly on the wild cardo.

True, they're not quite the MFTs
but until now, those Rangers have handled our boys with ease.

I'll end this abortion with the plea that the BoSox solve the Millwood,
as beating quality starters is always good.




#4 Foulkey Reese


  • foulkiavelli


  • 20075 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 07:54 AM

So realistically these are probably the biggest games of the season to date right?

Kind of crucial to win Lester's start tonight with Penny and the noob going after him.



#5 asection8

  • 1151 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 08:09 AM

Stand fast blessed spirits; do not waver
Lest time make merry fools of hearts undone.
Pains given are fleeting! One must Savor
The quest! Enjoy the sights--the trees, the sun!



Of course, winning is nice too.




Edited by asection8, 14 August 2009 - 08:22 AM.


#6 Trlicek's Whip

  • 2953 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 08:10 AM

If we Red Sox have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended,
That you have but slumber'd here-
Our Wild Card visions do appear.

And our weak and idle team
No more yielding but a dream,
Gentles, do not reprehend:
if you pardon, we will mend...

Edited by Trlicek's Whip, 14 August 2009 - 08:12 AM.


#7 barbed wire Bob


  • crippled by fear


  • 3188 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 08:40 AM

More matter with less art.

#8 CantKeepmedown

  • 362 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 08:52 AM

Just Fucking Win

#9 mt8thsw9th


  • anti-SoSHal


  • 13954 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 08:53 AM

QUOTE (Foulkey Reese @ Aug 14 2009, 08:54 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
So realistically these are probably the biggest games of the season to date right?

Kind of crucial to win Lester's start tonight with Penny and the noob going after him.


Worst poem EVER.

#10 HowBoutDemSox

  • 331 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 09:02 AM

To score runs, or not to score runs: that is the question:
Whether 'tis better in the loss column to suffer
The GIDP and Ks of terrible offense,
Or to take action against some slumping veterans,
And by benching, end them? To sit: to rest;
No more; and by a sit to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That PED-inflated muscle tone is heir to, 'tis a lineup
Devoutly to be wish'd.


#11 Maalox


  • full of shit, and proud of it


  • 49118 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 09:05 AM

I wonder where that fish has gone.
You did love it so.
You looked after it like a son.

And it went wherever I did go.

Is it in the cupboard?
Wouldn't you like to know?
It was a lovely little fish.

And it went wherever I did go.

Where can that fish be?
("Have you thought of the drawers in the bureau?")
It is a most elusive fish!
And it went wherever I did go.

Ooooh, fishy, fishy, fishy fish!
A-fish, a-fish, a-fish, a-fishy-o!
Ooooh, fishy, fishy, fishy fish!
That went wherever I did go.

#12 DLew On Roids


  • guilty of being sex


  • 11933 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 09:15 AM

Twas a vision I had of the gloaming light
Balls flying deep into the prairie night

There was but one nut on the specified hitter
As a decrepit man trims his beard in the shitter

An old captain's ship has been taken today
And he's given but ten days to be sent away

Tis just a dream, I awake and I yearn
For the great tribe member's return

Maudlin still as I remember but then
That their cold leader's in love with old men

#13 Redkluzu


  • tortures mice


  • 1625 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 09:20 AM


When, in disgrace with pitching, bats and Highs,
We all alone beweep our outcast state
And rail against the Yankees with our bootless cries
And look upon ourselves and curse our fate,
Wishing us like to times when we claimed First,
Seeing the Series wins that we possessed,
Desiring this man's stats and that man's thirst,
With what we most enjoy contented least;
Yet in these thoughts ourselves almost despising,
Haply we think on Jon, and then our state,
Like to the lark at break of day arising
From sullen earth, says Wild Card's at the gate;
For Rangers' doom, we must remember is our path
To give the MFY a true bloodbath.


#14 Reggie's Racquet

  • 1764 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 09:31 AM

QUOTE (DLew On Roids @ Aug 14 2009, 07:15 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Tis just a dream, I awake and I yearn
For the great tribe member's return


Edit

Tiz (is) just a dream, I awake and yearn
For the great tribe member's return

Just win!

#15 Reggie's Racquet

  • 1764 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 09:42 AM

This Arlington?

Map Key:

Kevin Kennedy Grave Site
Visitor Center - Adam LaRoche highlights
Tomb of the Unknowns - Memorial to Last Night's Infield
Attractions - Heidi...of course!




May the Rangers rest in peace!



#16 Ed Hillel


  • Wants to be startin somethin


  • 41826 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 09:45 AM

Above the air, into the sea
There gleamed a life, so happily
The cat named Milford scampered in
Whiskers wide, forming a grin

At the counter, he ended his trot
Pulled out his wallet, and then he bought
A shiny, black object so fun
Oh, goodness joy, his favorite gun

He left the store, climbed up a tree
Looked out so far, as eyes could see
Pulled the trigger, BANG
His brain hit the ground with a clang

He was a robot cat

sad.gif


WIN

Edited by Ed Hillel, 14 August 2009 - 09:56 AM.


#17 OhBabyDontOrtizMe


  • economic samurai


  • 619 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 10:07 AM

Heaven and earth,
Must I remember? Why, Eric Van would hang on him
As if increase of potential had grown
By release from the DL, and yet, within a week—
Let me not think on't—Frailty, thy name is Lowrie!—

#18 MyDaughterLovesTomGordon

  • 3973 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 11:28 AM

O Big Papi, Papi! Wherefore art thou Big Papi?
Deny thy PEDs use and refuse thy benching;
Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn our love,
And we'll no longer be able to watch.

#19 Jody Reed

  • 0 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 11:50 AM

O Varitek, where are you roaming?
O, stay and hear; your Lester's coming,
That can pitch both high and low:
Trip no further, pretty sweeting;
Journeys end in Red Sox meeting,
Every wise man's son doth know.

What is love? 'tis not hereafter;
Present mirth hath present laughter;
What's to come is still unsure:
In delay there lies no plenty;
Then let us win, win by twenty,
Youth's a stuff will not endure.

Many thanks to Will Shakespeare. Win.

#20 hitting .525 in 1983

  • 33 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:06 PM

The most precious gift one human can give another, I believe, is a third human, such as a prostitute or a stripper, for a birtday or something.

Deep Thoughts by Josh Hamilton

#21 Sprowl


  • mikey lowell of the sandbox


  • 20739 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:13 PM

A word in Theo's shell-like ear:

Not that I think you did not love the Red Sox;
But that I know love is begun by time;
And that I see, in trade deadline deals,
Time qualifies the spark and fire of it.
There lives within the very flame of trade
A kind of wick or snuff that will abate it;
And no prospect is at a like goodness still;
For pitching, growing to a surfeit,
Dies in its own too much. That we would do
We should do when we would; for this "would" changes
And hath abatements and delays as many
As there are Gonzalez, Halladay, Hernandez
And then this "should" is like a depreciating prospect,
That hurts by failing. But, to the wild card race —
Texas comes back: what would you undertake,
To bring us a competent shortstop in deed
More than in words?


#22 Trlicek's Whip

  • 2953 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:15 PM

QUOTE (Sprowl @ Aug 14 2009, 12:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
A word in Theo's shell-like ear:
Boromir, he of silver tongue.

#23 HowBoutDemSox

  • 331 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:23 PM

Now is the late summer of our discontent
Made questionable our autumn by these mother fucking sons of (New) York;



#24 C4CRVT

  • 2402 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:25 PM

Zombie bats, zombie glove
Their chances I do not love

Stranding runners; striking out
Makes me scream and cry and pout

Lucky Penny, press on you fatty
Texas will likely be your daddy

Large Father, blessed corpse
sit or quit and have remorse

Tito, friend I'll buy you a beer
Sit his ass for the rest of the year

I'm not good at poetry.




#25 barbed wire Bob


  • crippled by fear


  • 3188 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:46 PM




Edited by barbed wire Bob, 14 August 2009 - 12:49 PM.


#26 barbed wire Bob


  • crippled by fear


  • 3188 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:46 PM




Edited by barbed wire Bob, 14 August 2009 - 12:50 PM.


#27 barbed wire Bob


  • crippled by fear


  • 3188 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:46 PM

Double post


Edited by barbed wire Bob, 14 August 2009 - 12:48 PM.


#28 barbed wire Bob


  • crippled by fear


  • 3188 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:46 PM

Sorry people. I have no clue what happened.


Edited by barbed wire Bob, 14 August 2009 - 12:52 PM.


#29 barbed wire Bob


  • crippled by fear


  • 3188 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:46 PM

"Papi, my Lad, this does everything crown!
Who could have supposed that you are still in Town?
And where's the performance, such prosperi-ty?" --
"O didn't you know? I am ruined" said he.

"You left us in tatters, with slim playoff hopes,
Tired of hitting potatoes, and line drive ropes;
And now you've stand up there and strike out three!" --
"Yes: that's how we perform when we're ruined," said he.

-- "You used to call baseball a wondrous dream,
And you'd grin and you'd sock; but at present you seem
To know only frustration and melancho-ly!" --
"True. One's not lively when ruined," said he.

-- "I wish we had a DH that could hit a ball downtown,
That would hit for power and win one for the Old Town!" --
"My Friend -- a raw country boy, such as you be,
Cannot quite expect that. I am ruined," said he.

Edited by barbed wire Bob, 14 August 2009 - 12:47 PM.


#30 FFCI

  • 197 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:52 PM






edit: not sure what happened before - and probably not worth an edit...



Edited by FFCI, 14 August 2009 - 04:13 PM.


#31 OhBabyDontOrtizMe


  • economic samurai


  • 619 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:55 PM

Poems getting played out
Shakespeare morphs into Haiku
Jeter anus face

#32 zenter


  • slumdog idol


  • 4736 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 12:57 PM

And Lester's spirit, raging for a win,
With YoukBay by his side, in Wild Card race,
Shall in these confines with a monarch's voice
Cry 'Havoc,' and let slip the dogs of war;
That this deed shall ravage Arlington
With Rangers Texan, groaning for burial.

EDIT: I miss Youk already. Ugh.

Edited by zenter, 14 August 2009 - 01:05 PM.


#33 zenter


  • slumdog idol


  • 4736 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 01:00 PM

QUOTE (OhBabyDontOrtizMe @ Aug 14 2009, 01:55 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Poems getting played out
Shakespeare morphs into Haiku
Jeter anus face

Haikus? Hard to write.
Red Sox ought to win tonight.
Refrigerator.

#34 86spike


  • Currently enjoying "Arli$$"


  • 22013 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 01:00 PM

Here Tek sits, all broken hearted.
Tried to catch, but pants were sharted.
Stunk the air and shook the walls.
Tek can't hit 'em, strikes nor balls.

#35 BoSoxFink


  • Stripes


  • 4751 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 01:01 PM

Mary had a little lamb, little lamb little......

Aww fuck it!!

WIN TONITE

#36 hitting .525 in 1983

  • 33 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 01:05 PM

QUOTE
Jeter anus face


Pure literary genius

#37 dauber23

  • 639 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 01:06 PM

A Gon
Once gone
Not gone
Glove gone?

Let's end the Nick Green era with a big win!

#38 mfried

  • 990 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 01:43 PM

If it's true that this is a REALLY important 3-game set, then I would have to rank tonight's game as a really important single game since it's the one which gives the Sox the best chance despite Millwood's very good year. Looking at the Sox' hitting vs. Millwood over his career vs. Texas' hitting vs. Lester we should do everything possible to take care of business.

My preferred lineup:
Ellsbury
Pedroia
Martinez ©
Bay
Drew
Lowell
Ortiz
Kotchman
Green (last guaranteed start?)

Guess who's our best hitter vs. Millwood. You got it - the one who's ineligible for the series in Tex.

Unfortunately I suspect we'll get
Ells
Ped
Mart (1b)
Bay
Ortiz
Lowell (3b)
Drew
Tek
Green

Lester prefers pitching to Tek (?????)

Edited by mfried, 14 August 2009 - 01:46 PM.


#39 MetSox1

  • 316 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 01:49 PM

Hello. Do you know us?

We're a Major League Baseball team.

But since we haven't won in Texas, nobody recognizes us in the lone star state, that's why we got Alex Gonzalez. No matter how far out of first we are, it's cool. You know, he keeps us from getting shut out at our favorite hotels and restaurant-type places. So if you're looking for some Big-League clout, apply for that little Venezuelan Shortstop.

Look what it's done for US. People still DON'T recognize us but...

We're contenders now!

<Dreamboat slides into home>
The Venezuelan Shortstop, don't steal home without it!

#40 SonsOfCharlieZink

  • 432 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 02:05 PM

This captain was once the man,
Gentle, plain, just and resolute, under whose cautious hand,
Against the foulest drought in history known in any sport or age,
Was saved these Boston Red Sox.

#41 StylzCLB9

  • 35 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 02:17 PM

My prefered lineup

ells cf
pedey 2b
victor c
bay dh
drew rf
Lowell 3b
reddick lf
kotch 1b
green ss

who's with me??

#42 OhBabyDontOrtizMe


  • economic samurai


  • 619 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 02:22 PM

QUOTE (StylzCLB9 @ Aug 14 2009, 03:17 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
who's with me??


For now, but I want to keep my options open.

#43 mfried

  • 990 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 02:33 PM

QUOTE (StylzCLB9 @ Aug 14 2009, 02:17 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
My prefered lineup

ells cf
pedey 2b
victor c
bay dh
drew rf
Lowell 3b
reddick lf
kotch 1b
green ss

who's with me??


Very interesting idea to banish Bay from defense, but no evidence that Tito agrees. I think this would work well for away games. I would stick with Bay defensively at Fenway. NB re Victor: if we want any production from him he can't catch more than 60% with judicious spacing. Ultimately I see Victor grabbing some abs at dh.

#44 OhBabyDontOrtizMe


  • economic samurai


  • 619 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 02:55 PM



#45 StylzCLB9

  • 35 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 03:29 PM

Yea I understand that Vic can't catch everyday but that was hopes for today think it's best lineup for today I know it's not possible but being an important game this would be my lineup although there is no chance Tito agrees once youks returns I'm on the Lowell as dh most of the time bandwagon

#46 Foulkey Reese


  • foulkiavelli


  • 20075 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 03:35 PM

Lineup: Reddick (CF), Pedroia, Martinez (1B), Bay, Drew, Lowell, Ortiz, Varitek, Green. #redsox

Well at the very least it's nice to see Ortiz hitting 7th.



#47 pokey_reese


  • SoSH Member


  • 5023 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 03:42 PM

QUOTE (Foulkey Reese @ Aug 14 2009, 04:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Lineup: Reddick (CF), Pedroia, Martinez (1B), Bay, Drew, Lowell, Ortiz, Varitek, Green. #redsox

Well at the very least it's nice to see Ortiz hitting striking out 7th.


edit: fixed

#48 FanSinceBoggs

  • 502 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 03:44 PM

Twas an evening to remember
and remember it we do
with David Ortiz at the plate
our anticipation grew.

"Those were the days"
said a maiden so fair and true
"our lives has not been the same
since David Ortiz withdrew."

"His shots were once majestic
so proud were we
until David Ortiz took away
what was freely given to thee."

"No sorrow or sadness
can capture thy truth
David Ortiz took steroids
and it turned him into Babe Ruth!"

"And now we move on
with our heads bowed low
the Yankees are in first place
and David Ortiz must go."

Edited by FanSinceBoggs, 14 August 2009 - 03:55 PM.


#49 SemperFidelisSox


  • suzyn


  • 10362 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 03:48 PM

Hopefully this was just a scheduled off day for Ellsbury, although his recent sucking might suggest a nagging injury that requires a day or two off.

#50 Al Zarilla


  • SoSH Member


  • 21103 posts

Posted 14 August 2009 - 03:49 PM

Hopefully a rest day for Ellsbury, or did he get banged up?

Edit, minute late, great minds and all that rot.

Edited by Al Zarilla, 14 August 2009 - 03:50 PM.