1134 replies to this topic

[njingles3]

One thought continued to run through my head in the midst of game one of this series. It was a simple thought, reinforced time and again, never stronger than after the Sox failed to mount a comeback. Unlike many of you, I was not thinking "choke" or "sweep" or "5 game lead."

This simple thought was as follows - "Lurker Nation needs a kick in the balls."

Thus I bring to you, Lurker Nation, my first game thread.

I understand the need to feel upset about this loss. I hate the Yankees too. It hurts to lose to them, it really does. No matter how much I told myself before the game that this series wouldn't change a thing, I couldn't help but sweat through every pitch like it was the last pitch I would ever see. I couldn't help but shout angrily at the baseball gods for every slight misfortune they bestowed upon the Red Sox. I couldn't help but hope for a comeback that would never come to fruition. There was one more thing - when it was all over, I couldn't help but feel sorrow for those members of Lurker Nation that truly believe this team is destined for anything less than the title of the American League's East Division. Just as I expect better from the Red Sox tonight, I expect better from Lurker Nation.

With that out of the way, I'd like to get to the guidelines portion of today's game thread.
There will be no poetry of any kind.
There will be no pictures of scantily clad women, straddling giant fish or otherwise.
Tonight, Lurker Nation, much like Hemingway, will use simple, short, firm prose. We will say what we mean, and mean what we say.
Unlike Hemingway, we will not blow ourselves away when things get tough (though, like Hemingway, we may get drunk).
Lastly, there will be no need for I am unoriginal and unfunny. Please put me out of my misery of any kind. Our starting pitcher, one Josh Beckett, will provide all the I am unoriginal and unfunny. Please put me out of my misery needed. Once again, when things get tough, we will not resort to I am unoriginal and unfunny. Please put me out of my misery, because the 2007 Boston Red Sox don't need it.

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is time to get down to business, and end this so-called race once and for all.

[njingles3]

If anyone wishes to get smart about the time this game thread was started, let me remind you: midnight I am unoriginal and unfunny. Please put me out of my misery, like any other form of I am unoriginal and unfunny. Please put me out of my misery, will be irrelevant to the discussion of tonight's baseball game.

[patman]

Josh Beckett, Certified Yankee Slayer. I believe that's what it says on his business card. Josh Beckett who mowed down the Yankees in game six, the final game, of the 2003 World Series. Josh Beckett who electrified the world and stupefied the Yankees with his fastball that night.



That is who we send out to toe the rubber for the Boston Nine tonight. That is f****** awesome.


Josh Beckett is indeed all we will need. He'll pitch a 2 hit shutout, and when Big Papi has to take over at first base after a set of circumstances that defy explanation, Beckett will hit the game winning homerun.

[January]

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is time to get down to business, and end this so-called race once and for all.

Amen.

Oh, and I gave us 3 stars. Seemed like a good place start.

[joelmon]

I hope you guys want the Yankees in the playoffs. Because you are doing a bang-up job allowing them to get there. (2-5 in your last 7 vs them)

Fucking pathetic for the best team in the division. Win, already, since the Mariners and Tigers don't seem to want it. And prove you are the best team. Stop always looking like bitches against them in the reg season in this 'Jeter Era'. Beckett has to prove he's a legit ace. No more 6 ip 5 er bullshit vs the Yankees. And, please, take pitches vs that fat scumbag.

Ok, great. Thank you

Edited by joelmon, 29 August 2007 - 05:52 AM.

[stuckinyankeeterritory]

Tonight is looking good - take the wind of the their pitiful little sail.

Becket, Okie, Paps
Clemens, (can't use Joba, oh my), (need to rest Mariano, oh my)


Brilliant use of Delcarmen by Tito !

[CoRP]

Through the fence, between the curling flower spaces, I could see them hitting.

[Doctor G]

The question is will Clemens retaliate for Arod getting plunked last night. This seems like a good possibility. Retaliation is the only thing that is generating good press for the Rocket these days in the NY rags.

Edited by Doctor G, 29 August 2007 - 07:15 AM.

[Foulkey Reese]

Last night sucked

But I've been waiting for Clemens to face a real offensive team with some actual patience at the plate for a while now......Sox are going to destory him

I just hope to god that Manny can play tonight

[vyrago]

Win please.

Simple, polite, but effective.

[Mr. Sparkle]

Through the fence, between the curling flower spaces, I could see them hitting.

Faulkner

[ridetheseal]

I'm sorry I couldn't take us any further but I am firmly behind njingles3, in a non-gay way of course.

[NatetheGreat]

Manny playing tonight? Hope so, 'cause I just don't wanna beat these guys, I want to crush them. The guy we're putting out on the mound isn't justa cy young candidate and the number 1 pitcher on the best staff in baseball, he's also taken these guys apart before on the biggest stage. The guy they're sending out is a fucking dinosaur built like a garbage bag full of cookie dough. And backing him up? Not Joba, Not Mo. No, he gets the back half of the Yankee bullpen.

Take this one, and not only does last night not matter, but in all liklihood tomorrow night doesn't either.

[donutogre]

I too am looking forward to a dominating performance by the Boston Red Sox tonight.

[Man-Ram4life]

Pretty sure we wont see Manny tonight but we shouldnt need him if Beckett tosses a gem.

[ajank002]

The sox are that dorky kid in college who is about to close the deal on the hot chick, but always seems to screw it up on the front porch.

But wait! You can always bring in the deal sealer......beckett you are the ace, the closer, the deal sealer. With you on the mound tonight we will get upstairs....glorious victory...

tomorrow the bra comes off.....

[Foulkey Reese]

The sox are that dorky kid in college who is about to close the deal on the hot chick, but always seems to screw it up on the front porch.

But wait! You can always bring in the deal sealer......beckett you are the ace, the closer, the deal sealer. With you on the mound tonight we will get upstairs....glorious victory...

tomorrow the bra comes off.....

awesome

[CoRP]

But wait! You can always bring in the deal sealer......beckett you are the ace, the closer, the deal sealer. With you on the mound tonight we will get upstairs....glorious victory...

tomorrow the bra comes off.....

Just ask Leann Tweeden. And no, I'm not going to post a pic. Sorry.

[Savin Hillbilly]

Last night they brought out their ace. Tonight we bring out ours.

Last night they were desperate for a win to save their season. Tonight they're still desperate for a win to save their season. Desperation only goes so far.

Last night our hitters were lulled to sleep by Pettitte's easy motion and 88-mph cutter. Tonight they will be wide awake and pissed off, aiming their scorching line drives squarely at Fat Billy's capacious ass.

[rembrat]

Well I’m over last night and ready to watch what I have been waiting for all season long, Josh Fucking Beckett silence 55,000 of New York’s most dense residents. I also forgive JD Drew and will be cheering him on. Win.

[Foulkey Reese]

Somebody on the main board mentioned that the MFY will miss both Kazmir and Shields when they play TB this weeked while the Sox will have to face Bedard on friday night.

So winning a game or two this series would be pretty big....and I'm sure it would make all of us feel a lot better.

I hope Tito goes for the kill with the bullpen today.

[ajank002]

Somebody on the main board mentioned that the MFY will miss both Kazmir and Shields when they play TB this weeked while the Sox will have to face Bedard on friday night.

So winning a game or two this series would be pretty big....and I'm sure it would make all of us feel a lot better.

I hope Tito goes for the kill with the bullpen today.

not to mention we face cabrera too........ sigh....i hope we can make things easier for ourselves, for once.....

[Savin Hillbilly]

not to mention we face cabrera too........ sigh....i hope we can make things easier for ourselves, for once.....

What's to sigh about? Historically, we crush Cabrera, especially at home.

[boggartlaura]

Tonight is looking good - take the wind of the their pitiful little sail.

Becket, Okie, Paps
Clemens, (can't use Joba, oh my), (need to rest Mariano, oh my)


Brilliant use of Delcarmen by Tito !

Okie and Paps won't be needed - Beckett will go all 9.

I expect a very special performance out of Beckett tonight.

[NomarRS05]

This is the most favorable pitching match-up of the series for the Red Sox, though things like that tend to fly out the window when the Red Sox and Yankees meet.

If Beckett does his thing, we should be fine. If we lose, then it's up to Schilling to salvage a game, and I don't think anybody wants that to happen.

WIN.

[Blue Monkey]

The sox will win tonight and tomorrow. All will be ok. The Fat Man is on my fantasy team but he is not starting becuase I'm quite sure he will suck. Now pound the Fat Man.

A rare televised game in the Phoenix area tonight. I will be watching w/ my big papi jersey on. He will go yard not once but twice. that is a fact.

POUND THE FAT MAN!!

[Bucket1923]

"He most honors my style who learns under it to destroy the teacher."

[theemerald33]

I cannot wait for this game to start tonight. I live in NY and the Yankee fans in my office are walking around with this stupid grin on.

[Al Zarilla]

Well I’m over last night and ready to watch what I have been waiting for all season long, Josh Fucking Beckett silence 55,000 of New York’s most dense residents. I also forgive JD Drew and will be cheering him on. Win.

Forgive JD Drew? I'm trying to come up with an analogy as good as ajank002's hot chick on the porch one, but I am speechless. Speechless! All I can say is that someone needs to put a burr or a red hot poker up his a**, or something. If this were war, or even football, I think they'd be finding the guy in an abandoned foxhole or under some bleachers...Imagine what Tedy Bruschi or Junior Seau would do with this guy?

[NatetheGreat]

The only ways I'm gonna forgive Drew are if he:

a.) Starts to not suck
b.) Commits ritual suicide ala Hara Kiri by beating himself to death with his own bat.

[SoxFanInPdx]

Offense needs to pick it up today, must. I have complete confidence today will be different than yesterday..other than I still have absolute zero confidence in Drew, make me wrong buddy. Win today and tomorrow too.

[ClutchBOS]

JD Drew seriously sucks...There's like..no words to describe how much he sucks.
Honestly, I have a some hope in my heart that he will go back to being an injured-prone JD Drew..not that im hoping for an injury..but...im just saying.

Ortiz shall kick the shit out of Clemens. Show that jerk that we don't need him...

Clemens: 4.1 IP, 5 H, 4 ER, 2 BB, 2 K's

[Bellhorn]

A repeat of the '03 Series clincher from Beckett sure would be fantastic.....but honestly, all we need today is a quality start.

Offense: let's get to Fat Billy EARLY in the game. He's only been pitching since the first Reagan administration - it shouldn't be a mystery what kind of pitches you can expect to see from him tonight.

WIN!!!!

[EP Sox Fan]

I really, really, really hate losing to the MFY. Last night I actually played the "Congrats, now you and your $200 million payroll is only 7 games back card" I would have much rather parlayed a victory into a smug look of satisfaction. Such is life.

Tonight: the young, fireballing ace from Texas vs. the old, fat, soul-selling, has-been, former ace from Texas. I, for one, and looking forward to sending Fat Billy packing in the fourth inning. As for Beckett? Game 6 of the 2003 World Series. Need I say more?

JD Drew. I thought signing you was great. I want to root for you. I want to like you. Why do you make it so hard? Lugo and Coco have turned it around. Why can't you? Have you seen Major League JD? I have reached the Randy Quaid "I hate the Wild Thing" level with you. Everytime you come up in a big spot, I am so consumed with negativity that it makes me sick. Tonight, you will come through. Tonight, you silence the Toilet by hitting a homer off Fat Billy.

Curtain call. How freaking annoying. Right field porch at the Toilet 314Ft. Damon hits one 315 ft and gets a curtain call. What don't they curtain call at the Toilet? How about a curtain call for Jeter making a play on a groundball to his right? How about a curtain call for the missed strike three call on the 1-2 count on Abreu in the first inning? Whatever.

Tonight: Fat Billy gets booed at the Toilet.

WIN.

[TeddyBallgame9]

JD Drew seriously sucks...There's like..no words to describe how much he sucks.
Honestly, I have a some hope in my heart that he will go back to being an injured-prone JD Drew..not that im hoping for an injury..but...im just saying.

Ortiz shall kick the shit out of Clemens. Show that jerk that we don't need him...

Clemens: 4.1 IP, 5 H, 4 ER, 2 BB, 2 K's

That line seems generous. Fat Billy goes 3 and gives up 7 EARNED! To paraphrase the Trojan Marching Band: Beat the Yankees, they're all fags.

[Foulkey Reese]

Manny out for "2-3 days" per Tito on ESPN radio (this was given to me by a friend...I didn't actually hear it"


Pretty shitty timing

[January]

I really, really, really hate losing to the MFY. Last night I actually played the "Congrats, now you and your $200 million payroll is only 7 games back card" I would have much rather parlayed a victory into a smug look of satisfaction. Such is life.

Just to be clear.

We are not playing to win the division, we are playing to break string of smug pinstripes in the playoffs that goes back to 1995! The Sox will recover their honor for last year.

It is time to win.

[Man-Ram4life]

I think the timing could be alot worse, like maybe when the race was down to 4 games.

[Foulkey Reese]

I think the timing could be alot worse, like maybe when the race was down to 4 games.

Well it could always be worse

But it would have been nice to have Manny in there against Clemens and Wang (who he destroys)

[CoRP]

There will be no pictures of scantily clad women

I love the fact that the mainboard gamethread broke this rule in their thread (I know it doesn't apply to them...but its funny nonetheless) with Debbie the she-male at 1:05pm today. I also love that you expect us to follow your rather strict set of rules but yet managed to break the one rule that game threads are supposed to follow. I'll try to play along (tonight at least) post no pics and write nothing but pithy comments that are completely focused on the game. I will also try not to invoke any sort of I am unoriginal and unfunny. Please put me out of my misery. Sprowl and Brood are both relieved to be done counting syllables so you shouldn't have any worries on that front. But tell me honestly, didn't some of those haiku make you spit beer out of your nose?

After tonight I will be disregarding your "rules" when I fell appropriate regardless of tonight's outcome. Some of the things I like about our threads are that they [usually] have no rules, are fun, are almost always cordial and usually make me laugh (multiple times). Sprowl has pointed out some rather good game threads from months past. I wonder if this one will also get a 5-star rating for anything other than the final score. I hope so.

Edited by City of Rosie Palms, 29 August 2007 - 02:25 PM.

[Jody Re]

As much as I wanted to win last night, this is the one we want. What better way to finish them than to beat Roger ( "I say I want to pitch closer to home but always pitch for whomever pays the most") Clemens. He had his chance to pitch for the Sox this year and salvage some of the hard feelings in Boston due to his departure. The Red Sox were way ahead of the MFY's in the standing when he made his decision so he couldn't claim he picked them so he could be with a winner. He could have stayed home with Texas again to be near his family. Instead, he decided to go with the most money (like he needed the extra how many millions it was). Schilling said we didn't need him. This is the perfect time to show that Schilling was correct. Bomb him tonight and make sure he retires for good this time.

And by the way, has anyone noticed how much bigger he is now than he was in his Red Sox days? I know its been along time and people do get bigger as they get older, but that much? One of the interesting things about Bonds was how his hat size increased while he was with the Giants. I wonder what Clemens hat size was when he left the Red Sox and what it is now.

It would make my week to see him shelled tonight and gone before the end of the 5th.


Go Sox!

[Foulkey Reese]

Lugo in LF tonight per Tito on ESPN radio

[Man-Ram4life]

Lugo in Lf is fucking dumb. Tito will find anyway possible to get Cora in the game. FUCK

[Bucket1923]

Manny out for "2-3 days" per Tito on ESPN radio (this was given to me by a friend...I didn't actually hear it"
Pretty shitty timing

This Post on the main board quotes Tito as saying Lugo will be in LF. Can that be right? Is Cora in the lineup with Lugo playing out of position that much better than Hinske in the lineup? I guess we'll see...maybe I just picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.

Edit: Foulkey beat me to it...

Edited by Bucket1923, 29 August 2007 - 02:16 PM.

[Foulkey Reese]

I guess they don't want to DL anybody and lose them for 15 days with rosters expanding in two days.

That really sucks though.....I'm pretty sick of Alex Cora

[shawnrbu]

Lugo is in LF today.

No Manny for the rest of the series.

[Foulkey Reese]

Alex Cora will be getting important at bats in a late August Yankees series

Just think about that

Why not just use Hinske already?

[Bucket1923]

Is there a chance that Tito didn't actually say Lugo would be in LF and rather that he would be the emergency outfielder if Drew or Hinske contract syphyllis tonight?

[NomarRS05]

Lugo is in LF today.

Fuck.