tOSU - We are all out of body parts with which to slap Michigan in the face

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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This thread is devoted to the greatest college football team in the land, the greatest fans in the land and of course, a pretty good band as well.

Seriously though, how cute is it that Michigan think they might have a chance against us ever in the history of ever? On a scale of 1 to 10 I am giving it a literal 10. Super cute. Harbaugh is now playing in a place he has never been, a place where losing two or three games a year doesn't cut it. He is in line for another ass kicking this November and at that point the tone has to shift to "you are not Jim Tressel, my friend," at which point he starts taking the Colts' calls. I do not see him coaching in Ann Arbor in 2018. Book it.

And on our end, a continued commitment to excellence. The Scarlet and Gray will continue our reign of pure badassery until Harbaugh's moobs are around his ankles. At some point we will actually talk about some football, but for today I think we stick to being drunk (me) and talking about Michigan (also, apparently, me).

 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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I'm fine if this thread just turns into us goofing on the Michigan thread for the next few months. They are actually talking about how important it is for Michigan to win big this upcoming season. Harbaugh doesn't have "win big" in his vocabulary. He is a 10-2 coach. He may have a clause in the deal he has drawn up with the Colts already that specifically says that he doesn't have to coach any more than 12 games a season so that he can preserve that record.
 

PaulinMyrBch

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I'm down here pulling for Clemson, but just wanted you guys to know I haven't referred to the blue's coach as anything but "Toolbaugh" in months. Figured I could post that here. Seriously pulling for OSU to just slap them around for years. I was OK with him when he was at Stanford, don't know why, maybe his antics didn't hit twitter until after I was in bed.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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I'm down here pulling for Clemson, but just wanted you guys to know I haven't referred to the blue's coach as anything but "Toolbaugh" in months. Figured I could post that here. Seriously pulling for OSU to just slap them around for years. I was OK with him when he was at Stanford, don't know why, maybe his antics didn't hit twitter until after I was in bed.
Anyone who is against Michigan is more than welcome to post in here. As we get closer to the season I will be pulling quotes from the Michigan thread to openly goof on them. At this point is all kind of jumping up and down about overhyped prospects, which while totes adorbs from Michigan fans, all fans do this so I can't rip them too hard.

Does anyone still see Harbaugh coaching Michigan in three seasons? The Colts gig will be open at the end of this year. Think about it.
 

deanx0

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If you're looking for a Michigan fan to goof on, check the BC thread where he likes to troll the Eagles fans--he's like Kramer dominating the dojo in there. I doubt he has the stones to take on Buckeye backers.
 

tims4wins

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If you're looking for a Michigan fan to goof on, check the BC thread where he likes to troll the Eagles fans--he's like Kramer dominating the dojo in there. I doubt he has the stones to take on Buckeye backers.
Fantastic reference
 

twibnotes

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Any alums in here?

I've met a lot of Buckeye fans...but I haven't met many people who actually went to OSU.
 

kenneycb

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If you're looking for a Michigan fan to goof on, check the BC thread where he likes to troll the Eagles fans--he's like Kramer dominating the dojo in there. I doubt he has the stones to take on Buckeye backers.
I can't tell whether to laugh or be insulted by this. I guess I'll just start a thread in P&G about it.
 

twibnotes

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Skrub went to Ohio State, but he's cool.
I asked bc I went to Michigan Business School with a good number of OSU fans...none of them went to OSU. I then went to a game at the Shoe (the Clarett / nat champ year...ugh), and met a bunch of their friends...none of them had gone either. Seemed more like a pro sports team to a bunch of people who had suffered through too many Browns setbacks.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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Two things about Michigan business school. A) it sucks. And b) shut up. Like all great Ohioans, i was born in the center of the state to good, Ohio-type people, and was blessed with Buckeye fandom from that point forward.

My alma mater won 4 games in the 5 football seasons I was there too so.....you know.

So in summary, while it is true that the vast majority of tOSU fans did not attend the institution, the same is true for most major college programs, including Michigan. The only difference is that most Michigan fans are either convicted felons or serial masturbators. True story, during the schembechler era the Michigan tailgate was referred to as "the Circle Jerk." You can look that up. If anyone says differently they are lying. Bo used to talk about his favorite lubricants on his Monday morning radio show pretty regularly.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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As a point of fact, I have a cousin who is currently enrolled at tOSU. It is, admittedly, his 24th year there, but we are pretty convinced that this will be the year he gets through his junior year.

And as a follow up, there is an official policy that after you have purchased student tickets for 8 years you are removed from the list permanently (I assume it's still in place....this came up 16 years Ago.....) regardless of your student status. That is how a program with integrity is run!!!
 

Old Fart Tree

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I asked bc I went to Michigan Business School with a good number of OSU fans...none of them went to OSU. I then went to a game at the Shoe (the Clarett / nat champ year...ugh), and met a bunch of their friends...none of them had gone either. Seemed more like a pro sports team to a bunch of people who had suffered through too many Browns setbacks.
I've heard these referred to as Target Buckeyes or Target Wolverines because they have to buy their t-shirts at Target.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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You sure that wasn't Wal-Mart?
Dammit, you stole my response.

And for the record, I have probably received as a Christmas or birthday gift basically the same Buckeye t-shirt about 13 times from various aunts and grandparents throughout my life. But they were from Dillard's because we are crazy fancy people.
 

johnmd20

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My wife and her sister when to tOSU. I have adopted the buckeyes as my team because of this. Michigan is a horrible institution with a cry baby for a coach. You get the coach you deserve.
 

kenneycb

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Which is why Tressel and Meyer have done such a good job recruiting guys that have significant trouble with the law. You get the coach you deserve.
 

kenneycb

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Well if you're Harbaugh's full body of work, I see no reason to include Urban's.

Of note, I have disliked Harbaugh since his SF days.
 

Old Fart Tree

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You sure that wasn't Wal-Mart?
Yeah. The Target Wolverine (but actual black knight of the Hudson) specifically said Target. But what do I know? When we became friends he decided to become a Target Tree and with the power vested in me I gave him the green light. Or wait. Did we just change it because of the alliteration?

It's all starting to make sense.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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Yeah. The Target Wolverine (but actual black knight of the Hudson) specifically said Target. But what do I know? When we became friends he decided to become a Target Tree and with the power vested in me I gave him the green light. Or wait. Did we just change it because of the alliteration?

It's all starting to make sense.
There is a lot about this timeline that doesn't quite make sense. So he was the Black Knight for Army, but after meeting you he decided to become a Target Tree? You know, I have a feeling that this is a case where I don't want to know how the sausage is made, so let's just put a pin in it and enjoy the fact that these conversations occur.
 

Old Fart Tree

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Not *the* Black Knight, but *a* Black Knight, who grew up in Michigan and therefore was a Wal-Mart Wolverine. When we became friends he started also supporting Stanford, so I gave him authorization to be a Target Tree. I'm pretty sure we changed to Target because of the alliteration, and it was in fact Wal-Mart Wolverine before. But hey, I drink a lot of martinis so sometimes I forget things.
 

SoxJox

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A martini man - now we're talkin'.

I'm a straight up, shaken-not-stirred, with Bombay [original - not Sapphire], with olives (don't need to be stuffed, but if forced to choose elect bleu cheese).
 

Sea Bass Neely

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Any alums in here?

I've met a lot of Buckeye fans...but I haven't met many people who actually went to OSU.
Haven't been around here in quite some time...but yes I like it so much I did undergrad and law school there. And moved back about 5 years ago.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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In this instance, given that the kid was projected to carry the rock a good amount, I have to say yes. It was the right thing to do and Urban did it. I criticized the hell out of Tressel's graduation rates long before the program got attention, I will call a spade a spade. But in this instance Urban did very much the right thing. Go suck a dick.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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It's been a long time since I have been in here and for that I apologize, I have been busy. But with our beloved Bucks on the verge of another Autumn of Triumph let's go over what has happened in the last month:

1) The Ohio State Buckeyes named "The greatest team ever in the history of ever, suck our nuts."

http://www.sbnation.com/college-football/2016/8/2/12358742/ohio-state-ranking-ap-poll-100

This balloting must have taken about two minutes. Michigan being rated over Texas, Florida State and Miami just shows that winning big in the 30s counts for something to the AP. Great job Gerald Ford era Michigan players!

2) The Colts continue to struggle in the preseason. I'm sure that it will all be fine during the regular season and at no point will Jim Harbaugh get annoyed at being questioned by Michigan alum following losses to Wisconsin, Michigan State and an ass-kicking at tOSU. Does Jim still have his townhouse in Indianapolis from his Captain Comeback days? Hey, I just got that joke - he will be Captain "Coming back to Indianapolis" in January 2017!!! LoL.

3) Other stuff.

I am excited to see the game against the Sooners. A road game against those guys is never fun, but man do I have a strong dislike for Baker Mayfield.
 

tims4wins

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Yammer you keep banging the Harbaugh to Indy drum - is that based on any kind of knowledge on your part, or just pure hunch? As a (partial) Michigan guy I really don't care for the guy and would rather root for someone else, plus if he went to Indy it would give me more reason to continue hating that franchise too. Double win.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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Yammer you keep banging the Harbaugh to Indy drum - is that based on any kind of knowledge on your part, or just pure hunch? As a (partial) Michigan guy I really don't care for the guy and would rather root for someone else, plus if he went to Indy it would give me more reason to continue hating that franchise too. Double win.
It's not hard to figure this out:

1) Harbaugh was a big deal for the Colts before Manning.

2) Harbaugh has a good relationship with the Irsays (apparently, who ever knows about these things)

3) The Colts think that they have a potential championship squad with Luck at QB over the next 5 seasons, and they may be right.

4) Both the coach and GM are on the hot seat, making it a perfect "here are the keys to the franchise" situation, which would feed into Harbaugh's ego.

5) Harbaugh likes being challenged or questioned about as much as you or I like being punched in the balls repeatedly. He is not thick skinned.

6) Michigan doesn't have enough talent to win the Big 10 this season and it seems unlikely that they will do so next season. The alumni at Michigan - like many schools, including tOSU - err on the side of delusional expectations. If Harbaugh has another 3 loss season and loses big to tOSU again he is going to start to hear criticism. At Stanford they were thrilled with 3 loss seasons. At Michigan.....not so much.

5 and 6 get Harbaugh sick of the Michigan gig. 1-4 get him out of town.
 

Rick Burlesons Yam Bag

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Yeah, that's pretty uncompelling to me. Harbaugh is not ending up with the Colts.

@Rick Burlesons Yam Bag - Rather that promote an unproductive dialogue, I'm happy to make a friendly wager for charity about whether Harbaugh ends up with the Colts? Your call.
Wow, a Michigan fan is skeptical that anyone would leave their beloved program? Lol.

Sure, given that you seem so certain I am sure you would be up for long odds given the specificity of the bet. 50--1? I would go with you on that. If you want to knock it down to "Harbaugh leaves Michigan after the 2017 season or before" I would take that at 3-1 and go pretty big.