Game 1 - Bruins v. Blues

PedroSpecialK

PedroSpecialK

Comes at you like a tornado of hair and the NHL sa
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Dec 12, 2004
27,167
Cambridge, MA
St. Louis - what can be said?

The Blues made the Stanley Cup Finals in each of their first three years, a result of a drastically unbalanced NHL where the expansion teams in the West were cannon fodder for the winners of the East. Indeed, the Blues did not win a game in these three Finals appearances, and haven't returned to the SCF since their last appearance 49 years ago.

In addition to this rich hockey history, the Gateway to the West is one of the only places in the country where one can enjoy a 3x3" rectangular slice of 'pizza', consisting of a oregano-and-garbage cracker base and topped with Provel cheese - what a treat.

Visitors can also venture down to Busch Stadium to take in a game with the Classiest Fans in Sports. Get your tickets to pray the gay away with Lance Berkman! If you're lucky, you'll get to witness a standing ovation next time a former Cardinals callup returns to town. Bonus points if you can recite the alphabet backwards before the classy display concludes.

St. Louis is more Alabama than hockey town. Their reputation for class is akin to the 'sincerity' of Southern hospitality - an unctuous guise over a deep-seated smugness, despite having won but three championships since 1983 between the Cardinals, Blues, and Rams (RIP).

That brings us to the 2018-19 St. Louis Blues, a team that doesn't merit more than a few lines of lazy writing. Jordan Binnington is an AHL goaltender. Craig Berube is rolling the corpse of Jay Bouwmeester out there for 23 minutes a night. Ryan O'Reilly is an impoverished man's Patrice Bergeron. Maybe David Perron can be traded and re-acquired again before Game 1. And did you guys know Pat Maroon is from St. Louis?????

The road to Stanley Cup number 7 is paved with Provel. It starts tomorrow night.

PS "Gloria" fucking sucks
 
Leather

Leather

given himself a skunk spot
SoSH Member
Jul 18, 2005
28,451
Did you know they made the square mile or so around the Gateway Arch a fucking National Park? Not a national monument, or historic site, or anything more fitting for a quasi-futuristic glorified elevator shaft with some tiny windows at the top to gaze into beautiful East St Louis, but afforded the same dignity as Yellowstone or the goddamn Grand Canyon.

It’s a disgrace.
 
moretsyndrome

moretsyndrome

Member
SoSH Member
Jan 24, 2006
2,211
Pawtucket
PedroSpecialK said:
St. Louis - what can be said?

The Blues made the Stanley Cup Finals in each of their first three years, a result of a drastically unbalanced NHL where the expansion teams in the West were cannon fodder for the winners of the East. Indeed, the Blues did not win a game in these three Finals appearances, and haven't returned to the SCF since their last appearance 49 years ago.

In addition to this rich hockey history, the Gateway to the West is one of the only places in the country where one can enjoy a 3x3" rectangular slice of 'pizza', consisting of a oregano-and-garbage cracker base and topped with Provel cheese - what a treat.

Visitors can also venture down to Busch Stadium to take in a game with the Classiest Fans in Sports. Get your tickets to pray the gay away with Lance Berkman! If you're lucky, you'll get to witness a standing ovation next time a former Cardinals callup returns to town. Bonus points if you can recite the alphabet backwards before the classy display concludes.

St. Louis is more Alabama than hockey town. Their reputation for class is akin to the 'sincerity' of Southern hospitality - an unctuous guise over a deep-seated smugness, despite having won but three championships since 1983 between the Cardinals, Blues, and Rams (RIP).

That brings us to the 2018-19 St. Louis Blues, a team that doesn't merit more than a few lines of lazy writing. Jordan Binnington is an AHL goaltender. Craig Berube is rolling the corpse of Jay Bouwmeester out there for 23 minutes a night. Ryan O'Reilly is an impoverished man's Patrice Bergeron. Maybe David Perron can be traded and re-acquired again before Game 1. And did you guys know Pat Maroon is from St. Louis?????

The road to Stanley Cup number 7 is paved with Provel. It starts tomorrow night.

PS "Gloria" fucking sucks
Click to expand...
Would be fun is this "Gloria" got belted out Game 1.

 
ifmanis5

ifmanis5

Member
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Sep 29, 2007
63,938
Rotten Apple
Great thread starter. The chief progenitors of the Cardinals fans are the best fans narrative are Bob Costas, Tim McCarver, Joe Buck and Joe Garagiola, all of whom have St. Louis connections.

Never forget this abomination...
 
Leather

Leather

given himself a skunk spot
SoSH Member
Jul 18, 2005
28,451
The primary night life zone, the landing, smells like piss and has about 3 operational restaurants. The rest are closed.
 
Ale Xander

Ale Xander

Hamilton
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Oct 31, 2013
73,097
ifmanis5 said:
Great thread starter. The chief progenitors of the Cardinals fans are the best fans narrative are Bob Costas, Tim McCarver, Joe Buck and Joe Garagiola, all of whom have St. Louis connections.

Never forget this abomination...
Click to expand...
I don't understand this slicing concept. Won't the lox just fall this way? Not wasting lox is the unofficial 11th commandment.
 
luckysox

luckysox

Indiana Jones
SoSH Member
Apr 21, 2009
8,084
S.E. Pennsylvania
ifmanis5 said:
Great thread starter. The chief progenitors of the Cardinals fans are the best fans narrative are Bob Costas, Tim McCarver, Joe Buck and Joe Garagiola, all of whom have St. Louis connections.

Never forget this abomination...
Click to expand...
I lurk but do not comment in these threads. But as a woman who spent 10 years on Long Island within a 10 minute ride of the unmatched greatness that is A&S Bagels, I ask, what in the holy fucking hell is this shit? I had no particular ill will toward the Blues prior to seeing this picture. But no. No no no. Shit just got very fucking serious. Take no prisoners. Just kill.
 
Joe D Reid

Joe D Reid

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Jan 15, 2004
4,217
Also, these idiots are as petty as the St Louis subway is pointless. I had the pleasure of watching the ‘08 ALCS there and they were falling all over themselves to root against the Sox. They’re only classy when they think they have their boots on your neck.

I legit got side eye for drinking Miller. Which, admittedly, I ordered only to annoy them.
 
TheoShmeo

TheoShmeo

Skrub's sympathy case
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Jul 19, 2005
12,890
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My first live sports related memory is walking out of Boston Garden with my Dad after the clinching semi-final win over the Blackhawks and someone on the ramp yelling “bring on the Blues.”

Bring on the Blues!

Bring on the chance to see, yet again, a Boston team winning a title at the expense of St. Louis.

I had the good fortune of being at both SB 36 and Game 6 of the 2013 World Series. I have tix to Game 7 of this series and I might be in the house if the Bruins are in position to win the Cup in five games.

But I’m getting ahead of myself here. For now, I will just reiterate that I’m grateful that we have another chance to win at the expense of St. Louis. Because really, that means that a title is in grasp, and that’s always amazing and will never be taken for granted.

Four wins are needed. But only one can be bagged tonight. Bag away, win tonight.

I’m so excited.
 
LogansDad

LogansDad

Member
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Nov 15, 2006
29,707
Alamogordo
First, I would like to express how excited I am for this. Like.... really excited. Super duper excited, if one could ever coin such a term.

As a Massachusetts "ex-pat", and military member, sports has meant a lot to me over the years. They take me back home, sometimes make me feel like a kid again, and always give me enjoyment.

As someone who only recently (at almost 40!) started learning how to play hockey, I recognize even more how much goes into this, than any other sports. I've played baseball and softball for my entire life, and pick up football (tackle and otherwise), and so many other sports. Hockey is the most gratifying (even though I am terrible), and humbling (even when I play well) sport on the planet. These guys on the ice... watching them play, and hearing the interviews, and knowing what they go through for each other... man, this team is incredible.

This team, though.... I can't remember a group of people I only know on TV who I have ever been more enamored towards. Every player from the captain to the 9th defenseman just seem like incredible team players and people.

I'm not sure I've ever wanted a team to win a championship more than this one.

Win this fuckign series.
 
IdiotKicker

IdiotKicker

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Nov 21, 2005
10,815
Somerville, MA
Those poor bagels. There's a reason why St. Louis has seen its population decline in each of the last seven decades and has seen two different football teams move away in the past 30 years. It might not be those bagels.

But it might be.

235 days ago, the Boston Bruins got thumped by the Capitals 7-0. To quote myself in that game thread, "Literally everything is bad."

Since then, this team has overcome every single obstacle planted in its way. Everyone said Toronto was a faster and more talented team than the Bruins. That talent is now sitting on its ass, wondering how to get rid of its slice off the tee. Everyone said that Columbus had the best goalie and that the best goalie usually wins the series. Now, Fraudrovsky is sitting at home with visions of Johansson's soft-ass goal slipping through his pads for the rest of the summer. And let me tell you, everyone, Doc Emrick included, told me there was a storm surge coming and that Carolina knew how to play hockey. And to be honest, they really didn't.

So now people want to say that St. Louis has some big bad defensemen that are going to scare the Bruins. Oh, they play so heavy. And how on earth are the Bruins going to stop Tarasenko? And did you know that Jaden Schwartz has scored 12 goals this postseason? Wowee.

Enough.

It's time to send these bagel-murdering punks a message. And that message is simple.

Boston doesn't lose to St. Louis.

Tonight, we make that clear. It's the Stanley Fucking Cup, ladies and gentlemen. It's here. And it ain't leaving.

Win tonight.
 
G

Gammon_Clark

New Member
Apr 24, 2010
250
I’m going to leave this right here.

Excuse me while I go run through a fucking wall..


Edit: shit, beaten by TheRealness
 
Preacher

Preacher

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Jun 9, 2006
6,451
Pyeongtaek, South Korea
I lived in St Louis a bit after taking the bar exam and before starting my job. What a shitty city. Also, toasted ravioli sucks. Why would someone take a perfectly fantastic pasta dish, bread it, and fry it? Because they’re a bunch of classless fucks, that’s why. Crush the fucking Blues!
 
InstaFace

InstaFace

The Ultimate One
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Sep 27, 2016
22,103
Pittsburgh, PA
I once found myself and a buddy on a cross country road trip that took us through St Louis. It was post Internet but pre smartphones, so I called friends back home to look up a good spot for ribs. They steered us to a place that looked more rundown than anyplace I've seen in the Bronx, a corner of a sad strip mall in a sad part of a sad city: Ropers Ribs.

They were rubbery, over-sauced, and the cornbread tasted funny. The fucking cornbread. This at a place that had risen to the top of the St Louis BBQ list on whatever it was that preceded Yelp.

Let's treat them like they treat notions of cuisine.
 
Preacher

Preacher

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Jun 9, 2006
6,451
Pyeongtaek, South Korea
Another I just remembered from my time living in STL. If you lived in the city and you didn’t have garage parking (I had to park on the street when I lived there), you could go to the police station and get a free Club for your car. The city actually figured out it was cheaper to hand out clubs to help prevent car theft than spend additional hours investigating those thefts. That was their car theft prevention measure. What a piece of shit city.
 
Zososoxfan

Zososoxfan

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Jul 30, 2009
9,229
South of North

This is not going to be easy. STL has been a downtrodden city both generally and for sports, and they are going to try and take out this pent up rage on our beloved Bruins. But, this is Title Town, USA. As Paul Pierce once noted, they don't keep track of winning the conference here, only the pretty banners.

Go back and watch videos from 2011. The amount of opportunities to Nancy that year were plentiful. The amount of drinking RMPS collectively did that spring would make an Aussie rugby crowd blush. There's no patience for that this year (not since the Taranna series anyway). Sack up. Know that our guys are better than their guys and they want it, they need it, they thirst for it more. Protect. The. Civic.

Go out there tonight and march toward becoming Champions.
 
Red Averages

Red Averages

owes you $50
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Apr 20, 2003
9,138
Went for a run around the Garden at 2pm and already saw about a hundred people walking towards their pregame establishments. Expecting a lively, and fueled up crowd for this one.

Win game 1.
 
Boston Brawler

Boston Brawler

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Jan 17, 2011
9,762
So Thursday night, I drove 22 hours over two days from KS to Boston. Gave some stuff we aren’t taking to Germany to my parents and brothers. Went to a wedding Saturday night and then started to drive back Sunday morning to KS.

When we drove through St Louis about 2 hours ago, my two oldest sons and I got out of the car to fart.

Like, we held them specifically to fart there. What a shit town.

Win.
 
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